Letter to Halfords

Tilly said:

I wonder if anyone could help me put this letter in more technical
language. (Karina Smith is a pseudonym).

=====

Dear Sir/Madam,

I write to you as a Transport for London accredited cycling instructor
and school teacher for the daughter of one of your customers.

Mrs Smith bought a bicycle and cycle helmet from you for her
daughter's birthday two weeks ago. The bike is absolutely idea for

typo ideal

Quoted message said:

Karina's use, and I have absolutely no problem with the advice you
gave. However, the bicycle was supplied in an unroadworthy condition
and the cycle helmet was incorrectly fitted to Karina's head.

On the bike, one of the front brake blocks is incorrectly adjusted so
only half of it is in contact with the wheel rim, you will need to
correct this. When the front brake is fully applied, the brake lever
is in contact with the handle bar grips. I have made some improvement

The front brake cannot be properly used, as the brake lever contacts the
handle bar before the brake is fully applied.

?

Quoted message said:

to this with finger adjustment at the brake lever end, but it requires
further adjustment. The chainring gear cable is severely frayed and
needs repair or replacement. The other gear and brake cables need to
be cut back and capped. All new bikes must be supplied with a bell.

ref to

http://www.bikebiz.co.uk/daily-news/article.php?id=4051

maybe you want to cut n paste some details?

Quoted message said:

The helmet's straps were too loose, and if dislodged the helmet could
have come off Karina's head and trapped around the back of her head
with the straps around her neck. The four straps, two either side of
the helmet, should have been adjusted to pass either side of the ear,
with the connector below the ear. Your staff had fitted it so the
connectors on both sides were above Karina's ear. An incorrectly
fitting helmet is more dangerous than no helmet at all, and leaves you
open to liability claims in the unlikely event of an accident.

The bike will still need its standard six week service.

James

Tilly said:

I wonder if anyone could help me put this letter in more technical
language. (Karina Smith is a pseudonym).

I wouldn't bother with the technical stuff, its better if it looks like its
come from an "ordinary customer", or friend of an ordinary customer, rather
than a cycling fiend.

Suggested changes:
State date and store where the items were bought.
Say that the bike size is correct (rather than the bike is ideal, which
might imply correctly supplied).
Remove comment about "no problem with advice you gave" because there are a
lot of problems with the bike supplied, and evidently the advice on the
helmet strap sizing was wrong.
Say that you understand bells are now mandatory when a cycle is sold (its
implied in the text below, not stated).

- Nigel

Quoted message said:

=====

Dear Sir/Madam,

I write to you as a Transport for London accredited cycling instructor
and school teacher for the daughter of one of your customers.

Mrs Smith bought a bicycle and cycle helmet from you for her
daughter's birthday two weeks ago. The bike is absolutely idea for
Karina's use, and I have absolutely no problem with the advice you
gave. However, the bicycle was supplied in an unroadworthy condition
and the cycle helmet was incorrectly fitted to Karina's head.

On the bike, one of the front brake blocks is incorrectly adjusted so
only half of it is in contact with the wheel rim, you will need to
correct this. When the front brake is fully applied, the brake lever
is in contact with the handle bar grips. I have made some improvement
to this with finger adjustment at the brake lever end, but it requires
further adjustment. The chainring gear cable is severely frayed and
needs repair or replacement. The other gear and brake cables need to
be cut back and capped. All new bikes must be supplied with a bell.

The helmet's straps were too loose, and if dislodged the helmet could
have come off Karina's head and trapped around the back of her head
with the straps around her neck. The four straps, two either side of
the helmet, should have been adjusted to pass either side of the ear,
with the connector below the ear. Your staff had fitted it so the
connectors on both sides were above Karina's ear. An incorrectly
fitting helmet is more dangerous than no helmet at all, and leaves you
open to liability claims in the unlikely event of an accident.

The bike will still need its standard six week service.

Tilly said:

I wonder if anyone could help me put this letter in more technical
language. (Karina Smith is a pseudonym).

=====

Dear Sir/Madam,

I write to you as a Transport for London accredited cycling instructor
and school teacher for the daughter of one of your customers.

Mrs Smith bought a bicycle and cycle helmet from you for her
daughter's birthday two weeks ago. The bike is absolutely idea for

ideal, not idea.

Quoted message said:

Karina's use, and I have absolutely no problem with the advice you
gave. However, the bicycle was supplied in an unroadworthy condition
and the cycle helmet was incorrectly fitted to Karina's head.

On the bike, one of the front brake blocks is incorrectly adjusted so
only half of it is in contact with the wheel rim, you will need to
correct this. When the front brake is fully applied, the brake lever
is in contact with the handle bar grips.

Point out that this makes it impossible to fully apply the brake. There
are strict regulations about supplying new bikes with incorrectly
adjusted brakes.

Quoted message said:

I have made some improvement
to this with finger adjustment at the brake lever end, but it requires
further adjustment. The chainring gear cable is severely frayed and
needs repair or replacement. The other gear and brake cables need to
be cut back and capped. All new bikes must be supplied with a bell.

