Message from Damsel

Puester said:

Melba's Jammin said:

"Damsel in dis Dress"wrote:
(snip)

Quoted message said:

Highlights of the past week:
* Stabbed my hand with one of the skewers on the rottiserie.
* Set fire to Crash's hair.

shoots to hell my theory that there are two kinds of
kitchen-accident-prone people: burners and cutters. Appears you're
adept at both.

Hmmm. That might make an interesting thread/poll:

"Are you a burner or cutter? To yourself or others?"

I am a burner - I have gotten much better over the years - but I burn
myself several times a week. Just recently I figured out (with the help
of my non-cooking but very wise husband) that the same aloe gel that is
in the fridge for sunburn would ACTUALLY work on other kinds of burns.
Ahhh, all the years I suffered through the pain :P

Roberta (in VA)

Melba's Jammin said:

I've incurred burns but nothing requiring
visits to the ER. My burns are usually because I've forgotten that the
handle of the skillet that I've put in the oven gets hot, too; unlike
when the skillet is used on the stove top. More than once.

Yep. My burns usually come from the oven, too.

I'm always convinced that I can take pans out of the oven with one hand,
therefore I don't have to go looking for the second potholder.
Inevitably the pan is too heavy or begins to slip and I reach for the
other side with the second, unprotected hand. Ouch.

The worst burn I've ever experienced was at dear daughter's house.
I had reheated coffee in the microwave in one of her lovely, hand-thrown
pottery cups. I reached in to pull it out and all four fingers were
seared by the handle. Turns out the mug had some kind of metallic glaze
and it was HOT. Ever since, I microwave lukewarm coffee in a Pyrex
measuring cup, then pour it into a mug.

gloria p

Melba's Jammin said:

I've incurred burns but nothing requiring
visits to the ER. My burns are usually because I've forgotten that the
handle of the skillet that I've put in the oven gets hot, too; unlike
when the skillet is used on the stove top. More than once.

Yep. My burns usually come from the oven, too.

I'm always convinced that I can take pans out of the oven with one hand,
therefore I don't have to go looking for the second potholder.
Inevitably the pan is too heavy or begins to slip and I reach for the
other side with the second, unprotected hand. Ouch.

The worst burn I've ever experienced was at dear daughter's house.
I had reheated coffee in the microwave in one of her lovely, hand-thrown
pottery cups. I reached in to pull it out and all four fingers were
seared by the handle. Turns out the mug had some kind of metallic glaze
and it was HOT. Ever since, I microwave lukewarm coffee in a Pyrex
measuring cup, then pour it into a mug.

gloria p

Nancy1 said:

Ah, but the most efficient suicide cut is one that is lengthwise along
the vein, not across the wrist. I'm sure most potential suicides don't
know this.

N.

Thanks for clarifying that, just in case anyone needed to know.

:-(
gloria -p

Nancy1 said:

Ah, but the most efficient suicide cut is one that is lengthwise along
the vein, not across the wrist. I'm sure most potential suicides don't
know this.

N.

Thanks for clarifying that, just in case anyone needed to know.

:-(
gloria -p

On Fri, 27 Jan 2006 03:51:09 GMT, Puester <[email hidden]>

Quoted message said:

Melba's Jammin' wrote:

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

shoots to hell my theory that there are two kinds of
kitchen-accident-prone people: burners and cutters. Appears you're
adept at both.

Hmmm. That might make an interesting thread/poll:

"Are you a burner or cutter? To yourself or others?"

You really don't want to know how clumsy I am in the kitchen... it's a
miracle I haven't chopped anything off! I think I'm more likely to
burn myself than cut myself though - there's always an opportunity to
brush your wrist against the hot oven shelf when pulling a baking pan
out, or to accidentally touch the edge of the frypan while it's in
use. Ouch!
The worst burn I ever gave myself was actually a scald - I was cooking
roast lamb in the electric frypan and I had hot water in there, and
fat that had seeped out of it. I went to turn the leg over in the pan
and it slipped off the fork and sent a tidal wave of boiling water and
fat cascading over my tummy. Took months to heal and I was too
embarassed to go to the hospital or doctor about it (I was 14)... then
there was the time I poured the rice into the colander too fast and
the water bounced off the edge of the sink and overflowed onto my
foot... I try to be more careful nowadays!

