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Good Bad and Uglier than before

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2 April 2004
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2 April 2004
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Mikefule
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  1. Today I decided to revisit the scene of some of my earliest
    MUni rides: the High Peak Trail, starting from Black Rocks,
    near Cromford, in Derbyshire.

    See the close up map here:

    tinyurl.com3yeak

    The High Peak Trail is a leisure path for cyclists, walkers
    and riders which follows the route of an old railway. Black
    Rocks is a gritstone outcrop at the top of the first steep
    incline, and is a popular venue for rock climbers. Nearby
    and along the route of the trail there are several small
    disused quarries.

    The first incline up the trail from Black Rocks is called
    the Middleton Incline. When the railway was in use, the
    trains had to be hauled up the incline by a static steam
    engine and winch. The incline is about
    1/2 mile (0.8 km) long and approximately 1:7 (14%) in
    gradient. The surface is a mixture of grit, ballast, mud
    and the like. Every 20 metres or so there is a diagonal
    ledge made of kerb stones, designed to divert surface
    water in heavy rain to prevent erosion.

    On my first attempt on this incline, less than 2 years ago,
    I only made it 2/3 of the way up, and that was with
    numerous UPDs, dozens of failed mounts, and I retreated
    with my tail between my legs. On my second attempt I did
    even worse. I have ridden it since. My best ever attempt
    was on a (true) 24 inch wheel with 150mm cranks, and that
    involved about 3 UPDs.

    Today was a typically English half-hearted winter's day:
    there was snow on the ground, but not enough to look
    pretty; it was raining, but not enough to need the
    windscreen wipers on the car; the puddles were frozen but
    not enough to walk on; it was foggy, but only enough to be
    irritating when driving; it was cold, but only in that damp
    creeping into your bones sort of way. To summarise: yuck!
    So, on with the ride:

    I park at the car park shown on the map by a P in a blue
    square near Black Rocks and ride easily along the level part
    of the trail. The mud and grit trail is quite badly rutted
    in places by cycle tyre and horse hooves. These ruts have
    frozen and are partly concealed by the thinnest dusting of
    snow. Now and again I hit a deeper patch of mud that has
    only a thin frozen crust, and my wheel slides unpredictably.

    Then I reach the incline and bend to my task. This incline
    has become my personal Everest, and I measure my ability and
    stamina against it now and again. Today I hope to ride all
    the way up in one go.

    Picking my way carefully around the ends of the drainage
    ridges, and trying to use the camber of the track tactically
    to conserve energy and momentum, I make the first couple of
    hundred metres quite easily. I'm already way past the places
    where I had my first 2 or 3 UPDs on that first attempt. I go
    over a bridge over a road, and wonder what the motorists are
    thinking as they look up and see a unicyclist silhouetted
    against the skyline. They probably don't even notice.

    Then the trail gets harder, with lots of rock and ballast
    embedded in the gritty surface. The rocks are limestone,
    which is slimy when wet, and the thin coating of snow makes
    it hard to read the best route. My fingers are cold on the
    bare metal of the handle. By now, I'm standing on the
    pedals, gasping in time with my pedal strokes, and finding
    it harder and harder to pick a route between the bumps. The
    bumps aren't big enough to present a problem in their own
    right, but on a 14% slippery gradient when I'm at the limit
    of my endurance, 5% extra resistance could be enough to stop
    me in my track.

    Yes, on a unicycle, it's track, singular. :0)

    There is a bungalow right next to the trail, just before a
    short tunnel. Someone is in the garden, half ignoring me,
    half wondering what I'm doing. He can see my body bobbing up
    and down, and hear my breathing, but I don't think he can
    see the unicycle from that angle.

    Just as I enter the tunnel, events conspire against me and I
    UPD - half relieved, half disappointed. This matches how far
    I reached on the
    2/150 before UPD- ing. Now I'm on a 26 (x2.6) with 150s, but
    I have a handle. How do they compare? I think the 24/150
    is a touch easier up hill.

    I get my breath back and remount easily. It's now a real
    slog over the difficult rocky surface through the tunnel,
    then after that the trail seems muddier and more slippery.
    Another 100 metres and I UPD. I remount and then UPD about
    10 metres further on. I'm not going to break any records for
    this ascent! :0(

    With two more UPDs, I make it to the top, and I'm able to
    regain my breath within a couple of minutes. The first time
    I reached the top, a year ago, I was so exhausted it knocked
    me out for most of the rest of the day, so that's progress
    of a sort.

    Now I'm at the visitor centre at Middleton Top, shown
    on the map.

