road kill

In article <[email hidden]>,

Gonzalez said:

A standard method of suicide in Oxbridge's examination
halls is to stick a pencil up your nose then slam your
face, pencil first, down on the table.

*boggle*

So why do the powers-that-be concern themselves with
such conventional hazards as the tower at my old
college (Girton), which has been known to be closed
around exam time?

Quoted message said:

I have heard that it is a quick and painless
method of killing oneself, but how anyone knows, I
am not quite sure.

Well, if you've witnessed a death without associated agony
...

Quoted message said:

up the hapless squirrel's nose and bang it in hard with a
locally available rock.

A locally-available rock could perhaps take a more
direct approach.

--
Nick Kew

Simonb said:

Callas said:

I cycle with a minimal set of bike tools. I wonder if
it's possible to drive a screwdriver into the animals
brain to provide a quick and painless death?

If I weren't such a coward, I'd wring its neck. Isn't that
the done thing?

Unless you're familiar with handling animals, I'd be wary of
picking up a frightened, in pain and sharp toothed creature
like a squirrel.

Better use your size 10s.

Quoted message said:

Rats are humans biggest enemy after ourselves and viruses.
They are directly responsible for a large amount of 3rd
world poverty, destroying over 60% of crops produced, and
about doubling the cost of food production.

They also destroy biodiversity by waging relentless war on
birds, insects, and other mammals.

Quoted message said:

Kind of. They're like pigeons but they don't [censored] on
your head.

Yeah, but they pollute your food and your environment and
in some cases they spread airborne viruses that are fatal
to humans. Lovely chaps.

Be careful what you wish for.

Eh? Lighten up - I didn't wish for anything. Ps, do you
have some kind of propaganda machine. Your post reads
like you've just tapped in 'rats' and got some vague
propaganda bollocks.

james said:

last night, on the way home, at the top of Greenwich Park
there was an injured grey sqirrel writhing on the road. I
ended up slowing and cycling around it which was what
other traffic was doing. Apart from wondering who was
driving in a park at a junction, in such a way as to run
over a sqirrel (I know they tend towards kamikaze
nuttiness but even so) I didin't do anything for which I
feel rather guilty. I think I should have contacted the
park wardens/parks police office (which is just by there)
in the hope that they might have the means to humanely
dispatch the unhappy creature.

What would anyone else have done

best wishes james

Blood thirsty lot around here, aren't we?!

Not Responding said:

Simon Brooke said:

in message <pMfyc.1509$FY2.12693728@news-
text.cableinet.net>, elyob

(') said:

"Simonb" <[email hidden]>
wrote in message
"]news:[email hidden]...

>james wrote:
>
>
>>What would anyone else have done
>
>Exactly what you did.

Grey squirrels are vermin.

That's no reason to leave it suffering. I would have
cycled over its head and crushed its skull. Death is
inevitable, but suffering is unnecessary.

I would have done this if I thought I wouldn't have some
mad townie try and bring a prosecution for animal cruelty.

Have your heared about Trowbridge's pigeon problem?

Basically, the pigeons are are fast taking over the town,
[censored] in the streets, getting in the way etc.

There's two little old ladies who go about in the evenings
feeding them. No-one can stop them as feeding pigeons aint
against the law.

The town council propose a cull. The Wiltshire Times
reports it.

You know what happens?

People complain!

Anybody out there in URCland like roast pigeon? Come to
Trowbridge with an air rifle and a doggy-bag and get some of
our blasted pigeons!

Please!

"Pete White" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
"]news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

james said:

last night, on the way home, at the top of Greenwich
Park there was an injured grey sqirrel writhing on the
road. I ended up slowing and cycling around it which was
what other traffic was doing. Apart from wondering who
was driving in a park at a junction, in such a way as to
run over a sqirrel (I know they tend towards kamikaze
nuttiness but even so) I didin't do anything for which I
feel rather guilty. I think I should have contacted the
park wardens/parks police office (which is just by
there) in the hope that they might have the means to
humanely dispatch the unhappy creature.

