Au Naturel?

Bruce W.1 said:

This glossary: bicycling.comfactOpen ↗
s/glossary/0,3494,s1,00.html describes *Au Naturel* as:
When riders stop off the back of the pack to take a leak
in the woods. During crucial stages pissing is done on the
bike, but when the pack is tooling along slowly riders
will stop. At this point Gerry from Radio Tour will
announce riders are taking, l'au naturel.

So the other day I was pondering this matter while riding;
how to take a whiz while riding. My [censored] is not long
enough to reach around my waist so I gave up on the idea.

Now I learn that in the Tour de France these guys whiz
while riding. I'm left wondering how they do this.

Maybe this length matter is what separates the pros from
the amateurs, but I doubt it.

Maybe they just [censored] their pants. Maybe that's what the
second water bottle is for. Maybe they wear a diaper.
Maybe their Johnson is connected to a tube. But I doubt
all of these too.

Can anyone shed some light on this topic? How does one
whiz while riding?

According to a friend who does it, you roll up the leg of
your shorts. Or don't bother. It all gets washed by someone
else at the end of the stage anyway.

"Zog The Undeniable" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:40ead7e2.0@entanet

Quoted message said:

Bruce W.1 wrote:

[...]

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

Can anyone shed some light on this topic? How does one
whiz while riding?

According to a friend who does it, you roll up the leg of
your shorts. Or don't bother. It all gets washed by
someone else at the end of the stage anyway.

Your [censored] gets washed by someone else at the end of the
stage? Wow! That's professionalism!

--

A: Top-posters.
B: What is the most annoying thing on Usenet?

DRS said:

Your [censored] gets washed by someone else at the end of the
stage? Wow! That's professionalism!

I think they're called "assisted showers" in the seedier
parts of London!

"Bruce W.1" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:cFAGc.7503$pY2.5986@lakeread01...

Quoted message said:

This glossary: bicycling.comfactOpen ↗
s/glossary/0,3494,s1,00.html describes *Au Naturel* as:
When riders stop off the back of the pack to take a leak
in the woods. During crucial stages pissing is done on the
bike, but when the pack is tooling along slowly riders
will stop. At this point Gerry from Radio Tour will
announce riders are taking, l'au naturel.

So the other day I was pondering this matter while riding;
how to take a whiz while riding. My [censored] is not long
enough to reach around my waist so I gave up on the idea.

Now I learn that in the Tour de France these guys whiz
while riding. I'm left wondering how they do this.

Maybe this length matter is what separates the pros from
the amateurs, but I doubt it.

Maybe they just [censored] their pants. Maybe that's what the
second water bottle is for. Maybe they wear a diaper.
Maybe their Johnson is connected to a tube. But I doubt
all of these too.

Can anyone shed some light on this topic? How does one
whiz while riding?

Thanks for your help.

This question is more appropriate for the group
rec.bicycles.racing.

Thanks.
--
Marty

It is a competitive edge, why they carry those little water
bottles around. It is said to be for drink but they are
trying not to shock the "-fidels". So by drinking as much
water as possible they can give the arrears the golden
showers ad infinitum and thus gain an advantage as their
competitors slow down to avoid being too overwhelmed.

OK Ill stop here.

<snip>

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

Can anyone shed some light on this topic? How does one
whiz while riding?

Thanks for your help.

This question is more appropriate for the group
rec.bicycles.racing.

Thanks.
--
Marty

The QUESTION's not too bad, but the ANSWERS definitely
belong over there!

M

Marty said:

"Bruce W.1" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:cFAGc.7503$pY2.5986@lakeread01...

Quoted message said:

This glossary: bicycling.comfactOpen ↗
s/glossary/0,3494,s1,00.html describes *Au Naturel* as:
When riders stop off the back of the pack to take a leak
in the woods. During crucial stages pissing is done on the
bike, but when the pack is tooling along slowly riders
will stop. At this point Gerry from Radio Tour will
announce riders are taking, l'au naturel.

So the other day I was pondering this matter while riding;
how to take a whiz while riding. My [censored] is not long
enough to reach around my waist so I gave up on the idea.

Now I learn that in the Tour de France these guys whiz
while riding. I'm left wondering how they do this.

Maybe this length matter is what separates the pros from
the amateurs, but I doubt it.

Maybe they just [censored] their pants. Maybe that's what the
second water bottle is for. Maybe they wear a diaper.
Maybe their Johnson is connected to a tube. But I doubt
all of these too.

Can anyone shed some light on this topic? How does one
whiz while riding?

Thanks for your help.

This question is more appropriate for the group
rec.bicycles.racing.

Thanks.
--
Marty

Seems technical to me. And I must admit, my curiousity is
now piqued. I would think that hosing on yourself could
cause you to possibly develope a rash or irritation.

