Your Bloody Soap Box · Public discussion

I Need Dating Advice?

Started by tinajoy · · Last activity · 26 posts · 3,141 views

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Your Bloody Soap Box
Published
15 August 2004
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13 September 2004
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tinajoy
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  1. I know this is a cycling site......but here goes. I met a guy on a dating site. I liked his picture and we have started e-mailing. Turns out we went to the same High School and we talk really good together. He is out of town on business until the beginning of September so we can not meet in person until then. I told him to send me another picture yesterday......and he did.....AND I HATE IT! Could it just be a bad picture? Could I be getting scared and looking for a reason to bail? I'm not sure what I should do? Keep e-mailing? I'm just so diappointed at the picture..........

    Any advice would be helpful.............

  2. Simple,

    does he ride more than 100 miles a week?

    If Yes, then keep up the contact, meet him.

    If NO, then dump him for lack of comitment...

  3. I have seen pictures before that can make anybody look almost good if its done right. I have kind of done the same thing as you here and in all the pictures the girl really didn't look all that over weight but I met her and she was and I was not attracted to her at all. She was really nice we are still friends I was just honest with her for the most part I told her there was no sparks which there wasn't. No need to be cruel. If hes nice meet him just don't put your life on hold.

    Good Luck

  4. Hmm, you like one of his pictures but not another...that's odd unless maybe one is old or something like that. You've got until september, so continue chatting and try and decide if you like him enough to want to meet him. The truth is photos can be deceptive, so try and base it on his personality. If you meet him for a coffee and you decide you're not interested just tell him, no harm done. His ego may be slightly bruised but probably not seriously.

  5. Back in grade school I wouldn't dance with a girl because she was less than attractive. I was called shallow. Ha! Being called shallow by the same girls who wouldn't dance with me because my father wasn't a doctor/lawyer etc. You see, my father was a research physicist at a highly regarded lab and us "geeks" were on a lower social-economic ladder.

    But if looks are everything, don't let one photo be an opposition. I know many cases the camera distorts.

    Here is a question. Take a snapshot the instant you wake up next morning. See how long you keep that picture. I bet you will never show it to anyone.

  6. Did you think you liked him while you were emailing back and forth?? Is he interesting, funny, etc.,etc. Keep up the email, meet him for lunch. Drop him cuz he's an ass, not because he's not photo-genic

  7. I dated online for a year, with a few success, which never lasted more than 3 mos. One of the things I learned is... we have internet personalities, and email personalities, and phone personalities, and sitting across from you personalities. They arent always the same. I may be extremely talkitive in email, but shy. Or, the other way around. Most important thing to remember: "Don't fill in the blanks". Don't assume people will be what you might expect them to be. Just hold off on those thoughts, until those questions start answering themselves.

    Finally... just meet him. At least once. I'm sure there's plenty of pics of me that would make my gf cringe (whom I met online 1.75 years ago), as there are plenty which would make her eyes light up. Just the fact that this guy sent you a "bad" photo could possibly say something about his honesty.

    go for it...

  8. tinajoy said:

    I know this is a cycling site......but here goes. I met a guy on a dating site. I liked his picture and we have started e-mailing. Turns out we went to the same High School and we talk really good together. He is out of town on business until the beginning of September so we can not meet in person until then. I told him to send me another picture yesterday......and he did.....AND I HATE IT! Could it just be a bad picture? Could I be getting scared and looking for a reason to bail? I'm not sure what I should do? Keep e-mailing? I'm just so diappointed at the picture..........

    Any advice would be helpful.............

    if your going to judge a guy by his looks then your just as dumb as us guys , the women I´ve been involved with who were drop dead gorgeous generally turned out to be a vain pain when you got to know them . :eek:
    As long as he ain´t butt- ugly then meet him before passing judgement - but , and it´s a big but , remember that it´s very easy to lie on the page so be carefull he could be jack the ripper for all you know ( or married - we guys can be sods at times )
    good luck

  9. I guess I am old fashion. I could never relate to this e-dating I believe in meeting individuals the old fashion way. You know pick em up in a bar. 😎

  10. jhuskey said:

    I guess I am old fashion. I could never relate to this e-dating I believe in meeting individuals the old fashion way. You know pick em up in a bar. 😎


    Just to keep everyone updated. We are still e-mailing and talking on the phone. We are going to finally meet, not this weekend but next weekend. Do you think you can actually like someone you've never met in person......yet?