    I turn back. There is a notice warning of a steep incline.
    Cyclists are advised NOT to ride down the incline. Of course
    they can't: inclines go UPwards. This is now a DEcline. Thus
    protected by my pedantic love of the language, I decide to
    ride down. It's easy enough, and I ride over the drainage
    ledges instead of skirting round them as I did on the
    ascent. A couple of times I feel the rim bottom out, and
    this makes me nervous of damaging the wheel - nervous enough
    to UPD on one of the higher ridges.

    Soon at the bottom, I turn off the trail to the disused
    quarry to the north. It's only a tiny little quarry, but I
    know there are a few grassy/muddy little paths and a couple
    of slopes and small ledges. Here the snow is a little deeper
    - just enough to make the ride interesting.

    Then I find a bit of a drop. My regular readers will know
    that I'm a big believer that wheels are round for a
    reason, and I don't do drops... but this one fits my
    criteria. It has a slight slope down do it, then there's
    about an 8 inch (20 cm) step down to a short but steepish
    slope. I can ride it...

    I carry the uni to the top, mount and, too hastily, ride
    towards the drop. My right foot isn't quite straight on the
    pedal, and I should treat the drop with more respect... but
    no, I can do it.

    I go over the drop fairly briskly... the tyre digs in... my
    weight pitches forwards... I sail through the air... I see
    the next rocky ledge rushing up towards my face... I know
    it's going to hurt... BANG!

    I lie stunned for a moment. My head has fallen a distance of
    about 8 feet (2.4m) and my jaw has taken the full force of
    the impact. It must be broken. For a few seconds, I don't
    move, then I see blood on the snow, inches from my eyes. I
    move my jaw experimentally. It seems to work. I move it a
    bit more. It doesn't feel broken. I spit to see if the blood
    is from inside my mouth our outside.

    I realise I've badly cut my chin. My tongue discovers that
    half a tooth is missing. I've no idea how bad the cut is,
    and suddenly I feel a long way from anyone. I'm only 50
    metres from the trail, but how many people are using the
    trail in this weather?

    I gather myself together, stand up, and collect the uni. My
    chin is bleeding freely, and I pathetically search my
    Camelbak for a bandage or handkerchief I might accidentally
    have left in there. No luck... and the blood is dripping on
    my new fluorescent green jacket. :0(

    It's a good half mile to the car, so riding seems the
    quickest option - but riding on frozen rutted mud with a
    thin coating of snow looks less appealing when you're
    holding your chin together with one hand and you don't know
    how bad the injury is.

    I pass a couple of groups of walkers who make the usual
    comments and don't notice I have blood all over my face and
    hand. I suppose the unicycle is unexpected, whereas massive
    facial injuries are an everyday occurrence?

    Back to the car, and I find one of my Morris dancing
    handkerchiefs - fortuitously, a red one. Not sterile, but
    red!

    I clean my face as best I can, and look in the car's rear
    view mirror. It looks bad. I ring a friend who lives nearby
    and then drive to his house to be cleaned up. He directs me
    to the local hospital where an exceptionally attractive
    nurse cleans the wound and applies a dressing. She's not
    qualified to stitch wounds, and there are no doctors in, so
    I then drive 25 odd miles to Nottingham's main hospital and
    wait for several hours before an even nicer nurse applies
    seven stitches.

    So here's my contribution to the safety debate:

    Last year I badly hurt my hand and wrist in a low speed fall
    from the Coker. Now I wear Salomon wrist guards designed for
    snowboarders. I know my hands took some of the impact
    because my right shoulder (sword arm :0( ) is bruised and
    that never it the floor. My hands are both uninjured,
    although the wrist protectors are clogged with mud and grit.
    Wear wrist guards!

    My helmet never touched the floor. It never has in any UPD
    from any size of unicycle. A chin guard might well have
    prevented this injury, though. I am likely to buy a helmet
    with a chin guard before riding anywhere near rocks again. I
    was damn' lucky not to break my jaw, and that would have
    been an awful injury to endure. I will have a scar, and I
    will need minor dental repairs. MUni riders, and trialsists:
    think about getting a helmet with a chin guard - it doesn't
    look as stupid as I look right now.

    --
    Mikefule - Roland Hope School of Unicycling
    ------------------------------------------------------------------------
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  2. Mikefule said:

    *I go over the drop fairly briskly... the tyre digs in...
    my weight pitches forwards... I sail through the air... I
    see the next rocky ledge rushing up towards my face... I
    know it's going to hurt... BANG!

