"hemyd" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
"]news:[email hidden]...
Quoted message said:G'day Marie,
I hope I am not accused of venting my own misery onto anyone. I was simply narrating the things
that depressed me initially on dignosis, and how to refute them. The intial poster will invariably
come upon all sorts of comments and statistics that will make him think that "all is lost". Given
a
Quoted message said:little reasoning time, he will be able to rationalise that many of those comments and statistics
do not apply to him - definitely not if he
knuckles
Quoted message said:down and manages his disease as he has surely started. One of the threads
in
Quoted message said:this newsgroup (I think I read it within days of being diagnosed) referred to an "average life
span" of a type II diabetic. It really truly depressed me big time. Woe is me, I thought - I only
have so much time to live, I thought, I'll lose my toes, my kidneys, I'll go blind, etc. etc. Like
the original poster, I though of chucking it in. But then I rationalised -
that
Quoted message said:so-called "average lifespan" refers to any Type II diabetic, ranging from
a
Quoted message said:40 year old whose HbA1c is (as in the case of the original poster) below
6,
Quoted message said:who is fit and who has modified his lifestyle, right through to most diabetics I know who gain
weight, indulge, don't excercise, living in blissful ignorance of what can happen to them. And
then there are the 80 year olds with diabetes - are they part of that "average"?
In my case I needed the shock treatment I got from this newsgroup. It provided the necessary
motivation for me.
Actually, you are probably not accusing me of promoting my misery, but on these "well meaning"
family and friends. yes, that has always baffled me.
In
Quoted message said:my early days after diagnosis, I was submerged in tales of dead diabetic relatives and lost toes
and feet. It made me feel r-e-a-l good! But then there were a few people - usually people I hardly
knew - who would pass on the story of Aunt this or Uncle that, who had diabetes for 40 years or
more,
Quoted message said:and who lived to a ripe old age, with no complications at all, eventually dying for unrelated
reasons. These reports would give me one big boost!
Yes,
Quoted message said:there are these "friends" who, when you say you bought something, will
tell
Quoted message said:you you could have purchased it cheaper somewhere else; if you sold something, you could have got
more for it.... etc. etc. You sometimes need to reassess who your real friends are. Times of
crisis usually make that apparent.....
Henry
Hi Henry.
Reading your first paragraph I began composing an appology in my head........
By the time I got to the end of your post, I realized that you did indeed know where I was coming
from...and had done a much better job of distinguishing honest information (that isn't necessarily
cheerful) from the pissing contest some folks can't seem to resist attempting to engage in.
I agree that sometimes you have to reassess who your real friends are..,especially in times
of crisis.
But what about family?
Well, I guess that everybody has at least one family member that experience has taught us that they
will only promote misery.
I have an aunt who upon hearing of anyone's misery not matter how small or big and terrible responds
with "That's nothing, let me tell you about......."
If the "misery promotor" brings up the subject in casual conversation because they have heard it
through the lightening fast family grape vine, I just tell them it isn't anything I want to talk
about. If they are willing (able?) to take the hint, that is fine. If they continue to attempt a
conversation about the subject, I excuse myself from the conversation as politely as possible.
Yes, there are some wounded feelings from time to time. In some cases it is just unavoidable.
Marie, Caretaker Mom T2
