Worried about Mom....advice?

Oh pshaw, on Sun 14 Oct 2007 09:35:43p, Nexis meant to say...

Quoted message said:

Ok, before anyone lectures, I'm not asking for medical advice, just
opinions on if this is really something to worry about or if I'm reading
too much into it.

My mom is someone who lives a "healthy lifestyle" and has for decades.
When I was a kid, as the medical world began to evolve, we discovered
that cholesterol problems and heart disease were a problem in my mom's
family. She ate right, exercised every day but Sunday, took supplements,
etc. She was lucky in that she didn't like alot of things that are most
people's weakness...i.e. chocolate, most sweets, etc.

A few years ago, she had some problems with shortness of breath &
dizziness. 2 days later she was having a quintuple bypass. She recovered
very well, and was soon back to her busy and active self.

My worry is this: Lately, she doesn't like to eat. She used to love
breakfast, now she is not interested. She makes food and goes to
restaurants, but eats about what a small (and I mean 1-2 yr old) child
would eat, and not much else. She doesn't eat anything before 11 am or
so (though she's up at 4 am), and has a bowl of soup around 3 pm or so,
and if it wasn't for my dad, I think she'd skip dinner altogether. She
mostly wants soup. In the evening, she'll have a cup or tea or coffee,
but not much else unless there's company and she serves dessert, and
then she'll have a few bites. I have recently talked to her about
discussing her lack of appetite with her doctor, but she thinks it's
after effects of a long passed gastric episode (6 weeks ago). She says
she just don't like food much anymore. She still takes vitamins and
she's on medication for cholesterol, blood thinners, and something for
blood pressure.

Does this sound like something serious? Would you insist on talking to
the doctor? Or wait and see what happens?

Thanks in advance,

kimberly

I would urge her to consult her doctor. It may very well be nothing, but
I'd want to know for sure. Significant changes in eating habits, bowel
habits, gastric problems, all in general should be looked into. Better
safe than sorry.

--
Wayne Boatwright
__________________________________________________

Answers: $1, Short: $5, Correct: $25, dumb looks
are still free.

"Nexis" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...
She still takes vitamins and she's on

Quoted message said:

medication for cholesterol, blood thinners, and something for blood
pressure.

Does this sound like something serious? Would you insist on talking to the
doctor? Or wait and see what happens?

Thanks in advance,

kimberly

The longer I stayed on blood pressure medication, cholesterol lowering drugs
(no blood thinner) and vitamin supplements, the sicker I got.

I'm not even beginning to suggest discarding medication that a doctor
orders, but sometimes medications can be changed or adjusted. DH's father's
medication caused him all sorts of problems (really big problems), until DH
started pushing the doctors.

Take charge if possible for another's health care. It's not always easy,
but it is possible.

--
Dee Dee
"A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy
enough people to make it worth the effort."

Nexis said:

Does this sound like something serious? Would you insist on talking to the doctor? Or
wait and see what happens?

It certainly can't hurt to get it checked out. I myself, probably
wouldn't wait. It may be nothing, but then again, if it is something
and you wait to see what happens, you may end up kicking yourself that
you didn't go get it checked out sooner rather than later. And many
times, if it is something, no matter what, the earlier that it is
discovered means that treatment might be much easier.

Just my two cents.

Christine

Nexis said:

Ok, before anyone lectures, I'm not asking for medical advice,
just opinions on if this is really something to worry about or
if I'm reading too much into it.

[snip]

Quoted message said:

My worry is this: Lately, she doesn't like to eat. She used to
love breakfast, now she is not interested. She makes food and
goes to restaurants, but eats about what a small (and I mean
1-2 yr old) child would eat, and not much else. She doesn't
eat anything before 11 am or so (though she's up at 4 am),
and has a bowl of soup around 3 pm or so, and if it wasn't for
my dad, I think she'd skip dinner altogether. She mostly wants
soup. In the evening, she'll have a cup or tea or coffee, but
not much else unless there's company and she serves dessert,
and then she'll have a few bites. I have recently talked to
her about discussing her lack of appetite with her doctor, but
she thinks it's after effects of a long passed gastric episode
(6 weeks ago). She says she just don't like food much anymore.

