I propose that we give an occasional Special Award to the Clueless Numpty Cager of the
Week/Month/Day/Whatever.
I was going to nominate one I saw in the MDG today - two middle-lane road owners travelling at about
70, overtaking a two mile stretch of slow-moving empty lane, and a bloke in a Rover goes howling
past me (I'm in lane 1), comes up behind them, brakes, and follows them with about a 0.5s gap. Lane
3 is empty, lane 1 is empty, but his lane is lane 2 and that's where he's staying.
But there was a much better one after I picked up the bike to ride home.
I was riding towards Reading along Bell Street, Henley, when a red Peugeot people carrier came up
behind me. The driver immediately started trying to squeeze past, so I moved further out (gently
because I wasn't actually sure he hadn't got his bumper past my back wheel). Round a sharp
left-hander, and he tried again - this time hooting. Why does this deserve special mention?
Because, dear reader, Henley is currently host to a Festival - the entire town is choked with cars
and I was moving in a stream of traffic at about 10mph, less than three feet from the back of the
car in front! There was NOWHERE FOR HIM TO GO! So we round the next bend and the road widens out
to two lanes. Immediately Captain Clueless goes roaring up the left side, moving at speed for a
distance of easily fifty feet before having to stop in the queue for the lights. This gained him
that all-important one car length lead over me (also giving me the opportunity, encouraged by his
open window, to indulge in a rare moment of indulgence - loudly informing him that it was a
traffic jam and he was a [censored]). It'a a pity I wasn't joining his onanistic little race, really,
because the bridge was jammed solid so as soon as the lights changed I cruised straight past him
with a cheery wave :-)
Not sure why I shouted - probably acting under the influence of having driven a MDG from
Birmingham :-(
Guy
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