    I lie stunned for a moment. My head has fallen a distance
    of about 8 feet (2.4m) and my jaw has taken the full force
    of the impact. It must be broken. For a few seconds, I
    don't move, then I see blood on the snow, inches from my
    eyes. I move my jaw experimentally. It seems to work. I
    move it a bit more. It doesn't feel broken. I spit to see
    if the blood is from inside my mouth our outside.

    I realise I've badly cut my chin. My tongue discovers that
    half a tooth is missing. I've no idea how bad the cut is,
    and suddenly I feel a long way from anyone. I'm only 50
    metres from the trail, but how many people are using the
    trail in this weather?

    ******
    She's not qualified to stitch wounds, and there are no
    doctors in, so I then drive 25 odd miles to Nottingham's
    main hospital and wait for several hours before an even
    nicer nurse applies seven stitches.

    *

    *Ouch*

    Wish you a speedy recovery. Thanks for my new Sig.

    --
    GizmoDuck - Adventure unicyclist

    o-kO
    ------------------------------------------------------------------------
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  3. Mikefule said:

    I'm a big believer that wheels are round for a reason, and
    I don't do drops... but this one fits my criteria.

    Or it FITTED your criteria?

    Ouch! That was a bad fall. I wish you a speedy recovery. Are
    you sure your eyes are unhurt? I mean if the first nurse is
    exceptionally attractive and the second is even nicer,
    that's almost too much to be coincidence.

    Klaas Bil - Newsgroup Addict
    --
    Today (4 January) is the first day this year that is neither
    the first day this year nor the first day this year that is
    not the first day this year nor the first day this year that
    is neither the first day this year nor the first day this
    year that is not the first day this year.

  4. Mikefule said:

    *My helmet never touched the floor. It never has in any
    UPD from any size of unicycle. A chin guard might well
    have prevented this injury, though. I am likely to buy a
    helmet with a chin guard before riding anywhere near rocks
    again. I was damn' lucky not to break my jaw, and that
    would have been an awful injury to endure. I will have a
    scar, and I will need minor dental repairs. MUni riders,
    and trialsists: think about getting a helmet with a chin
    guard - it doesn't look as stupid as I look right now. *

    ::OUCH!::

    I tried on a 'Giro Switchblade'
    (giro.comcyc switchblade.html) helmet at a
    bicycle shop recently. The chin guard is low and doesn't
    restrict the downward vision as much as I thought it might.
    It's light for a full face helmet. The fiberglass shell full
    face helmets are heavier, they don't vent well at all, and
    the chin guard is larger which means they restrict more of
    your downward vision. The main issue with the Switchblade
    helmet is the price. The MSRP is $180 USD. Still, it's
    cheaper than stitches and dental work. For a full face
    helmet, the Switchblade is the best option that I know of.

    Pictures?? 😉

    --
    john_childs - Guinness Mojo

    john_childs (at) hotmail (dot) com
    Gallery: '' (unicyclist.comjohn childs)
    ------------------------------------------------------------------------
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  5. Mikefule said:

    * Thus protected by my pedantic love of the language, I
    decide to ride down. *

    Great line! Too bad it wasn't sufficient.

    Hope you have a speedy recovery.

    --
    cyberbellum - Level 0.5 rider

    Optimists think the glass is half full. Pesimists think the glass is
    half empty. Engineers think the glass is too big.
    ------------------------------------------------------------------------
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  6. john_childs said:


    *::OUCH!::

    Pictures?? 😉 *

    .of the Nurses?😄

    --
    MUNIYETI - The Abominable MUnicyclist
    ------------------------------------------------------------------------
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  7. Oh man, that had to hurt!!
    Luckily, you don't have to use your chin to uni (expect for the
    landings😉 )
    Hope you heal quickly🙂

    --
    Krashin'Kenny - Crash Tested

    If you ain't crashing, you ain't going fast enough!!!!!!!!!!!

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------
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  8. Mikefule said:

    * Thus protected by my pedantic love of the language, I
    decide to ride down.

    It's easy enough, and I ride over the drainage ledges
    instead of skirting round them as I did on the ascent. A
    couple of times I feel the rim bottom out, and this makes
    me nervous of damaging the wheel - nervous enough to UPD
    on one of the higher ridges.

    *

    Wow Mike, sounds like a great ride and, quite a fall. I
    sincerely hope you heal quickly.