You are definitely right to be concerned. The first question
that comes to mind: has she lost weight? If not, then there
is probably not too much to worry about -- although she's still
best off talking to her doctor about it.

If she is losing weight, and especially if her weight is now below
normal, then it is more important to seek medical attention.
From the sound of it, she has a regular doctor, and she almost
certainly is weighed at each doctor visit, so the doctor
(if they're paying attention) should notice any big change.
In most cases unexpected weight loss calls for a physical exam
and perhaps lab work.

Best,
Steve

Nexis said:

My worry is this: Lately, she doesn't like to eat. She used to love
breakfast, now she is not interested. She makes food and goes to
restaurants, but eats about what a small (and I mean 1-2 yr old) child
would eat, and not much else. She doesn't eat anything before 11 am or
so (though she's up at 4 am), and has a bowl of soup around 3 pm or so,
and if it wasn't for my dad, I think she'd skip dinner altogether. She
mostly wants soup. In the evening, she'll have a cup or tea or coffee,
but not much else unless there's company and she serves dessert, and
then she'll have a few bites. I have recently talked to her about
discussing her lack of appetite with her doctor, but she thinks it's
after effects of a long passed gastric episode (6 weeks ago). She says
she just don't like food much anymore. She still takes vitamins and
she's on medication for cholesterol, blood thinners, and something for
blood pressure.

Does this sound like something serious? Would you insist on talking to
the doctor? Or wait and see what happen

Has she admitted to or have you noticed a weight loss? What exactly was
the gastric "episode" she experienced weeks ago?
Otherwise, anorexia could obviously be a sign of many problems. I would
suggest a visit to her GP.

"Nexis" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Does this sound like something serious? Would you insist on talking to the
doctor? Or wait and see what happens?

Thanks in advance,

kimberly

Sounds serious to me. Deliberately or not, your mother seems to be starving
herself. If she refuses to see her doctor, then you and/or your father
should let the doctor know what's going on. Ask yourself what could happen
if you just "wait and see".

Felice

"Felice Friese" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

"Nexis" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Does this sound like something serious? Would you insist on talking to
the doctor? Or wait and see what happens?

Thanks in advance,

kimberly

Sounds serious to me. Deliberately or not, your mother seems to be
starving herself. If she refuses to see her doctor, then you and/or your
father should let the doctor know what's going on. Ask yourself what could
happen if you just "wait and see".

Felice

I'm not even suggesting this is the case in your case; but just ruminating
about my m-i-l who first stopped drinking coffee, after drinking it all her
life from morning until night, when she started at the beginning of
dementia/Alzheimers. Later it dwindled down to eating almost nothing. When
we visited, all of our meals were at restaurants; she would maybe eat a
spoonful of this or that. But at one of the places we ate, there were
free-hand-out cookies at the register (packaged, of course, for Janet), and
she would always practically skip to those cookies on the way out.

But, she had been a fussy eater all her life; I don't think she had ever
gained an ounce.
Dee Dee

Nexis said:

Does this sound like something serious? Would you insist on talking to
the doctor? Or wait and see what happens?

Thanks in advance,

Talking her into going for a check-up at your Doc. couldn't hurt,
Kimberly. Hope you can swing it.

--
Cheers
Chatty Cathy

Garlic: the element without which life as we know it would be impossible

"Nexis" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Ok, before anyone lectures, I'm not asking for medical advice, just
opinions on if this is really something to worry about or if I'm reading
too much into it.

My mom is someone who lives a "healthy lifestyle" and has for decades.
When I was a kid, as the medical world began to evolve, we discovered that
cholesterol problems and heart disease were a problem in my mom's family.
She ate right, exercised every day but Sunday, took supplements, etc. She
was lucky in that she didn't like alot of things that are most people's
weakness...i.e. chocolate, most sweets, etc.

A few years ago, she had some problems with shortness of breath &
dizziness. 2 days later she was having a quintuple bypass. She recovered
very well, and was soon back to her busy and active self.