Life is Good! Jeff

"Jeff Starr" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
"]news:[email hidden]...
|
|
| Marty wrote:
| > "Bruce W.1" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
| > news:cFAGc.7503$pY2.5986@lakeread01...
| >
| >>This glossary: bicycling.comfaOpen ↗
| >>cts/glossary/0,3494,s1,00.html describes *Au Naturel*
| >>as: When riders stop off the back of the pack to take a
| >>leak in the woods. During crucial stages pissing is done
| >>on the bike, but when the pack is tooling along slowly
| >>riders will stop. At this point Gerry from Radio Tour
| >>will announce riders are taking, l'au naturel.
| >>
| >>So the other day I was pondering this matter while
| >>riding; how to take a whiz while riding. My [censored] is
| >>not long enough to reach around my waist so I gave up
| >>on the idea.
| >>
| >>Now I learn that in the Tour de France these guys whiz
| >>while riding. I'm left wondering how they do this.
| >>
| >>Maybe this length matter is what separates the pros from
| >>the amateurs, but I doubt it.
| >>
| >>Maybe they just [censored] their pants. Maybe that's what the
| >>second water bottle is for. Maybe they wear a diaper.
| >>Maybe their Johnson is connected to a tube. But I doubt
| >>all of these too.
| >>
| >>Can anyone shed some light on this topic? How does one
| >>whiz while
riding?
| >>
| >>Thanks for your help.
| >
| >
| > This question is more appropriate for the group
| > rec.bicycles.racing.
| >
| > Thanks.
| > --
| > Marty
| >
| >
| Seems technical to me. And I must admit, my curiousity is
| now piqued. I would think that hosing on yourself could
| cause you to possibly develope a rash or irritation.
|
| Life is Good! Jeff

They say it's an effective cure for athlete's foot. No
personal experiences; just going on what 'they' say..... ED3

Click (here) if you would like to see pictures of Homer
Simpson peeing his pants while riding a bike.

Leo Lichtman said:

Click (here) if you would like to see pictures of Homer
Simpson peeing his pants while riding a bike.

Nicely done, I must say.

Bill "anyone but Mr. Burns" S.

Quoted message said:

Now I learn that in the Tour de France these guys whiz
while riding. I'm left wondering how they do this.

Maybe this length matter is what separates the pros from
the amateurs, but I doubt it.

Maybe they just [censored] their pants. Maybe that's what the
second water bottle is for. Maybe they wear a diaper.
Maybe their Johnson is connected to a tube. But I doubt
all of these too.

Can anyone shed some light on this topic? How does one
whiz while riding?

Another poster got it right; you roll up your shorts. Size
doesn't matter in this case, aside from having to find it
(on a cold ride, there might not be much there).

Triathletes are known for just going in their shorts, but
it's not the best way to go (so to speak); most have noticed
that, when riding in the rain, one gets a lot more saddle
sore. Cycling in soaked shorts is simply going to be less
comfortable.

--Mike-- Chain Reaction Bicycles
www.ChainReactionBicycles.com

Mike Jacoubowsky said:

Another poster got it right; you roll up your shorts. Size
doesn't matter in this case, aside from having to find it
(on a cold ride, there might not be much there).

Triathletes are known for just going in their shorts, but
it's not the best way to go (so to speak); most have
noticed that, when riding in the rain, one gets a lot more
saddle sore. Cycling in soaked shorts is simply going to
be less comfortable.

--Mike-- Chain Reaction Bicycles
www.ChainReactionBicycles.com

============================================================

Let me see if I got this right. You roll up one leg of your
shorts, then [censored] under your leg while coasting (downhill
of course).

Thanks, I'll give this a try.

Blowing snot on other riders is nothing compared to this!

"Bruce W.1" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:jPWGc.8497$pY2.3340@lakeread01

Quoted message said:

Mike Jacoubowsky said:

Another poster got it right; you roll up your shorts.
Size doesn't matter in this case, aside from having to
find it (on a cold ride, there might not be much there).

Triathletes are known for just going in their shorts, but
it's not the best way to go (so to speak); most have
noticed that, when riding in the rain, one gets a lot
more saddle sore. Cycling in soaked shorts is simply
going to be less comfortable.

Let me see if I got this right. You roll up one leg of
your shorts, then [censored] under your leg while coasting
(downhill of course).

Thanks, I'll give this a try.

No, you roll up one leg of your shorts, flop it over your
leg and [censored] whilst continuing to chase the breakaway. Oh,
you mean you can't?

--

A: Top-posters.
B: What is the most annoying thing on Usenet?

DRS said:

"Bruce W.1" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
news:jPWGc.8497$pY2.3340@lakeread01

Quoted message said:

Mike Jacoubowsky said:

Another poster got it right; you roll up your shorts.
Size doesn't matter in this case, aside from having to
find it (on a cold ride, there might not be much there).

Triathletes are known for just going in their shorts, but
it's not the best way to go (so to speak); most have
noticed that, when riding in the rain, one gets a lot
more saddle sore. Cycling in soaked shorts is simply
going to be less comfortable.

Let me see if I got this right. You roll up one leg of
your shorts, then [censored] under your leg while coasting
(downhill of course).

Thanks, I'll give this a try.

No, you roll up one leg of your shorts, flop it over your
leg and [censored] whilst continuing to chase the breakaway. Oh,
you mean you can't?

=========================================

Like I already said, my [censored] is not that long.

I know this would be a valuable skill to have, if it can
be done without hitting anything. If I can't learn the
details here then I guess trial and error will have to be
the method. Rolling up a pants leg is a good start
though, thanks.

Pissing while riding might seem like an odd skill to have
but it's much more valuable to me than the ability to inhale
air through your anus: heptune.comfarts.htmlOpen ↗