Picky eater with guests

Nancy Young said:

Hah, I bet when your mother was serving the other military wives
hot dogs, there was dessert. GarONtee.

nancy

Yup, most likely. And keep in mind when serving guests one usually does
do a bit more than the bare minimum or simple family meal. That's what
makes a party a bit more fun, eh?

Nancy Young said:

"jmcquown" <[email hidden]> wrote

Quoted message said:

Nancy Young wrote:

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

But then I'm not into 'dinner parties', per se. I guess what's for
dessert then is just that, here's the dessert course.

Quoted message said:

I wasn't raised having dessert after every meal so I don't really
understand
why people feel the need to do that. I guess some folks were raised
that way but to me, dessert is something they offer you at a
restaurant. But then again, I'm not into entertaining, either 🙂

Hah, I bet when your mother was serving the other military wives
hot dogs, there was dessert. GarONtee.

nancy

Now that's totally different! Mom had cocktail parties with aperitifs and
Hors d'Oeuvres and sliced hotdogs in a bourbon mustard sauce served in a
chafing dish. But that's not dessert! I think maybe she had petit fours or
lady fingers. I don't know, I wasn't really allowed to do much more than
make an appearance in a frilly dress to say a polite hello 🙂

Jill

"jmcquown" <[email hidden]> wrote

Quoted message said:

Nancy Young said:

"jmcquown" <[email hidden]> wrote

Quoted message said:

Nancy Young wrote:

Quoted message said:

> But then I'm not into 'dinner parties', per se. I guess what's for
> dessert then is just that, here's the dessert course.

Quoted message said:

I wasn't raised having dessert after every meal so I don't really
understand
why people feel the need to do that. I guess some folks were raised
that way but to me, dessert is something they offer you at a
restaurant. But then again, I'm not into entertaining, either 🙂

Hah, I bet when your mother was serving the other military wives
hot dogs, there was dessert. GarONtee.

Quoted message said:

Now that's totally different! Mom had cocktail parties with aperitifs and
Hors d'Oeuvres and sliced hotdogs in a bourbon mustard sauce served in a
chafing dish. But that's not dessert! I think maybe she had petit fours
or
lady fingers. I don't know, I wasn't really allowed to do much more than
make an appearance in a frilly dress to say a polite hello 🙂

I think maybe she definitely had petit fours or lady fingers. (laugh)

nancy

Goomba38 <[email hidden]>
news:[email hidden]:

Quoted message said:

Yup, most likely. And keep in mind when serving guests one usually does
do a bit more than the bare minimum or simple family meal. That's what
makes a party a bit more fun, eh?

Sure does, if it's a planned party.

Sometimes we'll have friends drop by unannounced. While I find this
somewhat annoying I usually ask them to stay for lunch or dinner. In the
case of the "drop ins" I'll serve whatever I was originally going to make.
However, I have found that a pretty garnish goes a long way in this
situation.

--
Time for a snack:
http://i6.tinypic.com/14l26fk.jpg

Need coffee!
http://i5.tinypic.com/14l26no.jpg

Comparing Body Mass:
http://i5.tinypic.com/14l26u8.jpg

In article <[email hidden]>,

D.Currie said:

When she divvies up desserts, she'll often cut larger or smaller pieces for
certain people, rather than make them all even.

I do that all the time.
--
-Barb
<http://jamlady.eboard.com> Updated 6-15-2006; Spanish Chicken and
Rice.
"If it's not worth doing to excess, it's not worth doing at all."

D.Currie said:

Every time this happens, I think that it's not what I'd do. I'd either offer
choices to everyone at the table, or I'd expect the picky eater to just
decline whatever it was, rather than get something "special" that wasn't
offered to everyone else.

I agree with you. I don't live with picky eaters, but one of the few
things (and I mean few, I think the list is 5very specific items long)
my older son doesn't like is green salad. Guests or no guests, if I
make that as a side dish, I will make another side dish too (often
tomato salad or chinese cabbage salad), but I'll make enough of it
that others can have some too.

Nathalie in switzerland

Melba's Jammin' <[email hidden]>
news:[email hidden]:

Quoted message said:

In article <[email hidden]>,

D.Currie said:

When she divvies up desserts, she'll often cut larger or smaller
pieces for certain people, rather than make them all even.

I do that all the time.

One thing I pay very close attention to, when it comes to a dinner party,
is dietary restrictions. I try my best to find out who is allergic to what
and if anyone requires low fat or low carb due to heart disease, diabetes
etc.

Michael

--
Time for a snack:
http://i6.tinypic.com/14l26fk.jpg

Need coffee!
http://i5.tinypic.com/14l26no.jpg

Comparing Body Mass:
http://i5.tinypic.com/14l26u8.jpg

Melba's Jammin said:

In article <[email hidden]>,

D.Currie said:

When she divvies up desserts, she'll often cut larger or smaller pieces for
certain people, rather than make them all even.