My worry is this: Lately, she doesn't like to eat. She used to love
breakfast, now she is not interested. She makes food and goes to
restaurants, but eats about what a small (and I mean 1-2 yr old) child
would eat, and not much else. She doesn't eat anything before 11 am or so
(though she's up at 4 am), and has a bowl of soup around 3 pm or so, and
if it wasn't for my dad, I think she'd skip dinner altogether. She mostly
wants soup. In the evening, she'll have a cup or tea or coffee, but not
much else unless there's company and she serves dessert, and then she'll
have a few bites. I have recently talked to her about discussing her lack
of appetite with her doctor, but she thinks it's after effects of a long
passed gastric episode (6 weeks ago). She says she just don't like food
much anymore. She still takes vitamins and she's on medication for
cholesterol, blood thinners, and something for blood pressure.

Does this sound like something serious? Would you insist on talking to the
doctor? Or wait and see what happens?

Thanks in advance,

kimberly

Older people often lose their appetite. Sometimes the food just doesn't
taste like it used to.

I'm only 48 and am going through some similar issues myself, although not as
extreme as your mom. I have food allergies which limits what I can eat.
Also have diabetes and diabetic gastroparesis. That means I might throw up
if I do eat! And the gastroparesis diet limits me even further. I am
overweight though so I can use that as an excuse when I don't want to eat.
Doesn't seem to help with the weight loss though. I take vitamins and was
recommended by my naturopath that I take some Super Algae capsules for added
nutrition.

Is your mom losing weight? Or has she lost too much weight? If not, I
wouldn't worry about it too much. Especially if she isn't very active.
People need less calories as they age.

"Dee Dee" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

I'm not even suggesting this is the case in your case; but just ruminating
about my m-i-l who first stopped drinking coffee, after drinking it all
her life from morning until night, when she started at the beginning of
dementia/Alzheimers. Later it dwindled down to eating almost nothing.
When we visited, all of our meals were at restaurants; she would maybe eat
a spoonful of this or that. But at one of the places we ate, there were
free-hand-out cookies at the register (packaged, of course, for Janet),
and she would always practically skip to those cookies on the way out.

But, she had been a fussy eater all her life; I don't think she had ever
gained an ounce.
Dee Dee

I had a friend with Alzheimer's. His eating was horrible. He might eat a
whole meal three times in rapid succession because he'd forgotten that he
had just eaten. Or he might go for days without eating because he thought
he already ate. Can be tough.

"Nexis" <[email hidden]> wrote in message

Quoted message said:

My worry is this: Lately, she doesn't like to eat. She used to love
breakfast, now she is not interested. She makes food and goes to
restaurants, but eats about what a small (and I mean 1-2 yr old) child
would eat, and not much else. She doesn't eat anything before 11 am or so
(though she's up at 4 am), and has a bowl of soup around

Quoted message said:

Does this sound like something serious? Would you insist on talking to the
doctor? Or wait and see what happens?

It may be serious. Considering all the medication she is taking, it could be
a form of depression also. Get her checked out.

The message <[email hidden]>
from "Nexis" <[email hidden]> contains these words:

Quoted message said:

Does this sound like something serious?

Yes, prolonged loss of appetite, and a new preference for liquid or
mushy food, are both potentially serious warning signs which need to be
investigated ASAP. It's not unusual for people to be so frozen by fears
of cancer, etc, and what it will do to their partner and children, that
they pretend all is well and won't take themselves to the doctor.You
may need to gently relieve her of that burden by insisting on making a
Dr appointment for her and taking her there.

Quoted message said:

Would you insist on talking to the doctor?

Relatives can't insist on being present at an adults consult if the
patient refuses; but I'd play that by ear when you get her there.
Meanwhile there is nothing in patient/Dr confidentiality , to prevent
you putting all your concerns/observations verbally or in writing to
the DR, before he sees your mother.

Don't wait any longer. If there is a serious problem, early
intervention can make a huge difference to the outcome. If it's nothing,
you will all be relieved of worry. Also, it's important your mother can
be helped and monitored to avoid poor nutrition causing serious health
problems.

