Happy New Year !
THE LEGEND - true story/ adapted
A middle age gentleman was travelling in a train full of people .
He was dressed in a clean-cut military type uniform, his face showing a
terrible scar.
His steely eyes were cutting through the moving humans when a young man
stoped just in front of him; rings in his nose, ears, all the fingers,
dressed in many coloured, dirty, smelly clothes, a thick smoke coming
out of his mouth.
Near his body was the Ultimax [censored] Unicycle.
The soldier/ officer looked at the young sports junkie and had a
daytime dream: the young dirty man/ piece of nothing holding with one
hand his Ultimax [censored] Geared Unicycle and with the other hand the hand
of the soldier’s beloved daughter, booby Bombolina.
I want to marry your daughter, said the young unicyclist loser to her
father/ soldier/ officer.
One moment, replied the old man, let me bring my glasses to see you
better; once he was inside, he called Special Occasions Group, to
deliver at his house a 10 tonnes block of bricks, job done in an
instant, also downloading it on the little unicyclist’s head.
Fantastic error: the Ultimax [censored] Geared Unicycle, owned by the little
unicyclist/ future son in law was 10 tonnes block of bricks proof.
By visualising all these things, a smile flourished on the officer’s
face, even his terrible scar was smiling, a frightening picture,
reflections of deep, intense, extraordinary life experiences.
What the hell are you starring at me and smile, old man, you have never
seen modern/ colourful/ special designed/ customised dresses in your
life ? asked the smelly/ junky unicyclist.
Young unicyclist man, I believe that you are about 18- 20 years old.
In those times, when you came on this planet, I was a Freedom Fighter/
mercenary, going places all over the world to fight the rebels,
perpetual enemies who hate us and our way of life because we are free,
so my missions were to teach/ implement democracy, how to sell away
their children, parents, pedofile+ing, [censored]+ ing, Nation/ Country,
culture, traditions, spirituality, customs, resources, dobbing each
other, etc, and get a good price on the free market, it is called
evolution, revolution, dilution, delusion, progress, total/ absolute
freedom.
One night, in the jungle, a very powerful feeling/ noble sentiment
gave me a state of unbearable stress; everywhere I was going to fight
the universal enemies, I had with me a small cage carrying my best/
favourite/ only/ real friend, my mascot, a colourful parrot.
He learnt very fast, by himself, how to ride a Mini - Ultimax [censored]
Geared Unicycle.
Then, the unthinkable happened: imagining/ visualising that my wife/ my
girlfriend were with me in the jungle, although in those time I did not
have a wife or girlfriend, I lost my concentration/ determination as
Freedom Fighter and had an intense, very intimate encounter/ my biggest
sin of my life with my best/ the only/ true/ friend/ the parrot, who
saved my life many times when the anti-freedom warriors were
approaching riding on their ordinary/ non-geared unicycles.
Young unicyclist loser/ piece of [censored], I kept my big secret with me all
these years; looking at how you are dressed, like a clown- parrot
unicyclist, for a moment I believed that you are my forgotten son, now
a grown unicyclist man.
If that is the case, I welcome you my son, if not, would you like to
meet my beloved daughter, booby Bombolina, I promised her to find a
nice gentleman, the future of the Nation, World, to respect/ love/ feed
her.
She is 16 now, 130 kg and 156 cm tall, ideal match for you, 190 cm
tall.
Sorry, old man, but I am engaged, said the young unicyclist
good-for-nothing/ one unicycle-one-vote/ one future- no future, the
new, modern man; he touched his Ultimate [censored] Geared Unicycle so
tenderly that the old mercenary understood everything.
By the time the young unicyclist and nothing else now or in the future
disappeared around the corner, the HERO/ lonely wolf/ mercenary/
Freedom Fighter was a broken man: he just missed a chance in a life
time, the perfect husband for Bombolina.
He bought from the nearest unicycle shop the ULTIMATE [censored] GEARED
UNICYCLE - THE LEGEND and rode away at high speed for the rest of his
life, the unicycle dealer did not tell him how to stop.
The HERO was seen ghosting on his THE LEGEND unicycle on William
Street / Sydney, at the intersection with Bourke Street, where his
beloved Bombolina was working hard, not far away from Kings Cross/ how
much?; the HERO felt proud, his daughter had a full time job, life had
a meaning in the new world.
Also riding the waves in Bondi/ the geared system could be used as a
paddle wheel drive system for small human powered boats.
After a wile, sick and tired to live in the perfect/ absolutely free
society where every human being, objects/ thoughts had identical
rights, due to the Politically Correct Industry, the HERO has done the
best/ greatest thing in his life: he died/ as a Hero/ Freedom Fighter
forever.
When the experts/ doctors removed his micro-chips from his brain,
sexual reproductive organ, shoulders, etc, they notice a strange
phenomenon: although the HERO was dead, he become more human now, than
he was alive.
They had to remove the micro-chips from his Ultimate [censored] Geared
Unicycle The Legend.
All these things/ rumours grew and grew and grew, inevitably becoming
reality/ religion.
Now, the new generations of Freedom Fighters were fighting in the name
of THE HERO and his ULTIMATE [censored] GEARED UNICYCLE - THE LEGEND.
This is a true story, if some characters look familiar, then…
Good luck !
--
dakoroman
------------------------------------------------------------------------
dakoroman's Profile: http://www.unicyclist.com/profile/16388
View this thread: http://www.unicyclist.com/thread/66945
Posted Via Usenet.com Premium Usenet Newsgroup Services
----------------------------------------------------------
** SPEED ** RETENTION ** COMPLETION ** ANONYMITY **
----------------------------------------------------------
http://www.usenet.com