What would anyone else have done

Blood thirsty lot around here, aren't we?!

Just toe the party line and there won't be any trouble.
Start your chant now:

"Death to helmet wearers, death to pavement cyclists, death
to red-light jumpers, death to squirrels, death to buzzards,
death to shops that don't allow bikes, death to the BBC,
death to motorists, death to children, death to safer
cycling courses, death to everyone else that got left out
accidentally."

Repeat every five minutes.
--
"If the outdoors is a gym with dirt on the ground, or a
place to exercise, or to show off, and nothing more, you
don't get it."
- Gary D. Schwartz in rec.backcountry

"Pete White" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
"]news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Anybody out there in URCland like roast pigeon?

Yum :-)

Quoted message said:

Come to Trowbridge with an air rifle

...and be blown away by the antiterrorism squad as an Al
Quaeda supporter.

Quoted message said:

and a doggy-bag and get some of our blasted pigeons!

Hmm. You appear to be confusing wood pigeons (slurp) with
rock pigeons (retch).
--
"Do stairs, stairs, and more stairs, wherever you can
find them."
- Jim Roberts in rec.backcountry

Mark South said:

Just toe the party line and there won't be any trouble.
Start your chant now:

Quoted message said:

"Death to helmet wearers, death to pavement cyclists,
death to red-light jumpers, death to squirrels, death to
buzzards, death to shops that don't allow bikes, death to
the BBC, death to motorists, death to children, death to
safer cycling courses, death to everyone else that got
left out accidentally."

Just for reference, you missed bibshort wearers, users of
sub-£200 bikes, disc brakes that don't require a second
mortgage, and pedestrians. Also anyone who posts to
uk.transport or exceeds speed limits (there may be overlap
in those last two groups)

-dan

--
"please make sure that the person is your friend before
you confirm"

Graeme said:

"Tony B" <[email hidden]> wrote in
:"]news:[email hidden]:

Quoted message said:

Hopefully you don't cross the species barrier with that
philosophy, no doubt there will be a few peeps with
French/Italian surnames hiding from you if you do...

With my mother having the maiden name of Fleming, I'd be
stamping on my own head (I've tried it, I'm not that
flexible). :-)

I should be alright, Kahn being an old Anglo Saxon name
after all.
:-)

--
Dave...

Get a bicycle. You will not regret it. If you live. -
Mark Twain

"Daniel Barlow" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
"]news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Mark South said:

Just toe the party line and there won't be any trouble.
Start your chant now:

Quoted message said:

"Death to helmet wearers, death to pavement cyclists,
death to red-light jumpers, death to squirrels, death to
buzzards, death to shops that don't allow bikes, death
to the BBC, death to motorists, death to children, death
to safer cycling courses, death to everyone else that
got left out accidentally."

Just for reference, you missed bibshort wearers, users of
sub-£200 bikes, disc brakes that don't require a second
mortgage, and pedestrians. Also anyone who posts to
uk.transport or exceeds speed limits (there may be overlap
in those last two groups)

Those were the "everyone else that got left out
accidentally" :-)

There was a time, not so long ago, when the list looked
as if it would also have to include people on non-
recumbent bikes.
--
"To ... just not care that there are naked triathletes
running across your lawn, that's just a waste of
exhibitionism."
- Kibo, in alt.religion.kibology

Reply to Dave Kahn

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

With my mother having the maiden name of Fleming, I'd be
stamping on my own head (I've tried it, I'm not that
flexible). :-)

I should be alright, Kahn being an old Anglo Saxon name
after all.
:-)

Anglo-Saxons? Normans? Romans?

Tchuh - late-comers, the lot of 'em... ;-)

--
Mark, UK. We hope to hear him swear, we love to hear him
squeak, We like to see him biting fingers in his horny beak.

Simon Brooke said:

Bring back the wolf, I says. And I'm not joking.

Wolfs... pha, bring back bears I say.