Janet

"Edwin Pawlowski" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

"Nexis" <[email hidden]> wrote in message

Quoted message said:

My worry is this: Lately, she doesn't like to eat. She used to love
breakfast, now she is not interested. She makes food and goes to
restaurants, but eats about what a small (and I mean 1-2 yr old) child
would eat, and not much else. She doesn't eat anything before 11 am or so
(though she's up at 4 am), and has a bowl of soup around

Quoted message said:

Does this sound like something serious? Would you insist on talking to
the doctor? Or wait and see what happens?

It may be serious. Considering all the medication she is taking, it could
be a form of depression also. Get her checked out.

When I first read the post, I thought it might be a form of depression as
well. You may wish to have her checked out, if she balks, tell her it's for
YOUR peace of mind. Call ahead to make the appointment and if possible, ask
that her doctor call you back before hand, or make arrangements to speak
with him prior to your mother's seeing him. Explain your concerns and ask
that he give her a thorough going over and check her mental status as well
(sometimes how they 'feel' mentally isn't checked like how they 'feel'
physically). He may balk at giving you a full diagnosis due to the whole
HIPPA thing, but tell him you will tell him what you have noticed and he can
take it from there. Depression is treatable and I would look at that as a
possibility before Alzheimers, but in any case, get her a thorough physical.
It may be as simple as one med conflicting with another, so changing them
around could make a world of difference.
-ginny

Nexis said:

Ok, before anyone lectures, I'm not asking for medical advice, just opinions on if
this is really something to worry about or if I'm reading too much into it.

My mom is someone who lives a "healthy lifestyle" and has for decades. When I was a
kid, as the medical world began to evolve, we discovered that cholesterol problems
and heart disease were a problem in my mom's family. She ate right, exercised every
day but Sunday, took supplements, etc. She was lucky in that she didn't like alot of
things that are most people's weakness...i.e. chocolate, most sweets, etc.

A few years ago, she had some problems with shortness of breath & dizziness. 2 days
later she was having a quintuple bypass. She recovered very well, and was soon back
to her busy and active self.

My worry is this: Lately, she doesn't like to eat. She used to love breakfast, now
she is not interested. She makes food and goes to restaurants, but eats about what a
small (and I mean 1-2 yr old) child would eat, and not much else. She doesn't eat
anything before 11 am or so (though she's up at 4 am), and has a bowl of soup around
3 pm or so, and if it wasn't for my dad, I think she'd skip dinner altogether. She
mostly wants soup. In the evening, she'll have a cup or tea or coffee, but not much
else unless there's company and she serves dessert, and then she'll have a few bites.
I have recently talked to her about discussing her lack of appetite with her doctor,
but she thinks it's after effects of a long passed gastric episode (6 weeks ago). She
says she just don't like food much anymore. She still takes vitamins and she's on
medication for cholesterol, blood thinners, and something for blood pressure.

Does this sound like something serious? Would you insist on talking to the doctor? Or
wait and see what happens?

Thanks in advance,

kimberly

So sorry to hear about your mom. I hope she improves quickly. The
problem with your mom is potentially serious, but only a doctor or nurse
can say so with an examination and labwork. It'd probably be best to
consult the doc as soon as possible.

On the other hand, however, perhaps her current eating habits might be
due to something as simple as her sense of smell/taste has altered or
disappeared. My grandmother had that problem - she'd lost her sense of
smell/taste and eating properly became a definite chore for her since
she no longer enjoyed the foods.

Sky

--
Ultra Ultimate Kitchen Rule - Use the Timer!
Ultimate Kitchen Rule -- Cook's Choice

Virginia Tadrzynski said:

"Edwin Pawlowski" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

"Nexis" <[email hidden]> wrote in message

Quoted message said:

My worry is this: Lately, she doesn't like to eat. She used to love
breakfast, now she is not interested. She makes food and goes to
restaurants, but eats about what a small (and I mean 1-2 yr old)
child would eat, and not much else. She doesn't eat anything before
11 am or so (though she's up at 4 am), and has a bowl of soup around

Does this sound like something serious? Would you insist on talking
to the doctor? Or wait and see what happens?

It may be serious. Considering all the medication she is taking, it
could be a form of depression also. Get her checked out.

