Jokes · Public discussion

Political jokes

Started by swalia · · Last activity · 27 posts · 4,529 views

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Jokes
Published
12 May 2016
Last activity
1 May 2018
Original author
swalia
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27
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  1. What does Melania see in Donald Trump?
    "Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"

  2. Late one night a mugger wearing a mask stopped a well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs. "Give me your money," he demanded. Scandalized, the man replied, "You can’t do this – I’m a US Congressman!" "Oh! In that case," smiled the robber, "Give me MY money!"

  3. Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
    A: Your Honor.
    Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50?
    A: Senator.

  4. In the news today, Donald Trump announced that he was withdrawing his name for consideration for President of the United States!

    Turns out he really doesn't want to downsize and that neighborhood stinks.

  5. India is a country where you need no education to become a minister but You need to be educated to work under them.

  6. A newly appointed health minister whose knowledge of English was somewhat elementary was on his first official visit to the largest hospital in the Capital.

    The Director of Medical Services took the minister round the operating theatres and general wards till they came to the women patients' section.

    "This, sir, is the labour ward," explained the director.

    The minister stopped in his tracks and said firmly, "I will not visit this ward. Don't you know we have a labour minister in the government? I must not trespass into his domain."

  7. Once Laloo was coming out of airport.

    As there was huge rush the security guard told Laloo “WAIT SIR“…

    For which Laloo replied “65Kgs” and moved on…

  8. How many Libertarians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
    R: None. The invisible hand of the market will take care of it.

  9. If con is the opposite of pro, then isn’t Congress the opposite of progress?

    Jon Stewart

  10. What is the difference between a politician and an actor? An actor gets better scripts with more credible story-lines.

  11. Q: Whats the difference between a politician and a snail?
    A: One is slimy, a pest, and leaves a trail everywhere and the other is a snail.

  12. Q: Why did President Obama get two terms?
    A: Because every black man gets a longer sentence.

  13. The problem with political jokes is they get elected!

  14. Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.
    -
    José Maria de Eça de Queiroz

  15. What do you get when you cross a corrupt lawyer with a crooked politician? Chelsea Clinton.

  16. India is a country where you need no education to become a minister but You need to be educated to work under them.

  17. Quite right and sadly India and most countries in the world.

  18. India is a developing country. Proof:
    1. Soon we'll surpass China in terms of population.
    2. Soon we'll surpass US in number of states!

  19. I am not really sure, more population than China?

  20. Why does Hillary prefer dogs to Bill Clinton? A dog chases his own tail

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