Obvious jokes

RonSonic said:

It is impossible to prove ones innocence.

I came close. The girl said if it wasn't my first time, it couldn't
have been more than the second or third...

Curtis L. Russell
Odenton, MD (USA)
Just someone on two wheels...

benjo maso said:

"ilan" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

benjo maso said:

"ilan" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

>Yes, since both Basso and Ullrich reacted to their suspensions by
>stating
>that they would now prove their innocence, it seems clear that the
>current
>situation is that riders are guilty until proven innocent.

I'm afraid you're wrong.

I'm not wrong, because you have not proved your innocence.

My lawyer instructed me to say nothing.

Benjo

Would your dog be willing to make a statement?

Mark

ilan said:

Quoted message said:

I'm not wrong, because you have not proved your innocence.

benjo maso said:

My lawyer instructed me to say nothing.

I knew you had to be taking carphedon to enhance your memory.

Since you failed to follow his counsel, you must be guilty. Of course,
someone who says nothing is also guilty, because he has something
to hide. Therefore, you are guilty no matter what you do or say.

By the way, I'm staying in Montreal this summer, so I'm taking lessons
from [censored] Pound (who is taking lessons from Tomás de Torquemada).

-ilan

benjo maso said:

My lawyer instructed me to say nothing.

Benjo

In article <[email hidden]>,

Mark said:

benjo maso said:

My lawyer instructed me to say nothing.

Benjo

Would your dog be willing to make a statement?

When asked how things were going, the dog answered in his native tongue, and
said, "Ruff."

--
tanx,
Howard

Never take a tenant with a monkey.

remove YOUR SHOES to reply, ok?

[email hidden] wrote:

<snip>

Quoted message said:

How about starring in "Flipper"? Surely Flipper could
find the real dopers. Probably they're in the TV room,
watching "Flipper."

Is that why it's called the Dolphin Libre? Anyway, Flipper could only find
the real dopers if they were 12, had gone off in their sailing skiff 2 hrs
before a hurricane struck, and were now stuck in a giant clam on a barrier
island as the tide was coming in. Flipper would then alert the dad, who
would heroically sail his swamp boat out to the barrier island, as wind
machines and fire hoses simulated a storm-tossed sea, and save the dopers
for later punishment. Except come to think of it, the swamp boat is
probably from Gentle Ben, which you shouldn't take personally, I didn't
name the tv series.

I'm thinking you want Lassie to find the dopers. Or maybe Gentle Ben.

--
Bill Asher

Robert Chung said:

First thing I'd do is replace the broken sword with a big-ass rifle.

This is rbr so I can nitpick, but the rifle came before the sword in tv
land.

--
Bill Asher

William Asher said:

Robert Chung said:

First thing I'd do is replace the broken sword with a big-ass rifle.

This is rbr so I can nitpick, but the rifle came before the sword in tv
land.

And it wasn't all that big a rifle, especially for TV. Tom Selleck had
a big-ass rifle in that movie where he traveled half way around the
world to shoot Australians from England, or something like that.

Curtis L. Russell
Odenton, MD (USA)
Just someone on two wheels...

William Asher said:

I'm thinking you want Lassie to find the dopers. Or maybe Gentle Ben.

You must have missed the National Geographic special where GEntle Ben
when whacko after ten years on steroids. Did his own stunts, needed
them for recovery.

Curtis L. Russell
Odenton, MD (USA)
Just someone on two wheels...

William Asher said:

Robert Chung said:

First thing I'd do is replace the broken sword with a big-ass rifle.

This is rbr so I can nitpick, but the rifle came before the sword in tv
land.

Dumbass,

That was my point. He traded a big-ass rifle for a broken sword. If he
were really interested in clearing his name he would've traded back.

Robert Chung said:

William Asher said:

Robert Chung said:

First thing I'd do is replace the broken sword with a big-ass rifle.

This is rbr so I can nitpick, but the rifle came before the sword in tv
land.

Dumbass,

That was my point. He traded a big-ass rifle for a broken sword. If he
were really interested in clearing his name he would've traded back.

I did a little digging and in fact it was at the insistence of Conners that
he be allowed to keep the broken sword as his weapon of choice and not go
back to the rifle. Partly he felt he'd done all artistically that he could
do with a firearm but mainly since the show was about courage, he felt
fighting with only half a sword was braver than using a rifle. He wanted
to be able to demonstrate character through a gentler use of force by
throwing a sword and skewering someone rather than just shooting them.
You're in France so you may want to look up the word courage (or bravery)
in a dictionary to see what I am talking about. Use an english one though,
there is no word for bravery (or courage) in french (it's sort of like
russian has no word for freedom (Reagan was right about everything and I am
sure that Bush would back me on the french thing)). It all balances out
though since there is no word in english for blowjob and if you're getting
a blowjob, who needs courage?

