Kamikaze squirells

Viktor said:

I was pedalling merrily around Richmond park as I often do
when a psychotic squirrel decided to sprint across the
road just in front of me.

The furry bugger was out of luck and ended up going
through my front spokes where it jammed.

The spinning motion of my wheel through it round and what
followed was a bloody mess.

Literally! I was covered in the furry rodent's blood n
meat chunks and my spokes took some heavy damage.

What a mess. I mean what are the chances!? Have you had
any encounters with the big toothed bushy tailed critters?

Take care...

Noooo!! thats gross. And I'm eating me dinner too. I have
had so many near misses with squirrels that I tend to shout
at them to let them know I'm coming. Mind you in the lanes
round here the main worry is pheasant. You yell at them &
they just stand in the road & stare at you.

Stan Cox

Viktor said:

I was pedalling merrily around Richmond park as I often do
when a psychotic squirrel decided to sprint across the road
just in front of me.

The furry bugger was out of luck and ended up going through
my front spokes where it jammed.

The spinning motion of my wheel through it round and what
followed was a bloody mess.

Literally! I was covered in the furry rodent's blood n meat
chunks and my spokes took some heavy damage.

What a mess. I mean what are the chances!? Have you had any
encounters with the big toothed bushy tailed critters?

Take care...

I trust you came off slightly better than the hapless
rodent.

I'll have to put that in my next risk assessment for cycling
through Greenwich Park.

"Viktor" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
"]news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

I was pedalling merrily around Richmond park as I often
do when a

psychotic

Quoted message said:

squirrel decided to sprint across the road just in
front of me.

The furry bugger was out of luck and ended up going
through my front

spokes

Quoted message said:

where it jammed.

Was it red or grey? There's quite big difference - reds are
relatively rare.

--
Simon M.

Quoted message said:

I was pedalling merrily around Richmond park as I often do
when a psychotic squirrel decided to sprint across the
road just in front of
me.

The furry bugger was out of luck and ended up going
through my front spokes where it jammed.

The spinning motion of my wheel through it round and what
followed was a bloody mess.

Literally! I was covered in the furry rodent's blood n
meat chunks and my spokes took some heavy damage.

What a mess. I mean what are the chances!? Have you had
any encounters with the big toothed bushy tailed critters?

I'm feeling slightly guilty for falling off my chair
laughing...

Whilst we should all regret the loss of this stupid
squirrel, you should be happy that you have done your bit
-however small- in improving the squirrel gene pool. Due to
the actions of countless selfless souls such as yourself
eventually animals will learn to bloody look before they
cross the road.

<insert predictable joke re: 'Should have worn a...' and the
Helmet Initiative Trust for Squirrels

"Viktor" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
"]news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

I was pedalling merrily around Richmond park as I often
do when a

psychotic

Quoted message said:

squirrel decided to sprint across the road just in
front of me.

The furry bugger was out of luck and ended up going
through my front

spokes

Quoted message said:

where it jammed.

The spinning motion of my wheel through it round and what
followed was a bloody mess.

Literally! I was covered in the furry rodent's blood n
meat chunks and my spokes took some heavy damage.

What a mess. I mean what are the chances!? Have you had
any encounters

with

Quoted message said:

the big toothed bushy tailed critters?

Take care...

I've been hit by a duck (!) in Edington. Does that count?

Viktor said:

The furry bugger was out of luck and ended up going
through my front spokes where it jammed.

The spinning motion of my wheel through it round and what
followed was a bloody mess.

Yuk! I've hit a couple of squirrels in my time, including
one where it passed safely in front of my front wheel, then
I felt the rear wheel going over a bump that I know wasn't
usually there. The dopey little twonk had doubled back
behind my front wheel. I've not yet had one try to pass
between my spokes, though I've heard tell of little birdies
doing similar.

I read a post somewhere a while ago about a cycling family
who came to use 'squirrel' as a euphemism for '[censored]',
which I rather liked and have successfully introduced to
other cyclists at work.

--
Danny Colyer (the UK company has been laughed out of my
reply address)
<url:http://www.speedy5.freeserve.co.uk/danny/> Why I like
OE6 - speedy5.freeserve.co.ukoe6.htmlOpen ↗
"He who dares not offend cannot be honest." - Thomas Paine

Quoted message said:

Was it red or grey? There's quite big difference - reds
are relatively rare.

I prefer mine well done with a touch of horseradish sauce
;-)

Simon Mason said:

Quoted message said:

Was it red or grey? There's quite big difference - reds
are relatively

rare.

--
Simon M.

Probably both...grey before impact.....

;-)

Chris

"Simon Mason" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
"]news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

The furry bugger was out of luck and ended up going
through my front

spokes

Quoted message said:

where it jammed.

Was it red or grey? There's quite big difference - reds
are relatively rare.