When I first read the post, I thought it might be a form of
depression as well. You may wish to have her checked out, if she
balks, tell her it's for YOUR peace of mind. Call ahead to make the
appointment and if possible, ask that her doctor call you back before
hand, or make arrangements to speak with him prior to your mother's
seeing him. Explain your concerns and ask that he give her a
thorough going over and check her mental status as well (sometimes
how they 'feel' mentally isn't checked like how they 'feel'
physically). He may balk at giving you a full diagnosis due to the
whole HIPPA thing

-ginny

When HIPPA was first signed into law, the first time I saw my doctor I had
to complete forms indicating to whom they could release medical information.
Most likely Kimberly's mom had to do the same thing at her doctor's office.
If she didn't list Kimberly as someone to be allowed access she should see
if her mom will amend that.

When my mom was in the hospital a while ago they didn't ask her to fill out
HIPPA forms, I guess because she was admitted through the ER. When we
raised the subject she didn't know what HIPPA was. And she frankly didn't
want to think about or be bothered with asking one of the nurses or her
doctor. So we didn't really know what was going on.

To Kimberly, I'd definitely see if you can get her in for a check-up.
Depression could be the answer and a lot of times people don't even realize
they are depressed.

OTOH, it could also be something as simple as a waning appetite as she gets
older. To everyone else it appears my mom doesn't eat enough. But her
doctor has found no physical cause and is not concerned.

Jill

"Goomba38" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Nexis said:

My worry is this: Lately, she doesn't like to eat. She used to love

<snip>

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

Does this sound like something serious? Would you insist on talking to the doctor?
Or wait and see what happen

Has she admitted to or have you noticed a weight loss? What exactly was the gastric
"episode" she experienced weeks ago?
Otherwise, anorexia could obviously be a sign of many problems. I would suggest a
visit to her GP.

No weight loss to speak of so far. The gastric thing was a stomach bug, nausea and
feeling lousy for about a week. She's not anorexic, at least I don't think so. She
doesn't fixate on her weight or feel she needs to lose any. She's just lost interest
in food in general.

Thanks,

kimberly

Nexis said:

Ok, before anyone lectures, I'm not asking for medical advice, just
opinions on if this is really something to worry about or if I'm
reading too much into it.

My mom is someone who lives a "healthy lifestyle" and has for
decades. When I was a kid, as the medical world began to evolve, we
discovered that cholesterol problems and heart disease were a problem
in my mom's family. She ate right, exercised every day but Sunday,
took supplements, etc. She was lucky in that she didn't like alot of
things that are most people's weakness...i.e. chocolate, most sweets,
etc.

A few years ago, she had some problems with shortness of breath &
dizziness. 2 days later she was having a quintuple bypass. She
recovered very well, and was soon back to her busy and active self.

My worry is this: Lately, she doesn't like to eat. She used to love
breakfast, now she is not interested. She makes food and goes to
restaurants, but eats about what a small (and I mean 1-2 yr old)
child would eat, and not much else. She doesn't eat anything before
11 am or so (though she's up at 4 am), and has a bowl of soup around
3 pm or so, and if it wasn't for my dad, I think she'd skip dinner
altogether. She mostly wants soup. In the evening, she'll have a cup
or tea or coffee, but not much else unless there's company and she
serves dessert, and then she'll have a few bites. I have recently
talked to her about discussing her lack of appetite with her doctor,
but she thinks it's after effects of a long passed gastric episode (6
weeks ago). She says she just don't like food much anymore. She still
takes vitamins and she's on medication for cholesterol, blood
thinners, and something for blood pressure.

Does this sound like something serious? Would you insist on talking
to the doctor? Or wait and see what happens?

Thanks in advance,

I would insist on talking to the doctor.

--
Dan Goodman
"You, each of you, have some special wild cards. Play with them.
Find out what makes you different and better. Because it is there,
if only you can find it." Vernor Vinge, _Rainbows End_
Journal http://dsgood.livejournal.com
Futures http://dangoodman.livejournal.com
mirror: http://dsgood.insanejournal.com
Links http://del.icio.us/dsgood

jmcquown said:

When HIPPA was first signed into law, the first time I saw my doctor I had
to complete forms indicating to whom they could release medical information.
Most likely Kimberly's mom had to do the same thing at her doctor's office.
If she didn't list Kimberly as someone to be allowed access she should see
if her mom will amend that.

