Hi, I've got alot of questions about stuff and these newsgroups look to be the best place to ask.
Basically the problem is this. (this is a very long post so i apologise, i tend to ramble on alot)
Im 21 and I weigh 11.5 stone. When i was 11 i weighed 11, at age 12 i was 12 etc. this carried on
until I was 15 and weighed 15 stone, i stayed at this weight till i was 18/19. I was teased alot at
school and i hated my weight issue. Especially since girls said i had a really nice face, but my
body was too fat (kids are cruel!!).
Around 19 years old I had a big breakdown. I was very depressed due to lots of problems in my life
and in my past, one of which being my weight issue. I hardly ate. I had a few 'ryevetas' (cant spell
it, u know what i mean, rye crackers) a day and lots of water. thats it. I did this for 4 months and
went from 15 stone to about 10. I thought I looked fat still but my friend said i was too thin and u
could see my chest too much (i have a bit of a pigeon chest so it looked bad). I eventually agreed
that at 6 feet tall 10 stone wasnt enough. Regardless I was gloriously happy to have lost all the
weight. The reason i thought i was still fat was cause on my stomach i had excess skin, which i
presumed to be fat, but its just loose skin. This made me feel even worse, i cried all the time
worrying that I have ruined my body. My bum is flat, its just saggy skin. It looks like the bum of a
50 y/o man, not a 21 y/o. Its just handfulls of skin and it makes me sick. Im not being big headed
but im very good looking, i know i am and people dont understand why i have no confidence.
Its hard cause im in drama school and this world is so much about looks and looking good, especially
in the entertainment business. What hope do i have of been a good lookin actor guy with this messed
up body :-( I know alot of you will say its my own fault and I ruined my body, but i know this. It
annoys me cause I see this guy in my class and hes a bit podgy (like me now) but his bum is all
round and full and id adore to have that, mine is just flat and saggy with a crease at the bottom.
So I want to know what to do. Ive been to the gym and built muscle but that does not clear it away.
Should I put weight back on then lose it slowly so the skin can tighten?? I have been offered
modeling work a few times but i have no confidence, and i know that when they see my upper body ill
be laughed at :-(
Reading this i sound vain, i am in a way, but everyone who wants to improve their look is vain in a
way. I just want to look like other young guys, not a middle aged man.
Thank you for reading this and before you judge me try hard to understand how much this worrys me.
Worried guy.