More steroid abuses!

FabulustRunner said:

Just in: Rudolph tested positive for steroids. Banned from any reindeer games.

Unbelievable...my guess would have been Blitzen.

"FabulustRunner" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Just in: Rudolph tested positive for steroids. Banned from any reindeer

games.

you know my kid reads this newsgroup and now he thinks that Rudolph has been
"cheating". it's bad enough that all his heroes (Bonds, Giambi, Chris
Farley) have been exposed but did you have to burst his bubble about
Rudolph. i told him Santa slipped it to him so he took it unknowingly but he
still seems upset. I'm afraid to let him borrow the car.

Quoted message said:

you know my kid reads this newsgroup and now he thinks that Rudolph has been
"cheating".

Better not let him read the part about him getting that STD from Santa, if he
finds out santa slipped rudolph GHB before the roids, and what happened in
between, he'd really be upset.

Quoted message said:

I'm afraid to let him borrow the car.

Hmm...if he's old enough to drive and still believes in santa, maybe he should
just keep riding that short bus, instead of driving.

In article <[email hidden]>,

Mourning Would said:

"FabulustRunner" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Just in: Rudolph tested positive for steroids. Banned from any reindeer

games.

you know my kid reads this newsgroup and now he thinks that Rudolph has been
"cheating". it's bad enough that all his heroes (Bonds, Giambi, Chris
Farley) have been exposed but did you have to burst his bubble about
Rudolph. i told him Santa slipped it to him so he took it unknowingly but he
still seems upset. I'm afraid to let him borrow the car.

Yeah, he thought it was "magic corn" because that's what Santa told him?
Magic corn my ass! I believe that about as much as I believe Barry Bonds
thought he was taking flaxseed oil.

Everyone who follows Christmas knows that Rudolph has been dirty for
years. I mean, face it, you don't go from not even being allowed to play
in any reindeer games to getting a scholarship to Division IA Polar
University without some "help."

Plus, we all know that "red nose" thing isn't congenital. That dude puts
so much blow up his nose I'm surprised it's only red. Damn thing should
probably have fallen off by now.

His sexual indiscretions are legendary. He gets more reindeer tang than,
well, a reindeer astronaut. And Kobe Bryant is freakin' crisis counselor
compared to Rudolph! Do you know how much silence he's bought with the
promise of extra presents under the Christmas tree? One of these days
he's going to knock up a Jew or a Muslim and then he's going to be
screwed.

Shouldn't be long until we see a VH1 "Behind the Music" about the
"Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" song.

--Harold Buck

"I used to rock and roll all night,
and party every day.
Then it was every other day. . . ."
-Homer J. Simpson

Quoted message said:

Yeah, he thought it was "magic corn" because that's what Santa told him?
Magic corn my ass! I believe that about as much as I believe Barry Bonds
thought he was taking flaxseed oil.

Everyone who follows Christmas knows that Rudolph has been dirty for
years. I mean, face it, you don't go from not even being allowed to play
in any reindeer games to getting a scholarship to Division IA Polar
University without some "help."

Plus, we all know that "red nose" thing isn't congenital. That dude puts
so much blow up his nose I'm surprised it's only red. Damn thing should
probably have fallen off by now.

His sexual indiscretions are legendary. He gets more reindeer tang than,
well, a reindeer astronaut. And Kobe Bryant is freakin' crisis counselor
compared to Rudolph! Do you know how much silence he's bought with the
promise of extra presents under the Christmas tree? One of these days
he's going to knock up a Jew or a Muslim and then he's going to be
screwed.

Shouldn't be long until we see a VH1 "Behind the Music" about the
"Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" song.

--Harold Buck

LOL, you win.

In article <6fkwd.509926$wV.273663@attbi_s54>,

Leo Reed said:

I've read some of your posts on rstriathlon. I harbour a
secret desire to try that....someday. The swimming does not
intimidate me, but running after biking scares the [censored] out
of me.

Well, your legs feel a little funky for the first mile or so, but if you
practice it a few times you know the feeling goes away. And, of course,
the harder you bike, the funkier the legs will feel at first.

Quoted message said:

The mini is an "event" for me. Being a "back of the pack"
sorta guy, I just plod along and enjoy the people around me.
Being up front, you'll have the chance at a decent finishing time.
Beware the track, if it is a warm day.

Thanks for the advice. I've heard the track is pretty ugly when it's
hot. I'll have a water bottle along and I'll drink a lot and take some
electrolyte capsules as well. It's unlikely to be worse than the 90 and
humid that I had to contend with for my first Ironman race!

Good luck!

--Harold Buck

"I used to rock and roll all night,
and party every day.
Then it was every other day. . . ."
-Homer J. Simpson

"FabulustRunner" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Just in: Rudolph tested positive for steroids. Banned from any reindeer

games.

This would explain the following then:

Rudolph the Red Nose raindeer,

had a very shiny nose.

And if you ever saw him,

you would even say it glows.

All of the other raindeer,

used to LAUGH and call him NAMES.

They wouldn't LET poor Rudolph,

join in any raindeer GAMES.

Then one frosty Christmas eve,

Rudolph lost it.

He could'nt take anymore of the torment and humiliation.

The intolerance and criticism of his unique feature.

A life of pain and anguish, a life of hell, needed to end. And Rudolph
had to end it.

Yes, he did polish his horns that night.

The spell of RAGE and INSANITY overtook him for several hours.

He went in to Santa's house....and yes, he did lash him with his own whip.

The whip that had been used on poor Rudolph so many times before.

This man who had allowed all the abuse by the other raindeer to go on
for all these years.

He needed to pay.

And Rudolph took him out.

Along with several Elves, who tried to thwart him.

Then Rudolph grabbed Santa's semi-automatic, "special toy".

He went into the barn where the other deer were.....

And there would BE no more mockery....there would BE no more rejection.

Rudolph blew them away.

And yes, he decapitated Prancer, because PRANCER had always been EXTRA
snotty, encouraging the others to begin their cruelty and ruthless
insults.... such as "Rudolph....the Red Nosed Freak".

So I ask you.....ladies and gentlemen of the jury....is this sweet,
glowing little wide eyed face that of a cold blooded killer?

Or of an innocent creature....abused from the day he was ripped from his
mothers hooves...and forced into slavery. To be verbally bashed,
neglected, and isolated....everyday of his life....and who JUST COULD'NT
TAKE IT ANYMORE.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury.....I rest my case.

It's "reindeer". (thought I'd beat Skurf to it)

Quoted message said:

Just in: Rudolph tested positive for steroids. Banned from any reindeer
games.

I remember that movie.

Quoted message said: