Bad Unicycle Press

he's jealous

--
General Dibbles - Street Unicyclist

"When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro" Dr. Hunter S. Thompson
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Quoted message said:

"I can't wait for winter to come, not because i ski or snowboard or
even enjoy the snow, I just want the sidewalks to ice over so I can
have temporary relief from those damn unicycles."

sounds like he will have a few other surprises if there are any muni
riders on campus.

EDIT: post this jack-ass's email address..

--
jagur - #3649_all fluff i hear?

---------------------------------------------------
-Forget_Your_Life-
[image: http://gallery.unicyclist.com/albums/albup23/MMulitia.jpg]

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This is the kinda time when you just gotta get out in the saddle not for
fun but to really annoy this guy. I bet he is a computer nerd and never
go's outside. His legs being to weak to even lift him out of a chair. I
feel like a rant burn the paper!!!!!fight the power! Don't take it from
"the man"
Ben

--
thinuniking - U don't be playing me cracker!

I am heman with out the muscles or a cool sword
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I think it's funny that he says "One of MY biggest problems". I would
think of it as more of an issue to be addressed by the rider of the
chosen vehicular system.

I'm just glad it's popular enough to be annoying.

--
mscalisi - Not such a newbie anymore
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Quoted message said:

-Originally written by some arrogant know-it-all -
*One of my biggest problems with the unicycle is that it is not an
efficient means of transportation; it looks both tiring and difficult
to ride one, so why would you ever chose this method to travel around
campus? *

A true intellectual. They know that unicycling is inefficient because it
"looks" tiring and difficult. This is a person who will go through
university and the rest of their life doing lots of "looking" and very
little "trying" or "knowing." Why bother when you can look and learn?

--
harper - Fountainhead

-Greg Harper

B L U E S H I F T

"You go through life and you choose." - Greg Harper

"Find weak people and take stuff from them" - Greg Harper
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This guy needs professional help. Someone w/ no self esteem like him are
the ones (you read on the papers) who snap, go on a rampage then shoots
himself. Let's harass him! 😄

--
jawnz - Somebody stop that unicycle!

Those who long for immortality don't know what to do on a rainy Sunday
afternoon.
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BoojiBoy said:

This was in the Maine Campus newspaper...

"*Unicycles, construction and 'Magic'...please, no more*
Matt Kearney

...there were only a few of you, making you *unique*...

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it
means.

--
steveyo - new old guy

steveyo

Pray to God, but keep rowing for shore. - old Russian proverb
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This person clearly isn't acting as an adult, or a journalist.

He is RANTing.

This individual has issues, and should not be a representative of your
schools journalism.

If you feel disturbed by this persons view, you are not alone.

--
DigitalDave - scabless

'nf7-s ~ xp2400mobile'
(http://www.anandtech.com/mysystemrig.html?rigid=21988)
'19,748 3dm01' (http://service.futuremark.com/compare?2k1=8191641)

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All the unicyclist on campus should pitch in and buy this guy a unicycle
( acheap one, since he may burn it, but it's the thought that counts).

--
PopeSamXVI - Resident Hogwasher/Hornswaggler

Karol Jozef Wojtyla Forever!

I really am the president of my own fan club. www.samhunterfanclub.tk
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Dear Matt Kearney,
When reading your remarks about unicyclists, a number of words crossed
my mind, a few of them being intolerance, prejudice, and ignorance.
First off, would you mind telling us why you find unicycles so
"bothersome?" You state that one of your biggest problems is that
unicycles are an inefficient form of transportation. Is this based on
any sort of fact? If so, I'd like to see the paper on unicycle
efficiency as compared to other forms of transportation.
In my multiple years of college, I found unicycling to be the most
efficient form of transportation possible on campus. A unicycle is much
faster than walking, and while not as fast as a bicycle, doesn't get
stuck in the between-class migration like bicycles do. In a crowd,
unicycles take up about as much space as a person walking, can go at
walking pace much easier than a bicycle can, and is able to make sharp
turns, stop, or even go backwards when that is needed to avoid
collisions.
And have you ever tried to find parking for a car or bicycle on campus?
Sometimes it's nearly impossible, but a unicycle is very easy to lift up
and put in whatever space is available on the bike racks.
And by the way, I rode my unicycle through every winter nature threw at
me, including the sub-zero days with ice on the roads and three feet of
snow everywhere else. Don't think you can get rid of us that easily.
Before you try to pick on a group like unicyclists again, try this.
-Think- first, -write- second. This may be a novel concept and may be
difficult at first, but over time it does become quite easy. Kind of
like unicycling.

--
paco - Co-Founder of the PacoGild Movement

"You could switch out the unicycles for badgers, and the game would be
the same."
-Sockmonster
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I did a little lurking around http://www.mainecampus.com/ and found this
letter to the editor under "Soap Box".

Letters to the editor
Published: Thursday, October 21, 2004
Article Tools: Page 1 of 2

* Kearney's 'Magic' touch

I am writing in response to Matt Kearney's "Unicycles, construction and
'Magic' ... please, no more" which appeared in the Oct. 18 edition of
The Maine Campus.