The helmet's straps were too loose, and if dislodged the helmet could
have come off Karina's head and trapped around the back of her head
with the straps around her neck. The four straps, two either side of
the helmet, should have been adjusted to pass either side of the ear,
with the connector below the ear. Your staff had fitted it so the
connectors on both sides were above Karina's ear. An incorrectly
fitting helmet is more dangerous than no helmet at all, and leaves you
open to liability claims in the unlikely event of an accident.

The liability phrase could be dropped. It might be worth mentioning that
you are writing to them to give them a chance to correct their ways,
rather than taking it straight to the trading standards officer.

Quoted message said:

The bike will still need its standard six week service.

...d

2nd draft.

I should have mentioned this before. I promised the mum I'd write a
letter for her to take with her into Halfords. I'm not sure of the
exact date of purchase or indeed the branch, I think it's Mason's
Hill, Bromley. It is important that mum and daughter know that the
purchase is a good, which is why I need to say that the bike is ideal
for Karina's use.

=====

Dear Sir/Madam,

I write to you as a Transport for London accredited cycling instructor
and school teacher for the daughter of one of your customers.

Mrs Smith bought a bicycle and cycle helmet from you for her
daughter's birthday two weeks ago. The bike is the right size for
Karina's use and the saddle height is correct. However, the bicycle
was supplied in an unroadworthy condition and the cycle helmet was
incorrectly fitted to Karina's head. With the essential repairs
outlined below, the bike is ideal for Karina's use.

On the bike, one of the front brake blocks is incorrectly adjusted so
only half of it is in contact with the wheel rim, you will need to
correct this. The front brake cannot be properly used, as the brake
lever contacts the handle bar, this makes it impossible to fully apply
the brake. There are strict regulations about supplying new bikes with
incorrectly adjusted brakes. I have made some improvement to this
with finger adjustment at the brake lever end, but it requires further
adjustment. The chainring gear cable is severely frayed and needs
repair or replacement. The other gear and brake cables need to be cut
back and capped. I understand that it is now mandatory for all new
bicycles to be fitted with a working bell, Karina's bike wasn't
supplied with a bell.

The helmet's straps were too loose, and if dislodged the helmet could
have come off Karina's head and trapped around the back of her head
with the straps around her neck. The four straps, two either side of
the helmet, should have been adjusted to pass either side of the ear,
with the connector below the ear. Your staff had fitted it so the
connectors on both sides were above Karina's ear.

I am writing to you, rather than trading standards, so that you can
make the essential repairs. The bike will still need its standard six
week service.

Tilly said:

On the bike, one of the front brake blocks is incorrectly adjusted so
only half of it is in contact with the wheel rim, you will need to
correct this.

Run-on sentence. Replace the comma with a full stop after 'rim'.

--
Keith Willoughby http://flat222.org/keith/
"You've sunk my battleship!"

Keith Willoughby said:

Tilly said:

On the bike, one of the front brake blocks is incorrectly adjusted so
only half of it is in contact with the wheel rim, you will need to
correct this.

Run-on sentence, replace the comma with a full stop after 'rim'.

I fixed your post.

:-)

James

Tilly said:

I wonder if anyone could help me put this letter in more technical
language. (Karina Smith is a pseudonym).

Looks good as it is to me. To use more conventional terms, you could say
"front gear cable" instead of "chainring gear cable", and "cable adjuster
at the lever end" instead of "finger adjuster...", but your draft is clear
enough, and anyone in the trade should know exactly what you mean.

Well done for pursuing the matters. It's a shame the people at Halfords
don't take more care or pride in their work, whatever they're paid.

~PB

James Annan said:

Keith Willoughby said:

Tilly said:

On the bike, one of the front brake blocks is incorrectly adjusted so
only half of it is in contact with the wheel rim, you will need to
correct this.

This is a run-on sentence. Replace the comma with a full stop after
'rim'.

I fixed your post.

:-)

I re-fixed it to my taste.

--
Keith Willoughby http://flat222.org/keith/
There's a song about Alice

Tilly said:

2nd draft.

I understand that it is now mandatory for all new
bicycles to be fitted with a working bell, Karina's bike wasn't
supplied with a bell.

I'd skip the "I understand". Try: "Since 1 May 2004 it has been
mandatory for all new bicycles supplied completed to be fitted with a
working bell, Karina's machine was not."

If you want a reference, it's The Pedal Bicycles (Safety) Regulations
2003, Statutory Instrument 2003 No 1101:
<URL:http://www.legislation.hmso.gov.uk/cgi-bin/htm_hl.pl?DB=hmso-new&STEMMER=en&WORDS=bicycl+bell+&COLOUR=Red&STYLE=s&URL=http://www.hmso.gov.uk/si/si2003/20031101.htm#muscat_highlighter_first_match>

Of, if you have trouble with URL wrap, go to
<URL:http://www.legislation.hmso.gov.uk/acts.htm> and search for bicycle
bell.