--
~Karen aka Kajikit
Crafts, cats, and chocolate - the three essentials of life
http://www.kajikitscorner.com
Online photo album - http://community.webshots.com/user/kajikit

On Fri, 27 Jan 2006 03:51:09 GMT, Puester <[email hidden]>

Quoted message said:

Melba's Jammin' wrote:

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

shoots to hell my theory that there are two kinds of
kitchen-accident-prone people: burners and cutters. Appears you're
adept at both.

Hmmm. That might make an interesting thread/poll:

"Are you a burner or cutter? To yourself or others?"

You really don't want to know how clumsy I am in the kitchen... it's a
miracle I haven't chopped anything off! I think I'm more likely to
burn myself than cut myself though - there's always an opportunity to
brush your wrist against the hot oven shelf when pulling a baking pan
out, or to accidentally touch the edge of the frypan while it's in
use. Ouch!
The worst burn I ever gave myself was actually a scald - I was cooking
roast lamb in the electric frypan and I had hot water in there, and
fat that had seeped out of it. I went to turn the leg over in the pan
and it slipped off the fork and sent a tidal wave of boiling water and
fat cascading over my tummy. Took months to heal and I was too
embarassed to go to the hospital or doctor about it (I was 14)... then
there was the time I poured the rice into the colander too fast and
the water bounced off the edge of the sink and overflowed onto my
foot... I try to be more careful nowadays!

--
~Karen aka Kajikit
Crafts, cats, and chocolate - the three essentials of life
http://www.kajikitscorner.com
Online photo album - http://community.webshots.com/user/kajikit

"Nancy1" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Lisa Ann wrote:
was unloading dishes, reached down and...whoops! Sliced my wrist open.
The

Quoted message said:

ER folks were convinced it was a failed suicide attempt.

Lisa Ann

Ah, but the most efficient suicide cut is one that is lengthwise along
the vein, not across the wrist. I'm sure most potential suicides don't
know this.

LOL - actually, I *do* know this, and pointed it out to the guy stitching me
up. I also asked him how many potential suicides came thru the doors
covered in pizza sauce?

They don't have much of a sense of humor while they're stitching you up,
ever notice?

Lisa Ann

"Nancy1" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Lisa Ann wrote:
was unloading dishes, reached down and...whoops! Sliced my wrist open.
The

Quoted message said:

ER folks were convinced it was a failed suicide attempt.

Lisa Ann

Ah, but the most efficient suicide cut is one that is lengthwise along
the vein, not across the wrist. I'm sure most potential suicides don't
know this.

LOL - actually, I *do* know this, and pointed it out to the guy stitching me
up. I also asked him how many potential suicides came thru the doors
covered in pizza sauce?

They don't have much of a sense of humor while they're stitching you up,
ever notice?

Lisa Ann

Puester said:

Hmmm. That might make an interesting thread/poll:

"Are you a burner or cutter? To yourself or others?"

I'm an accidental cutter. Myself only.

But it was hard to convince the E.R. people when I went in with a gash
in my lower leg a few years ago that I really HAD knocked the knife off
the counter and my husband hadn't come after me with it.

gloria p

Cutter. I have all these little nicks and scars on my hands and fingers. I'm
almost phobic about burns and freak out if they happen. When I bought my house
the first thing I did the day I closed on it was to go in and rip out the
in-the-wall oven. It was too high and I was too short and I knew I would only
burn my arms trying to get things out. Also removed the countertop stove and
had a gas line run in there and got a new gas stove.

I hate burning myself. I'm not saying I enjoy cutting myself, just that I'm
pretty calm when it happens, I usually just tape a napkin on and keep going.

