"ROTB" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...
Quoted message said:I was wondering if anyone at ARBR has ever met "The Great" Ed Dolan. If
you have, what's he look like? And if you've ever spoken with him,
what's his real-life personality like?
For the rest of us, I think it would be fun if everyone described what
you THINK Ed looks like, as you read his daily rants. Here's the person
I picture when I read his inanities:
A short guy with stubby legs and arms and a pot-belly (not really a fat
guy, just a protruding beer-gut, or rather, "Livingston Cellars Red
Rose gut"😉. In short, gnome-like. I would have pictured a full beard,
but we all know how he hates facial hair, so we must assume he keeps
himself clean-shaven. He has a perpetual scowl on his face, and the
only time he looks satisfied is when he's out zooming around town on
his 'bent, or in the evening when he unscrews the cap on the Livingston
bottle. After he sets himself down in front of his computer with a big
Welch's Grape Jelly jar full of Livingston, and fires up ARBR, he gets
a gleefully sinister look on his face as he punches out his latest
posts with those short, stubby two index fingers. After a few glasses
of the magic elixer, and six or seven "brilliant bon mots" fired away
into cyberspace, he shuts down the computer and leans back in his easy
chair, another day of Saintliness having come to its glorious end.
How 'bout you? What do you picture as you read Ed's screeds?
--ROTB
Oh, Oh ... ROTB is not too far from wrong.
The fact is that I am getting a slight pot belly now that I am getting old
and getting ready to die. But I have been a string bean all of my life. To
tell the truth, I enjoy looking at my slight pot belly as it is just so
unlike me. Well, I figure now there is just more of me to love.
I think you would find my personality likable. I get along well with
everyone because I am so much smarter than everyone else. Therefore, it is
easy for me to stoop to their low level and get their approval. But make no
mistake about it. I consider myself infinitely superior to all others. I
only stoop to conquer. Nothing gives me more pleasure than to disdain my
inferiors. The trick is not to let them know that I disdain them.
I do not understand your prejudice against Livingston Cellars Red Rose. It
is the cheapest wine in the world and it is also the best. But it takes a
genius like me to figure this out. Most folks go through life thinking that
what you get is what you pay for. But I know that is not true. There are
bargains galore but you have to give up your prejudices in order to find
them. I now shop exclusively at Wal-Mart where everyone knows the prices are
always the lowest. And I show great disdain for the clerks who as everyone
knows are treated like [censored] by Wal-Mart management. Who cares? All I care
about are the low prices.
As for the perpetual scowl, that is a persona that I only wear on ARBR
because of all the idiots that I encounter here. Top posters will bring out
the worst in me a well as those who call me names.Tom Sherman, as much as I
hated him, was at least worthy of me. Now there is nothing left but midgets
and dwarfs, idiots and scoundrels, morons and imbeciles, jackasses and
[censored], etc. I think you get the drift.
Last winter ARBR was destroyed by a criminal vandal troll. I did my best to
fight the good fight, but the rest of the group took to the tall grass. Ever
since that episode, I don't much give a damn what goes on here. Cowards and
scoundrels do not deserve a good newsgroup.
Ed Dolan the Great - Minnesota