Possible solutions to Kearney's qualms concerning UMaine would be:

1. Construction on the library be immediately halted so that a ramp
could be built over the Union, thus cutting two minutes off his route
through campus. "Kearney's Ramp"has a nice ring to it, eh?

2) The unicyclists and poor people of this town should be sent to the
leper colony where they belong.

3) All kittens should be murdered.

Right.

While unicyclists are planted so low in your esteem - as in, not of his
supposed sexed-up social standing - this should at least secure some
compassion for them. And really, how many people get to use "Sorry I'm
late, I just got run over by a unicycle," as a legitimate tardy
excuse?

Making fun of Magic Cards? Way overdone. So uncool, it is cool.

And finally, the subject of Talmar Woods. As a UMaine student who has
lived in Orono my whole life - including a five year stint in Talmar
Woods - I find the obvious middle-class-xenophobia to be totally
inappropriate material covered covered in a university newspaper.
Illegitimate children? Perhaps the Kearney parents should have used
better contraception.

So, congrats Maine Campus for perpetuation a multitude of stereotypes in
a very unclever way. While I do generally enjoy The Maine Campus and its
staff's humorous musings, I think one should be tactful and dignified
along with being funny.

I fear the only fair punishment for such an article being written is for
Kearney to ride through Talmar Woods on a unicycle for another
much-needed four-year stay here at UMaine.

M. D.
Junior English major

--
UniBrier - Its Time to Ride

Steve De Cuckoo

"Only an idiot would try to ride a pointed stick with a wheel on the
bottom." - ‘tiped again’ on the early stages of mastering the uni.

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Sounds like it's supposed to be a humorous column. Then you are getting
press. The word is that there are more and more of you. Though the word
is also that you are pimple-faced and probably don't get laid much, if
someone is interested in unicycling they won't let that bother them.

Your response should be to create more unicycling babies. If you want to
make an editorial response, you should make it funny, and not mean.
Something like what the Harley riders use: "If you had to ask, you
wouldn't understand."

If you can find a way to poke fun at his ranting articles without being
overtly direct, that could be fun too. But mostly to say "Yup, we're
here, we don't care if you don't understand us, and we're not going away
so have a nice life!"

--
johnfoss - Walkin' on the edge

John Foss, the Uni-Cyclone
"jfoss" at "unicycling.com" -- www.unicycling.com

"It's good to find something that makes boys into men and men into boys,
my opinion is that unicycling fits the bill." -- Lloyd Johnson

"Read the rules!"
'IUF Rulebook' (http://www.unicycling.org/iuf/rulebook/)
'USA Rulebook' (http://www.unicycling.org/usa/competition/)
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'Is your college paper in this list ....?'
(http://www.cosmictribune.org/collnews.htm)

I want to find out where I can submit my rebuttle.
(in my previous post)

--
DigitalDave - scabless

'nf7-s ~ xp2400mobile'
(http://www.anandtech.com/mysystemrig.html?rigid=21988)
'19,748 3dm01' (http://service.futuremark.com/compare?2k1=8191641)

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You should come to JMU.
Someone wrote a few weeks ago in our paper that I made their day when
they saw me go down some stairs as they went by.

--
Skippii - Bassist
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They usually find it fun to post a rebuttal from a unicyclist, since
they think we're a bunch of freaks.

lol

we are a bunch of freaks!!

--
unijuggler - TOTAL NEWBIE

i should have eaten my wheaties

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Post his email, mail or any address so we can really show him the
unicycle way. Oh and Magic is a super dope game too. I used to be like
3rd in state but i am selling my 10k+ of cards to finance my new muni...

--
Catboy - I enjoy the taste of dirt!

[image: http://pics.xs.to/pics/04063/catko.jpg]
I have the amazing power to talk to cats!=^.^=
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Catboy said:

*Post his email, mail or any address so we can really show him the
unicycle way. Oh and Magic is a super dope game too. I used to be like
3rd in state but i am selling my 10k+ of cards to finance my new
muni... *

yeah I'll just start signing up for online offers and use his email.
Also I'll order pizzas to his address.

--
TheObieOne3226 - Judge me by my size, do you?

[image: http://img54.exs.cx/img54/4743/yodaweedresize.jpg]
http://gallery.unicyclist.com/SWAT
singlewheeledattackteam.1hwy.com
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Send a cheap unicycle to his address. That'll get him.

--
digitalattrition - Hand Signals are Key

"Ok, I think if you just pull off of that guys bumper, we'll be ok"
--Tim to ShadowUni after parallel parking.

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Great suggestions guys. I thought the article was more funny than
insulting. I rode through the snow all last year, where was he then?

I think I'm actually going to try and get one of my friends who writes
for the Maine Campus to do a real article on us. An exclusive inside
look at the world of extreme unicycling on campus. They could get a
picture or two of us riding down stairs or doing some Muni/Trials in the
woods. I have a nice shot of me riding on top of one of the entrance
signs that would be great, but might get me in trouble.

'here's that pic if you want to see' (http://tinyurl.com/5gvl9)

His e-mail address i believe is [email hidden]

It's true though, we are multiplying like crazy. It's awesome.

--
BoojiBoy - Punk Rock Rider

www.skawabunga.com
www.purevolume.com/skawabunga
www.epluribusfunk.tk
gallery.unicyclist.com/epluribusfunk
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