--
Bill Asher

Curtis L. Russell said:

William Asher said:

I'm thinking you want Lassie to find the dopers. Or maybe Gentle Ben.

You must have missed the National Geographic special where GEntle Ben
when whacko after ten years on steroids. Did his own stunts, needed
them for recovery.

I only read National Geographic for the pictures of naked women. And the
letters.

--
Bill Asher

Curtis L. Russell wrote:

<snip>

Quoted message said:

And it wasn't all that big a rifle, especially for TV. Tom Selleck had
a big-ass rifle in that movie where he traveled half way around the
world to shoot Australians from England, or something like that.

We've gone through gun inflation. Connors didn't need a big gun like
Selleck because Connors could do the twirly thing while firing. Selleck
would have shot himself in the ear doing that. Think back, Jack Webb and
Harry Morgan fought all those crooks and caught all those bad guys with
snub-nosed 5-shot .38s. Broderick Crawford never even pulled his gun in
Highway Patrol, that I can remember anyway, but then I only vaguely
remember the series and the only scene I do remember was of Crawford
leaning in the car window talking on the radio, he didn't have his gun out
for that. Armed only with a scuba knife, Lloyd Bridges sank entire foreign
naval squadrons, *after* a large grappling-hook thing dragged along the
bottom had taken his air tank. The point is, back then, men didn't need
big-ass guns, they had panache. You might want to look up the meaning of
panache, but use an english dictionary since there is no word in french for
panache.

--
Bill Asher

William Asher said:

I did a little digging and in fact it was at the insistence of Conners
that he be allowed to keep the broken sword as his weapon of choice and
not go back to the rifle. Partly he felt he'd done all artistically
that he could do with a firearm but mainly since the show was about
courage, he felt fighting with only half a sword was braver than using
a rifle. He wanted to be able to demonstrate character through a
gentler use of force by throwing a sword and skewering someone rather
than just shooting them. You're in France so you may want to look up
the word courage (or bravery) in a dictionary to see what I am talking
about. Use an english one though, there is no word for bravery (or
courage) in french (it's sort of like russian has no word for freedom
(Reagan was right about everything and I am sure that Bush would back
me on the french thing)). It all balances out though since there is no
word in english for blowjob and if you're getting a blowjob, who needs
courage?

Wasn't it Bush who said there was no word for entrepreneur in French?

Robert Chung said:

Wasn't it Bush who said there was no word for entrepreneur in French?

He's right of course, but that's mainly just another example of how even a
blind pig finds an acorn now and then.

--
Bill Asher

William Asher <[email hidden]> wrote in
news:[email hidden]:

Quoted message said:

The point is, back then, men didn't need big-ass guns, they had
panache.

You should have watched "The Rifleman" -- he had a big ass gun, but no
panache. Even beter was the cryptically named "Have Gun, Will Travel" --
Paladin had a gun and panache, and that made him invincible!

NS
no gun, no panache

Marty said:

So Lance's dog is "Cowboy"?
--
Marty

LA isn't that stupid...
Cowboy is probably Levi

William Asher said:

Quoted message said:

How about starring in "Flipper"? Surely Flipper could
find the real dopers. Probably they're in the TV room,
watching "Flipper."

Is that why it's called the Dolphin Libre?

Oh God, you [censored]. That took a few minutes to sink in.
Surely the worst pun in RBR all year. You owe me.

Quoted message said:

Anyway, Flipper could only find
the real dopers if they were 12, had gone off in their sailing skiff 2 hrs
before a hurricane struck, and were now stuck in a giant clam on a barrier
island as the tide was coming in. Flipper would then alert the dad, who
would heroically sail his swamp boat out to the barrier island, as wind
machines and fire hoses simulated a storm-tossed sea, and save the dopers
for later punishment. Except come to think of it, the swamp boat is
probably from Gentle Ben, which you shouldn't take personally, I didn't
name the tv series.

I'm thinking you want Lassie to find the dopers. Or maybe Gentle Ben.

You know, I'm pretty sure this picture came from
that episode:

http://www.xs4all.nl/~ewoud/cycling/curacao.jpg

"[email hidden]" <[email hidden]> wrote in
news:[email hidden]:

<snip>

Quoted message said:

You know, I'm pretty sure this picture came from
that episode:

http://www.xs4all.nl/~ewoud/cycling/curacao.jpg

If we're going to hate Moreau for simply riding with his tongue out, it
is ok to hate those three based on that picture?

--
Bill Asher