--
..:Heather:.
www.velvet-c.com
Step off, beyotches, I'm the roflpimp!

Puester said:

Hmmm. That might make an interesting thread/poll:

"Are you a burner or cutter? To yourself or others?"

I'm an accidental cutter. Myself only.

But it was hard to convince the E.R. people when I went in with a gash
in my lower leg a few years ago that I really HAD knocked the knife off
the counter and my husband hadn't come after me with it.

gloria p

Cutter. I have all these little nicks and scars on my hands and fingers. I'm
almost phobic about burns and freak out if they happen. When I bought my house
the first thing I did the day I closed on it was to go in and rip out the
in-the-wall oven. It was too high and I was too short and I knew I would only
burn my arms trying to get things out. Also removed the countertop stove and
had a gas line run in there and got a new gas stove.

I hate burning myself. I'm not saying I enjoy cutting myself, just that I'm
pretty calm when it happens, I usually just tape a napkin on and keep going.

--
..:Heather:.
www.velvet-c.com
Step off, beyotches, I'm the roflpimp!

Melba's Jammin said:

LOL! I'm a cutter, too. Self only. At the ER, the intake person
invited me and me alone to her desk a ways away - told Rob to wait over
there. I am convinced that it was to provide safe haven in case I
wanted to tell her that he'd done it. :-) Hmmmmm, maybe I missed
an opportu. . . . <grin> I've incurred burns but nothing requiring
visits to the ER. My burns are usually because I've forgotten that the
handle of the skillet that I've put in the oven gets hot, too; unlike
when the skillet is used on the stove top. More than once.

I once tripped and hit my cheekbone on the counter (don't ask, I truly am
retarded) and I had more than one co-worker ask me if everything was "okay"
and assure me that I could talk to them any time. And it just sounds so lame
to say "oh no no no I just fell, i'm such a klutz"

--
..:Heather:.
www.velvet-c.com
Step off, beyotches, I'm the roflpimp!

Melba's Jammin said:

LOL! I'm a cutter, too. Self only. At the ER, the intake person
invited me and me alone to her desk a ways away - told Rob to wait over
there. I am convinced that it was to provide safe haven in case I
wanted to tell her that he'd done it. :-) Hmmmmm, maybe I missed
an opportu. . . . <grin> I've incurred burns but nothing requiring
visits to the ER. My burns are usually because I've forgotten that the
handle of the skillet that I've put in the oven gets hot, too; unlike
when the skillet is used on the stove top. More than once.

I once tripped and hit my cheekbone on the counter (don't ask, I truly am
retarded) and I had more than one co-worker ask me if everything was "okay"
and assure me that I could talk to them any time. And it just sounds so lame
to say "oh no no no I just fell, i'm such a klutz"

--
..:Heather:.
www.velvet-c.com
Step off, beyotches, I'm the roflpimp!

Karen AKA Kajikit said:

The worst burn I ever gave myself was actually a scald - I was cooking
roast lamb in the electric frypan and I had hot water in there, and
fat that had seeped out of it. I went to turn the leg over in the pan
and it slipped off the fork and sent a tidal wave of boiling water and
fat cascading over my tummy. Took months to heal and I was too
embarassed to go to the hospital or doctor about it (I was 14)... then
there was the time I poured the rice into the colander too fast and
the water bounced off the edge of the sink and overflowed onto my
foot... I try to be more careful nowadays!

oooh! ouch!
That reminds me of when I was 11, I had to cook dinners over the summer
because both of my parents worked. I was a really small kid (I'm only 5 feet
tall now). I was pouring boiled potatoes into the colander to drain them so I
could make mashed potatoes and I tipped the pot too much and poured boiling
water down my belly and legs and feet. oh my god that was terrible.

--
..:Heather:.
www.velvet-c.com
Step off, beyotches, I'm the roflpimp!