When my mom was in the hospital a while ago they didn't ask her to fill out
HIPPA forms, I guess because she was admitted through the ER. When we
raised the subject she didn't know what HIPPA was. And she frankly didn't
want to think about or be bothered with asking one of the nurses or her
doctor. So we didn't really know what was going on.

To Kimberly, I'd definitely see if you can get her in for a check-up.
Depression could be the answer and a lot of times people don't even realize
they are depressed.

OTOH, it could also be something as simple as a waning appetite as she gets
older. To everyone else it appears my mom doesn't eat enough. But her
doctor has found no physical cause and is not concerned.

Jill

First off, it is HIPAA, not HIPPA. It doesn't affect your mom getting
information about her own condition directly if she asks right there
while getting cared for.
The HIPAA laws protect patient information from being disclosed to
others who have no right or need to know. And you'd be shocked to hear
some of the instances I've experienced on people seeking information
that have *no* business hearing it! Trauma-Drama, we call it, lol.
If your mom asked for information about her own condition to a health
care provider while you're standing right there, I might ask her if she
wants me to tell you too or perhaps I'll just assume her bringing it up
implies she has no problems with you hearing the answer, but signing
some piece of paper is just a way to alert the patient to the law and
cover the hospitals ass later should something be questioned about
privacy. That piece of signed paper isn't required.

As for the OP's mom- depression is a very real possibility and pretty
common in the elderly. But as has been mentioned also, taste buds also
diminish over time and often affect the pleasure of eating. Sweet foods
are often most enjoyed as that is the taste least (or lastly) lost.
But I've also seen many patients who slowly lose their appetite because
slow growing tumors are compressing the stomach and leading to a false
sense of fullness, or other illnesses which affect appetite. So she
really does need a full work up.

jmcquown said:

When HIPPA was first signed into law, the first time I saw my doctor I had
to complete forms indicating to whom they could release medical information.
Most likely Kimberly's mom had to do the same thing at her doctor's office.
If she didn't list Kimberly as someone to be allowed access she should see
if her mom will amend that.

When my mom was in the hospital a while ago they didn't ask her to fill out
HIPPA forms, I guess because she was admitted through the ER. When we
raised the subject she didn't know what HIPPA was. And she frankly didn't
want to think about or be bothered with asking one of the nurses or her
doctor. So we didn't really know what was going on.

To Kimberly, I'd definitely see if you can get her in for a check-up.
Depression could be the answer and a lot of times people don't even realize
they are depressed.

OTOH, it could also be something as simple as a waning appetite as she gets
older. To everyone else it appears my mom doesn't eat enough. But her
doctor has found no physical cause and is not concerned.

Jill

First off, it is HIPAA, not HIPPA. It doesn't affect your mom getting
information about her own condition directly if she asks right there
while getting cared for.
The HIPAA laws protect patient information from being disclosed to
others who have no right or need to know. And you'd be shocked to hear
some of the instances I've experienced on people seeking information
that have *no* business hearing it! Trauma-Drama, we call it, lol.
If your mom asked for information about her own condition to a health
care provider while you're standing right there, I might ask her if she
wants me to tell you too or perhaps I'll just assume her bringing it up
implies she has no problems with you hearing the answer, but signing
some piece of paper is just a way to alert the patient to the law and
cover the hospitals ass later should something be questioned about
privacy. That piece of signed paper isn't required.

As for the OP's mom- depression is a very real possibility and pretty
common in the elderly. But as has been mentioned also, taste buds also
diminish over time and often affect the pleasure of eating. Sweet foods
are often most enjoyed as that is the taste least (or lastly) lost.
But I've also seen many patients who slowly lose their appetite because
slow growing tumors are compressing the stomach and leading to a false
sense of fullness, or other illnesses which affect appetite. So she
really does need a full work up.