Local Tomato Banned as Lethal Weapon

Stark said:

I know, they're being grown for shipment and to reduce spoilage on the
produce shelf, but Jeez! Even the roadside stands in Ripley are
selling stones. Can't eat 'em. Can't lob 'em at bad comics or Rock 'n
Roll impersonators. Guaranteed not to splat. I hear our local hunters
are saving them for deer season.

Maybe it's the weather? Wherever Ripley is, you get tomatoes early!

Sue(tm)
Lead me not into temptation... I can find it myself!

Stark said:

Used to be we waited for the Ripley tomatoes, long about mid June,
sometimes later. They were delicious--an acidic delicacy. This year
they're rocks, pretty to look at, very photogenic even when sliced;
but you've got to use a steak knife to cut 'em. And the flavor's off.
They're sweet.

I agree. Ripley (Tennessee) tomatoes were always the *best* tomatoes! Now
they just kind of suck. The *very* early ones were pretty good; some
conscientious farmers took them to market right off the vine. But now...
(sigh).

Quoted message said:

I know, they're being grown for shipment and to reduce spoilage on the
produce shelf, but Jeez! Even the roadside stands in Ripley are
selling stones. Can't eat 'em. Can't lob 'em at bad comics or Rock 'n
Roll impersonators.

You could if you seriously wanted to hurt one of the Elvis impersonators.
Just claim tomato ignorance in court; say you saw it done on television and
had no idea it would really *hurt* anyone 😉

Guaranteed not to splat. I hear our local hunters

Quoted message said:

are saving them for deer season.

Baiting deer is illegal (of course you know that) but at this rate even the
deer might not go for them. I, too, miss really good Ripley tomatoes.

Jill

Curly Sue said:

Stark said:

I know, they're being grown for shipment and to reduce spoilage on
the produce shelf, but Jeez! Even the roadside stands in Ripley are
selling stones. Can't eat 'em. Can't lob 'em at bad comics or Rock 'n
Roll impersonators. Guaranteed not to splat. I hear our local hunters
are saving them for deer season.

Maybe it's the weather? Wherever Ripley is, you get tomatoes early!

Sue(tm)
Lead me not into temptation... I can find it myself!

It's Ripley, Tennessee, where they are known for their tomatoes and hold an
annual tomato festival in early July. Ripley is about 60-65 miles from my
home (which is outside of Memphis, TN).

Jill

jmcquown said:

Stark said:

Used to be we waited for the Ripley tomatoes, long about mid June,
sometimes later. They were delicious--an acidic delicacy. This year
they're rocks, pretty to look at, very photogenic even when sliced;
but you've got to use a steak knife to cut 'em. And the flavor's off.
They're sweet.

I agree. Ripley (Tennessee) tomatoes were always the *best* tomatoes! Now
they just kind of suck. The *very* early ones were pretty good; some
conscientious farmers took them to market right off the vine. But now...
(sigh).

Quoted message said:

Guaranteed not to splat. I hear our local hunters

Quoted message said:

are saving them for deer season.

Baiting deer is illegal (of course you know that) but at this rate even the
deer might not go for them. I, too, miss really good Ripley tomatoes.

Actually, I think OP meant them there hunters were gonna use 'em to
kill deer with, not bait deer. Use a salt block to bait 'em and bean
'em on the noggin right twixt the eyes with one of them there Ripley
'maters! They'll go down faster then a fly in a freezer.

Sandi - whose Sig Other knows EXACTLY where Ripley is having lived over
in Lake County in Tiptonville

Sandi said:

jmcquown said:

Stark said:

Used to be we waited for the Ripley tomatoes, long about mid June,
sometimes later. They were delicious--an acidic delicacy. This year
they're rocks, pretty to look at, very photogenic even when sliced;
but you've got to use a steak knife to cut 'em. And the flavor's
off. They're sweet.

I agree. Ripley (Tennessee) tomatoes were always the *best*
tomatoes! Now they just kind of suck. The *very* early ones were
pretty good; some conscientious farmers took them to market right
off the vine. But now... (sigh).

Quoted message said:

Guaranteed not to splat. I hear our local hunters

Quoted message said:

are saving them for deer season.

Baiting deer is illegal (of course you know that) but at this rate
even the deer might not go for them. I, too, miss really good
Ripley tomatoes.

Actually, I think OP meant them there hunters were gonna use 'em to
kill deer with, not bait deer. Use a salt block to bait 'em and bean
'em on the noggin right twixt the eyes with one of them there Ripley
'maters! They'll go down faster then a fly in a freezer.

Sandi - whose Sig Other knows EXACTLY where Ripley is having lived
over
in Lake County in Tiptonville

LOL okay, maybe I misunderstood. But deer *do* like to eat tomatoes 🙂

Jill

In article <[email hidden]>,

Sandi said:

Actually, I think OP meant them there hunters were gonna use 'em to
kill deer with, not bait deer. Use a salt block to bait 'em and bean
'em on the noggin right twixt the eyes with one of them there Ripley
'maters! They'll go down faster then a fly in a freezer.

Sandi - whose Sig Other knows EXACTLY where Ripley is having lived over
in Lake County in Tiptonville

I was thinking of beaning 'em. Now I'm think of Tiptonville where if
you stood on an anthill you could see for eighteen miles. I was born a
little north of thar in Hickman, KY. Actually a little north of thar in
Mayfield, the nearest hospital where my Mom languished from a normal
birth for five days in a private room for a total of $68.00. Not sure
what the doctor got. Maybe a ten spot or a slab of smoked bacon.

I don't miss the good ole days near as much as the good ole maters.