--
Danny Colyer (the UK company has been laughed out of my reply address)
<URL:http://www.speedy5.freeserve.co.uk/danny/>
"He who dares not offend cannot be honest." - Thomas Paine

In article <[email hidden]>, Pete Biggs

Quoted message said:

Well done for pursuing the matters. It's a shame the people at
Halfords don't take more care or pride in their work, whatever
they're paid.

Some do some don't - don't waste time with a letter just take the
bike back, point out the bits which are wrong and say I'll wait.
Clarifies the mind.

And ask to be allowed to choose a helmet.

--
A T (Sandy) Morton
on the Bicycle Island
In the Global Village
http://www.millport.net

"Tilly" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

I wonder if anyone could help me put this letter in more technical
language. (Karina Smith is a pseudonym).

=====

Dear Sir/Madam,

I think the typo's and advice has been covered, but please post any response
from Halfords on here. Personally I think they should justify their staff
qualification, and maybe you should offer to check some of their work as a
professional 'secret squirrel'. Spend a Saturday and check their work as new
owners walk out. A far more effective wake up call.

Nick

On Tue, 22 Mar 2005 23:59:57 GMT, "elyob" <[email hidden]>

Quoted message said:

I think the typo's and advice has been covered, but please post any response
from Halfords on here. Personally I think they should justify their staff
qualification, and maybe you should offer to check some of their work as a
professional 'secret squirrel'. Spend a Saturday and check their work as new
owners walk out. A far more effective wake up call.

Thanks for everyone's help.

I was appalled that Halfords sold an unroadworthy bike, and that they
had not fitted the helmet correctly.

Initially, mum had bought a helmet at Argos. It was too big and could
not be adjusted. When she went into Halfords she specifically asked
for the helmet to be fitted. Either the sales assistant didn't know
how to fit it correctly, or couldn't be bothered. I know that he
asked the girl if it felt comfortable and she said yes, but that is
far from good enough.

Unfortunately, I wont be able to give this group any feedback for some
time. School breaks up today and I'm off to the Land of a Billion
Cyclists (China - Shanghai and Hainan) on Thursday morning.

Tilly <[email hidden]> wrote in
news:[email hidden]:

Quoted message said:

Unfortunately, I wont be able to give this group any feedback for some
time. School breaks up today and I'm off to the Land of a Billion
Cyclists (China - Shanghai and Hainan) on Thursday morning.

No problem, a trip report involving a bike ride somehow would go down well
on your return.

Graeme

elyob said:

I think the typo's and advice has been covered, but please post any response
from Halfords on here. Personally I think they should justify their staff
qualification, and maybe you should offer to check some of their work as a
professional 'secret squirrel'. Spend a Saturday and check their work as new
owners walk out. A far more effective wake up call.

How about setting up a Doctor Bike outside Halfords during Bike Week ;-)

John B

On 23 Mar 2005 07:12:19 GMT, Graeme <[email hidden]>

Quoted message said:

Tilly <[email hidden]> wrote in
news:[email hidden]:

Quoted message said:

Unfortunately, I wont be able to give this group any feedback for some
time. School breaks up today and I'm off to the Land of a Billion
Cyclists (China - Shanghai and Hainan) on Thursday morning.

No problem, a trip report involving a bike ride somehow would go down well
on your return.

oh no! Oh No! OH NO!

Last time I rode a bike in China it was a pedicab. After drunken
negotiations over the fare, we agreed a price, so long as I cycled.

I crashed.

I should have known that brakes are applied by pulling down on the
cable below the crossbar and that the brake levers were disconnected.

The resulting mayhem took hours to clear up, with crowds of curious
chinese all getting their two yuan's worth in.

I suppose I could hire a bike in Hainan, but Shaghai has a perfectly
good underground network and a 430kph maglev to boot. Besides, bikes
are banned from the best roads in Shanghai.

Pete Biggs wrote:

and anyone in the trade should know exactly what you mean.

Quoted message said:

Your not listening Pete, he said Halfords ;-)

--
Mark
_____________________________________________

Deja Moo - The feeling that you've heard this bull before

MSA said:

Pete Biggs wrote:

and anyone in the trade should know exactly what you mean.

Your not listening Pete, he said Halfords ;-)

Hey, your specs have steamed up. Tilly's a she, ain't she? :-)

~PB

Nigel Cliffe said:

Tilly said:

I wonder if anyone could help me put this letter in more technical
language. (Karina Smith is a pseudonym).

I wouldn't bother with the technical stuff, its better if it looks like
its come from an "ordinary customer", or friend of an ordinary customer,
rather than a cycling fiend.

What makes you think that Tilly is a fiend?
--
Chris

Pete Biggs said:

MSA said:

Pete Biggs wrote:

and anyone in the trade should know exactly what you mean.

Your not listening Pete, he said Halfords ;-)

Hey, your specs have steamed up. Tilly's a she, ain't she? :-)

~PB

Oops bugger, sorry Tilly! Still, what's an S between friends (sHE).

Regards, and admitting to having not heard that name before!

--
Mark
_____________________________________________

Deja Moo - The feeling that you've heard this bull before