  11. tinajoy said:

    Just to keep everyone updated. We are still e-mailing and talking on the phone. We are going to finally meet, not this weekend but next weekend. Do you think you can actually like someone you've never met in person......yet?

    I think you can like them, but whether that like ends up being friendship or relationship sort of like, i think that's something you can't tell until you meet them and spend time with them. Good luck with your date!

  12. Salsa Rider said:

    Did you think you liked him while you were emailing back and forth?? Is he interesting, funny, etc.,etc. Keep up the email, meet him for lunch. Drop him cuz he's an ass, not because he's not photo-genic

    Bingo...my Prince Charming and the man of my dreams turned out to be short, heavy set and bald. He's been a wonderful husband for 16 years and a father without compare and has been a terrific son-in-law. There's a hell of a lot more to a man than his "arm candy" appeal.

    Is he honest? Is he thoughtful? Is he a good person? And no photo in the world's going to answer those questions.

  13. tinajoy said:

    I know this is a cycling site......but here goes. I met a guy on a dating site. I liked his picture and we have started e-mailing. Turns out we went to the same High School and we talk really good together. He is out of town on business until the beginning of September so we can not meet in person until then. I told him to send me another picture yesterday......and he did.....AND I HATE IT! Could it just be a bad picture? Could I be getting scared and looking for a reason to bail? I'm not sure what I should do? Keep e-mailing? I'm just so diappointed at the picture..........

    Any advice would be helpful.............


    I kept blowing off someone who was making contact with me on an on-line dating service because I didn't like her picture. I finally relented and she was gorgeous and had a fantastic, athletic 100 pound body. I told her to change her picture - it didn't come close to doing her justice. Some people just take bad pictures. I wound up falling in love with her! :p

  14. Brunswick_kate said:


    Is he honest? Is he thoughtful? Is he a good person? .

    ....Is he rich?

    Brunswick_kate said:


    And no photo in the world's going to answer those questions.

    Exactly. Ask him to fax you his bank statements. 😄

  15. Take a chance. Meet him.
    You've got nothing to lose.
    If it doesn't work out, cut him loose.
    Good luck !

  16. Looks are not everything, and pictures are misleading, if you feel anything for him, at least meet him...in a public place.

  17. tinajoy said:

    Just to keep everyone updated. We are still e-mailing and talking on the phone. We are going to finally meet, not this weekend but next weekend. Do you think you can actually like someone you've never met in person......yet?


    Meet him in a nuetral, public place so that if you get bad vibes you can keep your privacy. Don 't give him you phone number or address. Go with you gut instincts. If your safe I can see no harm in just meeting him.

  18. donhix1 said:

    Meet him in a nuetral, public place so that if you get bad vibes you can keep your privacy. Don 't give him you phone number or address. Go with you gut instincts. If your safe I can see no harm in just meeting him.


    My date with him is exactly one week from today. Yes, we are meeting in a public place. Truth be told......he would have to be totally disgusting for me not to be interested in him at this point. The man I have e-mailed and spoken with on the phone is just totally terrific!!! I am very excited about finally meeting him!!! I will let everyone know how it goes.

  19. tinajoy said:

    My date with him is exactly one week from today. Yes, we are meeting in a public place. Truth be told......he would have to be totally disgusting for me not to be interested in him at this point. The man I have e-mailed and spoken with on the phone is just totally terrific!!! I am very excited about finally meeting him!!! I will let everyone know how it goes.

    Good luck!! I hope all goes well. 🙂

  20. Jakebrake said:

    Good luck!! I hope all goes well. 🙂


    MY DATE IS TOMORROW! I'M TOTALLY EXCITED!

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