    Now, about your love for language. Just after making fun of
    the language of the trail sign, you then contradict yourself
    by saying "...nervous enough to UPD on one of the higher
    ridges." Sounds as though you chickened out to me. That
    would be a Planned Dismount, not an Un-Planned Dismount. 😉

    Just trying to keep you straight. Heal well. Oh, and
    pictures, yes, pictures. --chirokid--

    --
    chirokid

    ..and a butt that smells like chocolate is good? ? ? ? ? :D joemarshall said:

    * Get some Palmers Cocoa Butter Lotion from Boots. If you put it on in
    the evening after a ride, you'll be fine to ride the next day. As an
    added bonus it smells of chocolate too. Joe *

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------
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  9. chirokid said:

    * Oh, and pictures, yes, pictures. --chirokid-- *

    ..I second (third?) the motion that you get pictures of the
    nurses. There's something about ER nurses... 😄

    --
    cyberbellum - Level 1.0 rider!

    Optimists think the glass is half full. Pesimists think the glass is
    half empty. Engineers think the glass is too big.
    ------------------------------------------------------------------------
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  10. cyberbellum said:

    *There's something about ER nurses... 😄 *

    .. until they smile at you and say "This might sting a
    little" (medical jargon for "This will hurt a lot more
    than getting the cut in the first place"😉 and start
    cleaning the cut. 🙁

    --
    Borges - High impact cerabellum workout

    "Getting caught wearing this helmet may result in death by hanging"
    ------------------------------------------------------------------------
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  11. Glad you're ok Mike, and thanks Harper, for the link

    I started MUni'ing wearing a Giro Switchblade, but have
    since moved to my XC helmet.

    Peering over the rocks when learning (and having a full face
    mask at home) was very intimidating.

    I don't wear it anymore (I got it when getting into drops on
    the MTb) but I sure felt bulletproof while it was on, and
    riding a unicycle there seemed 4 times harder...it turns out
    that mountainbiking is far harder than unicycling)

    Unfortunately, I overheat too easily, and wearing the
    switchblade was far too consticting, I could feel myself
    getting weak with it on during tough rides involving
    uphills as well.

    Hope your healing well!

    I also hope that I am not wearing a Switchblade over my
    broken chin!)

    --
    Sofa - You Tu Tu Tuni?

    'Unicycle Product Reviews'
    (brianmackenzie.comunicycleReviews.aspx)

    'London Unicycling Club Website ' (brianmackenzie.comLUC)
    version 3.0

    'when I'm at the limit of my endurance, 5% extra resistance could be
    enough to stop me in my track. ' - MikeFule

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------
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  12. MY HEAD HAS FALLEN A DISTANCE OF ABOUT 8 FEET (2.4M) AND MY
    JAW HAS TAKEN THE FULL FORCE OF THE IMPACT.

    Uh, falling without the chance of using the hands to stop is
    a nightmare.

    Heal well, Juergen

    --
    juergen_brauckmann - Title? What title?
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  13. Mikefule said:

    *I go over the drop fairly briskly... the tyre digs in...
    my weight pitches forwards... I sail through the air... I
    see the next rocky ledge rushing up towards my face... I
    know it's going to hurt... BANG! *

    it recently dawned on me that i've been missing your write-
    ups this was a bad way to get my fix again

    that will not be a scar it will be a badge of the
    full(e)ness of mike wear it with pride

    --
    GILD - Waffle-[censored]

    SPACESHIP EARTH

    Namaste!
    Dave
    ------------------------------------------------------------------------
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  14. juergen_brauckmann said:

    * Uh, falling without the chance of using the hands to
    stop is a nightmare. *

    I was weird. My hands went out forwards and as i saw the
    ground rushing up to meet me, I think my head went back
    instinctively. My hands and wrists were well protected and
    felt no pain, but later, my shoulders were both sore, so I
    guess that the impact was transferred up my arms, as I know
    my shoulders never hit the floor.

    Meanwhile, my torso hit the floor in more or less a 'belly
    flop'. This meant that everything stopped dead except my
    head which I had pulled back a bit. Momentum being what it
    is, my head soon caught up and the whole blow was focussed
    on my chin.

    I really thought I must have broken my chin, and that was a
    horrible moment. As it happens, the swelling isn't too bad.
    It's visible, but not too painful. There is a line of
    stitches across my chin, and I can't shave that bit so I'm
    starting an asymmetrical goatee.

    UK readers will understand if I compare my current
    appearance to a subtle blend of Bruce Forsyth, Jimmy Hill,
    and Frankenstein's monster. An improvement of sorts!

    --
    Mikefule - Roland Hope School of Unicycling

    Sometimes I ride like a demon, sometimes like a lemon. It's an L of a
    difference.
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