Karen AKA Kajikit said:

The worst burn I ever gave myself was actually a scald - I was cooking
roast lamb in the electric frypan and I had hot water in there, and
fat that had seeped out of it. I went to turn the leg over in the pan
and it slipped off the fork and sent a tidal wave of boiling water and
fat cascading over my tummy. Took months to heal and I was too
embarassed to go to the hospital or doctor about it (I was 14)... then
there was the time I poured the rice into the colander too fast and
the water bounced off the edge of the sink and overflowed onto my
foot... I try to be more careful nowadays!

oooh! ouch!
That reminds me of when I was 11, I had to cook dinners over the summer
because both of my parents worked. I was a really small kid (I'm only 5 feet
tall now). I was pouring boiled potatoes into the colander to drain them so I
could make mashed potatoes and I tipped the pot too much and poured boiling
water down my belly and legs and feet. oh my god that was terrible.

--
..:Heather:.
www.velvet-c.com
Step off, beyotches, I'm the roflpimp!

"The Bubbo" <[email hidden]> wrote in message

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

I once tripped and hit my cheekbone on the counter (don't ask, I truly am
retarded) and I had more than one co-worker ask me if everything was

"okay"

Quoted message said:

and assure me that I could talk to them any time. And it just sounds so

lame

Quoted message said:

to say "oh no no no I just fell, i'm such a klutz"

Heather, you definitely have my sympathy...we tell my mom that she's going
to die in some horribly tragic - and yet funny - household accident. She
has (so far):

a) got both hands stuck in a wringer washer at the same time.
b) while trying on a toy helmet back in the '60s, got the "nose cone"
actually
stuck on her nose. She almost had to rip the tip of her nose off to get
this thing off.
c) For reasons known only to her, thought it would be funny to stick her
hands into
2 kool-aid mugs (again in the 60s, the round kind) where they got
stuck...and
everyone was laughing too hard to help her pull them off.
d) Got a furball at my house and almost choked to death (okay, this says
less about her
than it does about my housekeeping...but still, it's pretty funny
watching your mom
imitate Bill the Cat.)
e) Fell *off* another washing machine and cracked 3 ribs. ("Mom, just
please tell me
it wasn't during the spin cycle...I'll have to kill myself if that's
what you were doing..."
f) and last but not least - so far - almost drowned in my sister's toilet.
She was helping
my sister move, and Kristi had some really stubborn stains in the
toilet...so Mom
decides to pour an entire bottle of bleach in there and scrub it. With
the door closed.
With the windows closed. Without the exhaust fan on. Luckily, Kristi
found her in
time.

I dread my mother's funeral, not just because I dread losing my mother...but
because I fear people coming up to me saying "So <snicker> sorry <snicker>
about your loss <mad hysterical laughter>"

Lisa Ann

"The Bubbo" <[email hidden]> wrote in message

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

I once tripped and hit my cheekbone on the counter (don't ask, I truly am
retarded) and I had more than one co-worker ask me if everything was

"okay"

Quoted message said:

and assure me that I could talk to them any time. And it just sounds so

lame

Quoted message said:

to say "oh no no no I just fell, i'm such a klutz"

Heather, you definitely have my sympathy...we tell my mom that she's going
to die in some horribly tragic - and yet funny - household accident. She
has (so far):

a) got both hands stuck in a wringer washer at the same time.
b) while trying on a toy helmet back in the '60s, got the "nose cone"
actually
stuck on her nose. She almost had to rip the tip of her nose off to get
this thing off.
c) For reasons known only to her, thought it would be funny to stick her
hands into
2 kool-aid mugs (again in the 60s, the round kind) where they got
stuck...and
everyone was laughing too hard to help her pull them off.
d) Got a furball at my house and almost choked to death (okay, this says
less about her
than it does about my housekeeping...but still, it's pretty funny
watching your mom
imitate Bill the Cat.)
e) Fell *off* another washing machine and cracked 3 ribs. ("Mom, just
please tell me
it wasn't during the spin cycle...I'll have to kill myself if that's
what you were doing..."
f) and last but not least - so far - almost drowned in my sister's toilet.
She was helping
my sister move, and Kristi had some really stubborn stains in the
toilet...so Mom
decides to pour an entire bottle of bleach in there and scrub it. With
the door closed.
With the windows closed. Without the exhaust fan on. Luckily, Kristi
found her in
time.