And according to the Grauniad, the reds taste revolting,
owing to some gland near their kidneys, but the greys are
absolutely yummy, a bit like wild rabbit, but with more
flavour. Don't know if they should be rare or
medium............

I'll get me coat (not that I need it today)

E

Viktor said:

I was pedalling merrily around Richmond park as I often do
when a psychotic squirrel decided to sprint across the
road just in front of me.

The furry bugger was out of luck and ended up going
through my front spokes where it jammed.

The spinning motion of my wheel through it round and what
followed was a bloody mess.

Good!, the squirrels in Richmond park are satans spawn

A few weeks back I was going round when a tree rat ran up a
tree, followed by a bit of tree hitting me on the back of
the neck. I wobbled about 9 inchs left, into a ditch and I'm
flat on my ass.

Hopefully you killed the bugger that got me!

Steve

In article <[email hidden]>,

Mark Thompson said:

<insert predictable joke re: 'Should have worn a...' and
the Helmet Initiative Trust for Squirrels>

YM Squirrel Helmet Initiative Trust?

--
Nick Kew

Nick's manifesto: htmlhelp.com~nickOpen ↗

In message <[email hidden]>,
Viktor <[email hidden]> writes

Quoted message said:

What a mess. I mean what are the chances!? Have you had any
encounters with the big toothed bushy tailed critters?

One or two crossed my path in Brompton Cemetery this
afternoon - I assumed they'd stay clear of me but your
experience means I have to consider them a potential hazard.

However, at the time I was going so slowly that if one made
a dash for the wheel, I could have easily stopped.

--
congokid Good restaurants in London? Number one on Google
congokid.comcongokid.comOpen ↗

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

<insert predictable joke re: 'Should have worn a...' and
the Helmet Initiative Trust for Squirrels>

YM Squirrel Helmet Initiative Trust?

Yep, that's the one, but I don't like to make my humour too
obvious (most of my jokes are so poor it's better for them
to pass unnoticed if not understood :-)

On Sat, 24 Apr 2004 19:35:29 +0100, [email hidden] (Nick Kew)

Quoted message said:

YM Squirrel Helmet Initiative Trust?

LOL

Simon Mason said:

"Viktor" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
"]news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

I was pedalling merrily around Richmond park as I often
do when a

psychotic

Quoted message said:

squirrel decided to sprint across the road just in front
of me.

The furry bugger was out of luck and ended up going
through my front

spokes

Quoted message said:

where it jammed.

Was it red or grey? There's quite big difference - reds
are relatively rare.

Unlikely to have been a red squirrel in Richmond Park
I'd've thought.

<googles> Yep , according to
<http://redsquirrels.hope.ac.uk/distribution.htm>

"In southern England, red squirrels are restricted to the
Isle of Wight, Furzey and Brownsea Islands (Dorset),
Thetford Forest in East Anglia and Jersey. In the north of
England, red squirrels can be found in Northumberland,
Cumbria and in pockets along the Merseyside coast from
Crosby in the south to Southport in the north. "

So unless it was badly lost, probably a grey one.

Still sad (not to mention icky...), but at least not an
endangered species.

--
Carol "Sadistic little buggers, squirrels. I've always said
so. Mind you, rabbits are worse. [censored]!"
- Simon R. Green, _Beyond The Blue Moon_

In my old cycling club in Ottawa, Canada, the term
"squirrely rider" was commonly used to describe the guy/gal
that couldn't hold a straight line and was prone to
indecisive, erratic cycling ... the type of person you did
not want to be drafting in a fast pace line!

I had a moment of terror with a (real) squirrel once ... high-
speed descent (pay off for a very very long standing climb)
... the type of long mountain down-hill where you are
clamping the cross tube with your knees to dampen the
oscillations of the bike. A squirrel darted back & forth in
my path, no doubt trying to decide if it would be sport to
take my front wheel-out or not ... fortunately both squirrel
& I lived to tell the tale.

Rob.

Danny Colyer said:

I read a post somewhere a while ago about a cycling family
who came to use 'squirrel' as a euphemism for '[censored]',
which I rather liked and have successfully introduced to
other cyclists at work.

Quoted message said:

but at least not an endangered species.

Try saying that to the squirrel in question!

Simonb said:

Quoted message said:

but at least not an endangered species.

Try saying that to the squirrel in question!

Well, that one's a bit beyond endangered I'd say....

--
Carol "The bicycle is the product of pure reason applied
to motion."
- Angela Carter, "The Lady of the House of
Love"

"Carol Hague" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
"]news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Still sad (not to mention icky...), but at least not an
endangered species.

No, very very far from it. Not native, and pushed our native
red to the verge of extinction at one point. And if you've
seen a red, they're not even cute.

One less, well done Viktor.

--
Mike W

- one attacked me once.