I do that all the time.

At their request?

Sue(tm)
Lead me not into temptation... I can find it myself!

D.Currie said:

But I don't live with a picky eater, so maybe it just seems odd to me
because I'm not used to it. Maybe if you live with someone like that long
enough, it's routine for them to get a separate item and you don't think
about it any more.

But it also seems odd that the wife acknowledges that people have different
preferences, but she doesn't ask her guests' preferences, she just serves
them.

So, if you live with a picky eater, how do you handle this sort of thing?

I don't live with a picky eater. My wife will eat just about anything with the
exception of beets and lima beans. She has some food allergies that we try to
work around. I doubt that I could come up with a dessert that she wouldn't eat,
but if there was, I really doubt that I would go ahead and make it for guests
and then make something different for her.

My son was always pretty adventurous about foods. I can't think of anything he
refused to eat, though there were things he ate grudgingly. I know that he
always complained about roast lamb, though he didn't mind having lamb so much
when it meant that I made curried lamb with the leftovers.

D.Currie said:

I was invited to a dinner recently and when dessert came around, everyone
was served a slice of chocolate cake, except for the husband, who was served
some sort of fruit pie with two small scoops of different flavors of ice
cream. The wife, after she sat down, explained that her husband didn't like
chocolate, but with six people for dinner, she felt that it was worth buying
a chocolate cake.

This sort of thing has happened before at dinners at this house. With salad,
veggies, and soup, that I can recall. The husband is very picky.

Every time this happens, I think that it's not what I'd do. I'd either offer
choices to everyone at the table, or I'd expect the picky eater to just
decline whatever it was, rather than get something "special" that wasn't
offered to everyone else.

But I don't live with a picky eater, so maybe it just seems odd to me
because I'm not used to it. Maybe if you live with someone like that long
enough, it's routine for them to get a separate item and you don't think
about it any more.

But it also seems odd that the wife acknowledges that people have different
preferences, but she doesn't ask her guests' preferences, she just serves
them.

I suspect that she is extremely frustrated on a daily basis by the
husband's limitations and uses the dinner party as an outlet for her
culinary creativity. As long as the husband doesn't get anything
obviously "better" than the guests (eg. steak while the others get
burgers) -which would be mean- I understand why she does it. However,
for dessert it would have been nice to offer everyone a choice of pie
or cake. Not only would it reduce the envy factor of people who'd
rather have pie, but the husband's problem would be downplayed.

Sue(tm)
Lead me not into temptation... I can find it myself!

D.Currie said:

I was invited to a dinner recently and when dessert came around, everyone
was served a slice of chocolate cake, except for the husband, who was served
some sort of fruit pie with two small scoops of different flavors of ice
cream. The wife, after she sat down, explained that her husband didn't like
chocolate, but with six people for dinner, she felt that it was worth buying
a chocolate cake.

This sort of thing has happened before at dinners at this house. With salad,
veggies, and soup, that I can recall. The husband is very picky.

----

Quoted message said:

So, if you live with a picky eater, how do you handle this sort of thing?

It seems kind of rude (like a wedding where the head table eats lobster
while the guests are served chicken) that she didn't give the other
guests a choice.

I don't have any picky eaters (except maybe my son-in-law but he's not
terrible) but I often offer a choice of two desserts and don't mind in
the least when a guest says "May I have some of each."

As far as the rest of the meal, what you see is what y'all get and feel
free to ignore any item you don't like. Oh, and I'd prefer if you
didn't verbally share your dislikes with the rest of us. That makes me
hostile.

gloria p

Quoted message said:

So, if you live with a picky eater, how do you handle this sort of thing?

Divorce, separation, homicide. Picky eaters are like spoiled children.
They just want special attention. It's not like the food would kill them or
that it is hard to eat like some Japanese dishes. I for one will not cook
special meals just to please some twit who never grew up.

Paul

Goomba38 said:

Ohmygod. How incredibly rude and thoughtless that hostess is.

That was my reaction too.

Quoted message said:

I wonder if she was even conscience of her action and the "unsaid" statement she
made?

I wonder why her guests are willing to put up with that nonsense more
than one time.
--

Ham and eggs.
A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.

D.Currie said:

When she divvies up desserts, she'll often cut larger or smaller
pieces for certain people, rather than make them all even. Which is
one reason I go help her serve dessert. Usually I skip it entirely,
and if I'm there when she's slicing, I can stop her from serving any
to me.
Donna

Unless someone specifically asks for a small piece, or the recipient is a
child, this is incredibly rude and ungracious. (As is serving a special
dessert to her husband. She had several much better options: serve everyone
a non-chocolate dessert or offer the options to everyone, just to name two.
If she wanted to offer chocolate and fruit desserts, she could have served
everyone several fruit sorbets with a plate of truffles on the table to
select from.)

