This just in. . .

lucky it wasn't a bee!

"Pat" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...
:
: "Donn Deniston" : Grasshopper+chin+20mph= OUCH!
: :
: : Discuss.
:
: Sorry about that chin, dude. Reminds me of a grasshopper story.
Big sucker
: flew up and landed right in one of my helmet vents. At the
time, it made a
: lot of sense to me to smack it with my left hand. After I got
through the
: wild ride in the bar ditch and back on the pavement, I had a
little talk
: with myself....
:
: Pat in TX
: :
: :
:
:

"mo fo" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...
: lucky it wasn't a bee!

The year before last at the Hotter 'n' Hell Hundred, I was riding alongside
a British chap. He spotted one of those huge West Texas grasshoppers and
turned to me and asked if they were poisonous....

Pat in TX

Donn Deniston said:

Grasshopper+chin+20mph= OUCH!

Discuss.

Hope the grasshopper was wearing a helmet!

"Bill Sornson" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Donn Deniston said:

Grasshopper+chin+20mph= OUCH!

Discuss.

Hope the grasshopper was wearing a helmet!

shhh!

"Pat" wrote

Quoted message said:

The year before last at the Hotter 'n' Hell Hundred, I was riding
alongside
a British chap. He spotted one of those huge West Texas grasshoppers and
turned to me and asked if they were poisonous....

Pat in TX

So what did you tell him?
--
mark

"Donn Deniston" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Grasshopper+chin+20mph= OUCH!

Discuss.

Could have been worse. Could have been:

grasshopper + open mouth + 20 MPH = swallow

--
----
Joe S.

In article <[email hidden]>,

Joe S. said:

"Donn Deniston" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Grasshopper+chin+20mph= OUCH!

Discuss.

Could have been worse. Could have been:

grasshopper + open mouth + 20 MPH = swallow

This is all making faired recumbents increasingly attractive
to me. I've had my full share of bug collisions, including
a swarm of baby spiders, dragonflies resoundingly bouncing
off my h*lm*t, bees that decide to light on my face and do
some leisurely exploratory walkin' around, and an whole
bunch of near-ingestings. And a few consummated ones.

I recall listening to a guy on a local radio talk show;
he did an Ironman along the north coast of Australia.
He mentioned these humongous spiders that love to drop
off overhanging branches, onto cyclists' shoulders.
From his description I gather steppin' on one of those
would leave remains about the same size, shape and
consistency of a stepped-on Swedish meatball. Maybe
with the similar or greater stickiness on the sole of
your shoe.

The cycling lifestyle ain't always easy. Especially when
bugs luv ya. I'm just glad I don't live in scorpion country,
or they'd be nestling inside my gloves or sumpthin'.

cheers,
Tom

--
-- Nothing is safe from me.
Above address is just a spam midden.
I'm really at: tkeats [curlicue] vcn [point] bc [point] ca

mark said:

"Pat" wrote

Quoted message said:

The year before last at the Hotter 'n' Hell Hundred, I was riding
alongside
a British chap. He spotted one of those huge West Texas grasshoppers and
turned to me and asked if they were poisonous....

Pat in TX

So what did you tell him?

The giant tarrantulas (mostly nocturnal) thrive on West Texas
grasshoppers so there's virtually no need to worry about them.

: > The year before last at the Hotter 'n' Hell Hundred, I was riding
: > alongside
: > a British chap. He spotted one of those huge West Texas grasshoppers and
: > turned to me and asked if they were poisonous....
: >
: > Pat in TX

: So what did you tell him?
: --
: mark

Hey, I didn't take advantage of him! I told him they weren't poisonous but
not to smack them when they landed on the helmet....

Pat in TX
:
:

"Bill Sornson" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Donn Deniston said:

Grasshopper+chin+20mph= OUCH!

Discuss.

Hope the grasshopper was wearing a helmet!

It sure felt like he was. Of course, statistically speaking, it would have
done the little critter no good at all.

🙂

"Tom Keats" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

In article <[email hidden]>,

Joe S. said:

"Donn Deniston" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Grasshopper+chin+20mph= OUCH!

Discuss.

Could have been worse. Could have been:

grasshopper + open mouth + 20 MPH = swallow

This is all making faired recumbents increasingly attractive
to me. I've had my full share of bug collisions, including
a swarm of baby spiders, dragonflies resoundingly bouncing
off my h*lm*t, bees that decide to light on my face and do
some leisurely exploratory walkin' around, and an whole
bunch of near-ingestings. And a few consummated ones.

I recall listening to a guy on a local radio talk show;
he did an Ironman along the north coast of Australia.
He mentioned these humongous spiders that love to drop
off overhanging branches, onto cyclists' shoulders.
From his description I gather steppin' on one of those
would leave remains about the same size, shape and
consistency of a stepped-on Swedish meatball. Maybe
with the similar or greater stickiness on the sole of
your shoe.

The cycling lifestyle ain't always easy. Especially when
bugs luv ya. I'm just glad I don't live in scorpion country,
or they'd be nestling inside my gloves or sumpthin'.

cheers,
Tom

there's nothing quite like missing a turn on the dirt track and crashing
through some blackberries only to come out the other side covered in nasty
big-[censored] garden spiders!
followed by a very athletic leap off the bike and dance something like the
pogo from the olden days done hyper-drive. it seems that if you pull all of
the web away the spider will come too! gives me the creeps just thinking
about it.

Grasshopper+chin+20mph= OUCH!
Discuss.
======================================
Sometimes you're the Windshield. and somtimes you're the Bug. Mark

"Donn Deniston" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Grasshopper+chin+20mph= OUCH!

Discuss.

Well, I had a wasp fly into the vents on my helmit once.
I could feel and hear her buzzing around in there too.
I prayed that she wouldn't take offense and let me have it.
Later it was quiet, so when I stopped there was the sheer terror and agony
of carefully pulling off my helmit, fortunately for me, the wasp had flown
away.
Mucho relief there.

Lately, on my commute to work at dawn. there is a two mile stretch of road
where the gnats are flying in swarms.
Man it is tough to try to not breathe for two miles while you are pedaling
at 20mph.
Then also hoping to not get one in your eye too.
I guess I'll really have to consider them fresh protein for an early
breakfast.

Donn Deniston said:

"Bill Sornson" <[email hidden]> wrote in
message news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Donn Deniston said:

Grasshopper+chin+20mph= OUCH!

Discuss.

Hope the grasshopper was wearing a helmet!

It sure felt like he was. Of course, statistically speaking, it
would have done the little critter no good at all.

Here we go...

Quoted message said:

🙂

OK, that helps 🙂

Mark D said:

Grasshopper+chin+20mph= OUCH!
Discuss.
======================================
Sometimes you're the Windshield. and somtimes you're the Bug. Mark

You know what's the last thing a bug sees when it hits a windshield?

Its ass.

(Or something like that.)

Bill "punchline challenged" S.

What's the last thing that goes through a bugs mind when he hits your
windshield?

CC said:

What's the last thing that goes through a bugs mind when he hits your
windshield?

Dammit!

Thanks 🙂

Donn Deniston said:

Grasshopper+chin+20mph= OUCH!

Discuss.

Bumblebee+nosebridge+45mph=skidding blind downhill