In article <[email hidden]>,
Sheldon said:Monsur Fromage du Pollet said:Melba's Jammin' <[email hidden]> wrote in
Quoted message said:Quoted message said:Quoted message said:I'll prepare the breasts that way again, but may instead spread
some salsa on top of at least his, if not mine.
I put a picture on my website.
Quoted message said:Quoted message said:When I use panko I put a little mustard in the egg white...just a
thought.
Yes, hot chinese, a good mustard plaster. And before the egg white
wash I would have given Melba's breasts a caress with dusting flour,
evening in paris of course... tweaks em so the panko sticks better. I
also would have tsken my trusty mallet in hand to gently pound Barb's
breasts to voluptuous tenderness... make em kinda flat like chicken
mammogram diane. lol
Ohfercripesake! What's funny is that I just had my annual squash a
couple days ago. I've a feeling the procedure is more uncomfortable for
small-breasted women than for we who are not so. A couple years ago I
reported to Rob that the tech, while positioning the body parts in
discussion, kept referring it to it as "tissue." "OK, now I'm going to
move the tissue here." He laughed and said, "Don't you mean "[censored]-sue"?
Oy. He's so witty when he wants to be.
For you folks who don't know this poy-em, I offer this:
Ode to a Mammogram
(author unknown to me, it's been around for at least 30 years)
For years and years they told me,
Be careful of your breasts.
Don¹t ever squeeze or bruise them,
And give them monthly tests.
So I heeded all their warnings,
And protected them by law;
Guarded them very carefully,
And always wore a bra.
After 30 years of careful care,
The Doctor found a lump.
He ordered up a mammogram
To look inside that clump.
³Stand up very close,² she said,
As she got my [censored] in line.
³And tell me when it hurts,² she said,
³Ah, yes! There! That¹s just fine!²
She stepped upon a pedal;
I could not believe my eyes!
A plastic plate was pressing down;
My [censored] was in a vice!!
My skin was stretched and stretched
From way up by my chin,
And my poor [censored] was being squashed
To Swedish pancake thin!!
Excruciating pain I felt,
Within its vice-like grip.
A prisoner in this vicious thing,
My poor defenseless [censored]!
³Take a deep breath,² she said to me.
Who does she think she¹s kidding?
My chest is smashed in her machine,
I can¹t breathe and woozy I¹m getting.
³There, that was good,² I heard her say
As the room was slowly swaying.
³Now, let¹s get the other one.²
³Lord have mercy,² I was praying.
It squeezed me from the up and down,
It squeezed me from both sides.
I¹ll bet she¹s never had this done
To her tender little hide!
If I had no problem when I came in,
I surely have one now....
If there had been a cyst in there,
It would have popped -- KerPOW
This machine was made by a man,
Of this I have no doubt.
I¹d like to get his balls in there,
For months he¹d go ³without.²!
Careful, Sheldon, I'm reaching for my mallet. It might be a KNEEjerk
reaction.
--
-Barb, <http://www.jamlady.eboard.com> Chutney Chicken pic added 4-1-05.
"I read recipes the way I read science fiction: I get to the end and
say,'Well, that's not going to happen.'" - Comedian Rita Rudner,
performance at New York, New York, January 10, 2005.