Benters, St. Michael's Chamber of Commerce has been hoodwinked by Copperhill Copperheads who outbid
us for The Mother of All Dictators. I'm sad to submit the report below.
~~~al.kubeluis..md.usa.earth.sun.milkyway.virgo.universe..corsa~~~
COPPERHILL TENNESSEE: A group of Ocoee River raft guides and Polk County officials announced today
that they had secured an agreement with Saddam Hussein to seek exile in Polk County Tennessee. We
were able to offer him a very attractive package of land grants ,tax breaks ,and control of several
raft companies to bring him to Polk Co. said Polk County Commissioner Vernon L .McClusky. McClusky
went on to say that Hussein had agreed to build a 2.3 billion dollar Palace and bunker complex along
Goforth Creek in the Ocoee corridor. This will be the largest construction project ever built in
Polk Co and will provide many jobs for local people. Contact was made with Hussein last summer when
one of Hussein's mistresses took a raft trip down the river with long time Ocoee guide Tater Smith.
"We got to talking about how bad things were in Bagdad and how much they all wanted to come to
America," said Smith. "It was just a natural move for me to contact the county and see if we could
work something out." Local officials, always on the lookout for economic development opportunities,
were quick to seize the chance to bring a big spender like Saddam to Polk County . Commissioner
McClusky explained " We hope the Palace is just the start, with his Petroleum extraction experience
it shouldn't be hard to get him interested I in reopening the old copper mines and smelter. " Some
local residents are not so enthusiastic, Many are worried about having a neighbor who has such a bad
reputation in the International Community. Local raft guides are also concerned, "We are afraid of
some of the harsh measures he may impose on the guides" stated Chad Bongwater head guide at Cherokee
Rafted. Guides are also unhappy about Saddam's plans to put a large image of himself on all of his
rafts and buses. Other residents were taking the longer view. Said Ocoee river Ranger Lance Morrow"
I think it could be a positive move. A brutal strongman like Saddam could be just the thing to bring
discipline to Ocoee boaters."