What an amazing event!
My day started at 10 AM when I hopped on a train to get to Nottingham.
Having arrived there Matt (Tolliday) picked me up from the station and
we drove to his passing signs to the legendary watersports centre.
"Aha, we're in Fule country" I thought. I'd have liked to go and look
at the place so I could picture Mike's write ups in my head a little
better but unfortunately time didn't allow.
We got our gear organised and then were driven to Cambridge station by
Matt's dad. From there we caught a train to Nodnol and then made our
way to the start point for the ride, a pub in a park in Hackney,
handily named 'The pub at the Park.' When we arrived there were heaps
of lycra clad two wheeled types lounging about, sipping beer and
swapping stories of Dynamo's past. We ended up chatting to a very jolly
fixie rider from Devon and a nice lady from Sith Ifrika.
We ummed and ahh'd for a bit as to whether to wait for the guy to turn
up with the route sheets or just set off and make use of the map print
outs Matt had prepared. After we'd ummed and ahh'd long enough to drink
a beer or two it was 7.30 and we decided to just head off as we wanted
an early start so as not to be overtaken too early.
So off we went. I was a bit anxious about riding through London traffic
having never done so before but it was actually alright, stopping here
and there to check we were on the right track we made it to the M25 in
good time. It was around here when we saw the first riders, a couple of
recumbant types. We then continued on to Epping Forest where the first
of a steady stream of riders and morale boosting comments came past
us.
We'd been warned that Epping could be a bit dodgy with lots of drunken
people generally causing hassle but we got through hassle free and soon
afterwards the traffic began to thin out a bit. Later on I was having a
chat with a chap who'd had a rock thrown at him in Epping and was
expressing the wish to stove in his burberry clad head.
It was getting dark now and we stopped to switch on our blinky red
lights to avoid being run over though it was still light enough for me
to keep my aviators on. We stopped at a garage round here so that I
could get some spare batteries for the speaker to my mp3 player.
By and by we turned off the A road we'd been on for a good while and
saw the first of the t-lights in a jam jar laid out to reassure us
nocturnal pilgrims we were on the right track.
We kept ourselves amused throughout the ride with a game we dubbed
'Roadkill Bingo,' a point a piece for the first man to spot an ex
mammal or bird and an instant win if you saw a snake. I took an early
lead but was soon overtaken by Matt's eagle eyes. This game got harder
as it got darker but the morning saw a revival of our interest in
snuffed stuff in the gutter.
When it had gotten dark proper we stopped at a pub to refill our water
and to get the rolling disco up and running. I'd brought my MP3 player
with a battery powered speaker to keep us entertained along the way so
on we spun to the strains of Jack Johnson, Rage Against the Machine and
John Butler amongst other stuff. Some of the bikers slowed down and
rode with us for a while so they could listen to the music. I'm really
rather glad we had the choons to keep our minds occupied.
It was around that point when someone told me they'd heard a woman had
been hit by a car around Epping somewhere it was only when I'd got home
yesterday I heard the sad news that in fact a man had been hit head on
by a van and had been killed.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/essex/5162602.stm
We'd covered the first 30 miles or so in good time, the Assos cream was
doing it's job and we were feeling good about making the halfway point
in good time. However we started to slow down quite a bit after this
point and our crotch stops became more frequent. I found it necessary
to stop using the Assos cream which is good for preventing chafing and
move on to vaseline which I find good for once you are actually feeling
sore.
Most of the rest of the ride up to the feeding station at 65 miles is a
bit of a blur now, fatigue does funny things to you. It began raining
at at some point whilst it was still dark and we found a Chicagoan chap
called Saiid who'd become lost. He wasn't having a great time of it,
he'd been roped into doing the ride by his boss and had lost him along
the way. He rode with us most of the way to the food station where he
called it a day.
At about 60 miles I started feeling pretty [censored], I knew that I was
hungry but not even the Soreen appealed to me. The saddle soreness was
becoming an issue too and our stops were becoming really quite
frequent. I'd started the ride wearing bib shorts and another pair over
the top but I took off the second pair about 20 miles in when I
realised they were only making things worse by bunching up and rubbing
in tender places.
We made it to the food station at about 5.30 It was raining really
heavily so we stayed there 'til about 7. I put on my arm and leg
warmers and doezed off for a bit. We set off again but I didn't last
too much longer after here. I ended up stopping in a village called
Little Tittyflop or something similar while Matt carried on. He'd
called his dad to let him know where I was so he could come and pick me
up. In the intervening time I plonked myself on a bench on the village
green and put my headphones on.
This was real Daily Mail country and I was expecting to be moved on by
an irate local thinking I was the advance vanguard of a group of
travellers. Instead, happily enough, a really lovely lady came out of
her house and asked if I was OK. Yup was the answer. She then asked if
I'd been riding all night, again yup was the answer. She then asked me
if I wanted a cup of tea... Oh lord. Yes, yes I did. They'd run out of
tea and coffee by the time we'd got to the feeding station so I was
absolutely gagging for a brew.
She sat with me until Matt's dad arrived in the car and we had a chat
about the ride and about Little Tittyflop and what a lovely place it
was to live. She wasn't what I'd have expected a resident of this place
to be like. She introduced herself as Muff and pointed out her car
which was covered in pink heart decals and had the word "Muff"
emblazoned on the windscreen above the driver's seat. Hooray for
oddballs in posh places.
After using her toilet I hopped into Matt's dads car and we drove on to
where Matt was. He'd covered another 5 miles in the time I'd been
drinking tea and chatting. He was still keen to get to the end but time
constraints and practicalities were the enemy. Hats off to Matt for
having the fitness and general chutzpah for wanting to continue. My
fitness levels simply weren't up to scratch but then I wasn't really
expecting them to be after only agreeing to do the ride a week and a
half in advance.
So that was that, I managed about 70-75 miles and Matt another 5 on top
of that and could have done more. We breakfasted chez Little Chef and
then drove back to Nottingham. As you'd expect we didn't stay awake for
the drive back. I managed ot keep myself awake for the train journey
back to Macclesfield but finally dozed off during the football. I've
only just found out what happened in the second half.
Ooh, I nearly forgot about the result of the Roadkill Bingo. Like I
said, I took an early lead with some good spotting of foxes and pigeons
only to be overtaken by Matt's superior sense of sight (and possibly
smell). Matt sealed the deal though when in the morning I heard him cry
'SNAAAKE!' Well blow me, there was one very flat adder on the road,
instant victory for Matt. Well done that man.
--
MrBoogiejuice
---unicycle for Bilious - The Oh-God of hangovers---
Make crumbs not War!
Just blame it on the boogie...
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