This person definitely doesn't have the art of entertaining down AT ALL.
Embarrassing and humiliating your guests is not the point!

Curly Sue said:

I suspect that she is extremely frustrated on a daily basis by the
husband's limitations and uses the dinner party as an outlet for her
culinary creativity.

Since she bought the cake, that excuse would seem to be out! <G>

jmcquown said:

D.Currie said:

I was invited to a dinner recently and when dessert came around,
everyone was served a slice of chocolate cake, except for the
husband, who was served some sort of fruit pie with two small scoops
of different flavors of ice cream. The wife, after she sat down,
explained that her husband didn't like chocolate, but with six
people for dinner, she felt that it was worth buying a chocolate
cake.

I think she should have offered a choice of chocolate cake, pie with
or without ice cream, or just ice cream to all the guests. Doesn't
matter if her husband is picky, that was just sort of awkward. I'm
not overly fond of chocolate cake, or pie for that matter, but I'd
have loved a scoop of ice cream 🙂

As that wasn't the planned dessert, there might not have been enough to
offer to guests. The pie and ice cream could have been leftovers from
previous meals.

Brian
--
If televison's a babysitter, the Internet is a drunk librarian who
won't shut up.
-- Dorothy Gambrell (http://catandgirl.com)

D.Currie said:

It seems strange to me, too. Just about as strange as when she served
dessert at another dinner, and everyone got average/large slices, but one
woman was served a small slice. The woman was chubby perhaps, but she didn't
make any mention of being on a diet or wanting a small dessert. When she saw
the size of her pie compared to everyone else's she looked a bit shocked, to
say the least. She didn't say anything, but the look on her face was enough.

That's just RUDE! You don't discriminate against your dinner guests
when you serve them - either put the food on the table buffet-style
and let them help themselves, ASK them how much/what they would like
before you dish, or give everyone the same... the only valid reason to
discriminate in what you give people is if you know that one person is
allergic to something, or on a restricted diet for medical reasons. In
which case the easiest thing to do is to make enough of both foods for
everyone to have a bit if they want it, or to leave the offending dish
off the person's plate and give them more of what everyone else is
eating instead... eg. if I was cooking for a diabetic, I'd make/buy a
sugar-free dessert to accompany the regular one, and dish theirs
first, but I'd still ask if anyone else would like it instead/as well.

When we had guests for dinner we'd usually have a choice of dessert,
and ask people which one they'd like to have... my father would always
say 'both' (he's greedy!) so he'd just get half as much of each, or
I'd give him one and say he could have the other if he was still
hungry when he finished.

"jmcquown" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

D.Currie said:

I was invited to a dinner recently and when dessert came around,
everyone was served a slice of chocolate cake, except for the
husband, who was served some sort of fruit pie with two small scoops
of different flavors of ice cream. The wife, after she sat down,
explained that her husband didn't like chocolate, but with six people
for dinner, she felt that it was worth buying a chocolate cake.

I think she should have offered a choice of chocolate cake, pie with or
without ice cream, or just ice cream to all the guests. Doesn't matter if
her husband is picky, that was just sort of awkward. I'm not overly fond
of
chocolate cake, or pie for that matter, but I'd have loved a scoop of ice
cream 🙂

Jill

She's gotten used to the fact that I usually decline dessert, so the last
time she made it a point to ask me. But with everyone else, she just served
up a portion to each.

I also find that a bit odd, not to ask. I always ask people if they want
any, and if it's something that's portionable, I either let them serve
themselves, or I ask them as I'm cutting slices how large a piece they want.
And there is always the option of seconds.

Donna

Melba's Jammin said:

In article <[email hidden]>,

D.Currie said:

When she divvies up desserts, she'll often cut larger or smaller pieces for
certain people, rather than make them all even.

I do that all the time.

I do too, but in response to people's REQUEST, or what I know of their
appetites... there's no point in dishing up a gigantic icecream sundae
for a person who never eats more than a quarter of it - that would be
a waste of good food - but it's horribly judgemental to say 'you
shouldn't eat dessert because you're too fat/have too many pimples/I
don't like you, so I'm going to give you a child-sized serve for your
own good'. If I KNOW somebody will eat less/more I'll give them a
serve in proportion... more often I'll just cut ALL the pieces small
and tell people that there's more in the kitchen if they want seconds.

"Janet Puistonen" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:QzAkg.20$d9.5@trndny04...

Quoted message said:

Curly Sue said:

I suspect that she is extremely frustrated on a daily basis by the
husband's limitations and uses the dinner party as an outlet for her
culinary creativity.

Since she bought the cake, that excuse would seem to be out! <G>

Maybe it's just to escape the boredom of eating what he eats. She doesn't
enjoy cooking so much that she'd make 2 things when one would do, so maybe
this made sense to her.

Donna