Mark South said:

"Pete White" <[email hidden]> wrote in
message
"]news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Anybody out there in URCland like roast pigeon?

Yum :-)

Quoted message said:

Come to Trowbridge with an air rifle

...and be blown away by the antiterrorism squad as an Al
Quaeda supporter.

Not around here you won't, Trowbridge has the biggest
Morrocan community outside of London.

On Sat, 12 Jun 2004 18:28:48 +0200, "Mark South"
<[email hidden]> wrote in message
<[email hidden]>:

Quoted message said:

There was a time, not so long ago, when the list looked
as if it would also have to include people on non-
recumbent bikes.

I was of assuming that had already been accepted so went
without saying.

Guy
--
May contain traces of irony. Contents liable to settle after posting.
chapmancentral.co.ukchapmancentral.co.ukOpen ↗

88% of helmet statistics are made up, 65% of them at Washington University

"Just zis Guy, you know?" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
"]news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

On Sat, 12 Jun 2004 18:28:48 +0200, "Mark South"
<[email hidden]> wrote in message
<[email hidden]>:

Quoted message said:

There was a time, not so long ago, when the list looked
as if it would also

have

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

to include people on non-recumbent bikes.

I was of assuming that had already been accepted so went
without saying.

Nice try, but I'm sorry, the syntax in my sentence is still
far clumsier than yours :-)
--
Mark South: World Citizen, Net Denizen

Mark Thompson <[email hidden]> wrote in
:"]news:[email hidden]:

Quoted message said:

People say that as if it makes 'em bad. Rats are lovely
little things. Kind of. They're like pigeons but they
don't [censored] on your head.

We've got some living in our roof space, as do most of our
neighbours apparently (the hazards of living near a creek in
winter). At first we thought it might be a possum as there
was so much noise. The idea of a possum kind of appealed to
me, then I saw a possum in the wild and it looked just like
a massive rat with friendly eyes. I'm sure if I'd have poked
my head up into the roof space and seen one I'd have freaked
at the size of Australian rats and fallen off the ladder :-O

Graeme

Pete White <[email hidden]> wrote in news:40cb0278$0
[email hidden]:

Quoted message said:

Have your heared about Trowbridge's pigeon problem?

Basically, the pigeons are are fast taking over the town,
[censored] in the streets, getting in the way etc.

Sounds like the gull problem in Berwick Upon Tweed (and
probably many other coastal towns). The cull proposal is
raised every few years, and I think it does go ahead (but
has little effect). Round about these times the local paper
is full of soft hearted (& headed) wallies whining about
the sanctity of all life. These are probably the same
numpties who drop their fish and chips all over the place
which is one of the major factors in the gull population
explosion. After you've been crapped on a few times by a
large herring gull, you'd probably be willing to ring their
necks one by one :-/

Graeme

Graeme said:

We've got some living in our roof space, as do most of our
neighbours apparently (the hazards of living near a creek
in winter). At first we thought it might be a possum as
there was so much noise. The idea of a possum kind of
appealed to me, then I saw a possum in the wild and it
looked just like a massive rat with friendly eyes. I'm
sure if I'd have poked my head up into the roof space and
seen one I'd have freaked at the size of Australian rats
and fallen off the ladder :-O

Its said that in London you are never more than 3m away from
a rat (the animal not the human kind who are much more
abundant than that even)

Tony

"Dave Larrington" <[email hidden]> wrote in news:2itj86Fqo2dpU2@uni-
berlin.de:

Quoted message said:

Squirrels are EVIL, kids. Just say no.

I'm down to 15 a day. They say you won't get hooked, but
once you start the craving builds rapidly. I still get
twitchy and hop around the place if I go cold turkey :-/

Graeme

Dave Kahn <[email hidden]> wrote in
:"]news:[email hidden]:

Quoted message said:

I should be alright, Kahn being an old Anglo Saxon name
after all.

What? Old Genghis was Anglo-Saxon was he? That explains
the stroppy attitude of some English football
supporters then :-)

Graeme