I dread my mother's funeral, not just because I dread losing my mother...but
because I fear people coming up to me saying "So <snicker> sorry <snicker>
about your loss <mad hysterical laughter>"

Lisa Ann

In article <[email hidden]>,

Lisa Ann said:

we tell my mom that she's going to die in some horribly tragic - and
yet funny - household accident. She has (so far):

(snip) unfortunate events

Quoted message said:

I dread my mother's funeral, not just because I dread losing my mother...but
because I fear people coming up to me saying "So <snicker> sorry <snicker>
about your loss <mad hysterical laughter>"

Lisa Ann

OMA!! Poor dears -- both of you! But what a way to be remembered!!
Great stories for the gathering after the Dead Spread is served.
--
http://www.jamlady.eboard.com, updated 1-27-2006, The Best Dead Spread Yet

Nancy1 said:

Lisa Ann wrote:
was unloading dishes, reached down and...whoops! Sliced my wrist open.
The

Quoted message said:

ER folks were convinced it was a failed suicide attempt.

Lisa Ann

Ah, but the most efficient suicide cut is one that is lengthwise along
the vein, not across the wrist. I'm sure most potential suicides don't
know this.

N.

I could write books about the faulty suicide attempts by patients I've
dealt with. For some, it just didn't pay to get up that morning....they
tried to do themselves in and did such a bad job of it that NOW they
REALLY have something to be depressed over. <sigh>

Melba's Jammin said:

In article <[email hidden]>,
"Damsel in dis Dress" <[email hidden]> wrote:
(snip)

Quoted message said:

Highlights of the past week:
* Stabbed my hand with one of the skewers on the rottiserie.
* Set fire to Crash's hair. BIG flames! Must have been 6 inches,
right in front of his face. Now he's going to get the remaining hair
cut short.

shoots to hell my theory that there are two kinds of
kitchen-accident-prone people: burners and cutters. Appears you're
adept at both. Nice move, D. "-) How'd you torch your true love? I
can't wait to hear.

He's been pretty shaky lately. Also keeps blacking out and falling (he
has a doctor's appointment on Tuesday). He asked me to light his
cigarette for him. I didn't even think about the hair that was hanging
over his face, between the lighter and the cigarette. [censored]! That'll
teach him to ask me for help!

Crash got his hair cut in that style that's spikey on top and short on
the sides and back. His daughter won't recognize him when she sees him
in a couple weeks. I also trimmed his beard and mustache quite short.

I got about five inches cut off my hair, and lots of layers. It looks
so full and healthy now. In a couple months, as they trim the hair to
maintain the style, my silver hair will be the whole length of the
hair. The silver is pretty heavy right in front (I love it!), and I'm
developing a very nice salt and pepper thing throughout the rest of my
hair.

Looks like we're going to need a new mother board with a CPU for the
computer. I don't think that'll happen any time soon. If anyone has
something like that that they're not using anymore, please post or drop
me a line. I don't recall the type we need right now (at the library
again).

Oh, and when we slow roasted the pork, Crash stuck the thermometer into
the meat (while it was still in the oven), and when he got the reading,
he removed the thermometer with his hand. No trips to the ER for the
burn, but it hurt! So put Crash down as a burner. He says he can cut
and burn himself in the same day. I don't let him cook very often.

Will someone please write to Steve Calvin and Victor Sack and let them
know that I'm not ignoring them, just can't quite contact them right
now?

Better go find my mom's barbecue sauce for the pulled pork. Can't
wait!

Carol and Crash, both looking quite respectable for a change