Assume the position...

"Old Timer" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
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Quoted message said:

Anyone who has done this will instantly recognize the advantage this position has over all others
for breaking the thousands of spider webs one runs through during an early morning, first guy out
there, run, during the warmer months of the year. Its either do that or eat webs. Still, this
provides no protection for the lower part of the body, but webs on the legs aren't nearly as
annoying as they are stretched over the fact.

🙂. Sounds like my Queeny park runs.... Another method you might try is
finding a long thin stick that is light enough to hold by the end. That way you can still pump
your arms.....

James

(Old Timer) said:

Stretch your arms out in front of you, horizontally. Now bend your arms at the elbows so your
forearms are vertical, pointing straight up. Next, move your hands in towards the center, while
still vertical, till they touch each other.

That sound like the position I take before every race.

subsonic

[email hidden] (Old Timer) wrote in message
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Quoted message said:

...not not that one. This one...

Stretch your arms out in front of you, horizontally. Now bend your arms at the elbows so your
forearms are vertical, pointing straight up. Next, move your hands in towards the center, while
still vertical, till they touch each other. Perfect. You have now achieved the best position for
being the first person of the day to run on the trails through the woods.

Ah, so I have been doing it all wrong all of these years! I run with my arms straight out like
Frankenstein. You can usually tell which areas are gonna have the webs, in more open areas I resume
regular running. The worst are the 5 or 6pm runs - apparently the spiders just start rebuilding the
webs at this time and I seem to always seem to get hit in the eyes or worse yet, the mouth. BLECK!
On my last after work trail run I hit 7 of these, then there was a HUGE fully constructed web that I
only noticed b/c it contained about 6 spiders. Needed to shake a stick at that one. I always feel a
little guilty about doing that though. Figure it took them so much work to build. If I can, I try to
run around it, but this one had no other passable option.

-hug

Laurie, you know how the mind gets you out there on the trail, right? I often imagine that days
after my run someone on a mountain bike will stumble across me on the trail, long dead and encased
in a web that was just too strong for me break through as I try to run through it. I die a horrible
death watching in terror as the tiny little spider triumphs over me, gloating at what must surely be
the biggest catch of his tiny little life.

The other one is that I run into a bear. Its going to happen one day, they're occasionally found in
areas not far from my haunt, and I know I've seen bear tracks at least once in a very remote spot.
Sometimes I carry a firearm on my runs in my DeSoto [censored] pack (I have a few design recommendations
for Emilio), but other times when I have that daydream/terror I fancy that I manage to escape down
to the lake and outswim the damned thing. As if I've ever outswam anything!

Last night I made an error in judgement that had me running through the woods at the height of a
thunderstorm. I really enjoy running under those circumstances, the smells of wet earth, rain,
ozone, leaves, and wet trees plus the wind and water really make you feel like you're accomplishing
something special. The error last evening was that it was too close to dark, and the woods were
completely darkened, good thing I knew where I was running. For some reason I remembered the "Blair
Witch Project" and I got totally freaked out! If I could only muster that fear during a race I'd
take home hardware every time.

In article said:

The other one is that I run into a bear. Its going to happen one day, they're occasionally found
in areas not far from my haunt, and I know I've seen bear tracks at least once in a very remote
spot. Sometimes I carry a firearm on my runs in my DeSoto [censored] pack (I have a few design
recommendations for Emilio), but other times when I have that

I saw a comic strip where someone recommended filing the sight off of a pistol if you're going to
use it to shoot a bear. When the person with the gun asked why, the guy said "So it doesn't hurt as
much when the bear takes it away from you and shoves it up your nose."

Two birds were listening, and one said, "I've heard that before, but it wasn't the nose." The second
one said, "Yeah, but this is a family comic strip."

On a similar note, if you run where there are bears, you should tie bells to your shoes to scare
them off, and carry pepper spray. Also look for bear [censored] to know if there are any around. You can
distinguish the bear [censored] from other kinds because it has little bells and pepper spray in it.

Finally, do you know how to tell the difference between a black bear and a grizzly bear? When it's
chasing you, climb a tree. If the bear climbs the tree and eats you, it's a black bear. If it knocks
the tree over and eats you, it's a grizzly bear.

I hope this helps.

--Harold Buck

"I used to rock and roll all night, and party every day. Then it was every other day. . . ."

- Homer J. Simpson

[email hidden] (Old Timer) wrote in message
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Quoted message said:

I often imagine that days after my run someone on a mountain bike will stumble across me on the
trail, long dead and encased in a web that was just too strong for me break through as I try to
run through it. I die a horrible death watching in terror as the tiny little spider triumphs over
me, gloating at what must surely be the biggest catch of his tiny little life.

TOO funny, that seems like a Far Side cartoon. The web I encountered with the 6 spiders might have
just been such a web.

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

Last night I made an error in judgement that had me running through

the woods at the height of a thunderstorm. For some reason I remembered the "Blair Witch Project"
and I got totally freaked out!

And wasn't the Blair Witch Project filmed in your neck of the woods in Maryland? Bwah ha ha ha ha.

-hug

FYI.... after taking mountaineering courses and such:

The ONLY way to out-run a bear is going down a decently steep hill. They have to hold themselves
back, or they will tumble down under their weight.

Other than that, a bear will always be able to out-climb, out-run, and out-swim your ass.

Prevention?
- 1. Don't corner/trap a bear (even if you don't know it, like getting between the bear and the
door if they broke in)
- 2. Don't get between a bear and it's young (again, you might not know it, so heads up!)

Good luck :-) -Ross

"Ross" <[email hidden]> wrote in message "]news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

FYI.... after taking mountaineering courses and such:

The ONLY way to out-run a bear is going down a decently steep hill. They have to hold themselves
back, or they will tumble down under their weight.

Other than that, a bear will always be able to out-climb, out-run, and out-swim your ass.

That's true about running downhill from a bear. However, if you are trying to out climb a bear,
you should choose a skinny tree so that when you reach the top you can pull the tree over and
hop-scotch to another tree. All you need are two skinny trees close enough so that you can
rotate back and forth all day until the bear goes for help from another bear. Then you need at
least three trees you can swing back and forth from. If you can't find a skinny tree, go for a
robust tree with lots of limbs. What you do is climb out on a limb that is close enough for you
to grab another limb. When Smokey comes after you, simply grab the other limb while his fat ass
slams to the ground from a broken limb. As far as swimming, you can try what I've seen raccoons
do when chased by dogs to water. The raccoon simply swims under water and pops up behind the dog
and commences to drowning the dog by hanging on to the back and pushing down the head. So if a
human is trying to out swim a bear, they should do the same thing. Just pop up behind that irate
bear, give his ears a good grab and hang on until the bear cries Uncle. There is no doubt in my
mind that I couldn't hang on to the back of that [censored] if I knew I really needed to. But of
course I'm not so sure a bear can't reach behind his head while swimming so as to swat and claw
you. Therefore, you choose an area in the lake that is 6 to 8 feet deep. You hold your breath
under water for just 20 seconds while you are looking up at that irate bear trying to get you.
You pop up for air, behind the bear, get a nice breath of fresh air and submerge to the bottom
all over again. My 9 year old daughter and I can do this exercise in our pool practically
forever. That bear will probably decide to go dry and try the tree thing all over again.

Rick Swanger

Quoted message said:

Prevention?
- 1. Don't corner/trap a bear (even if you don't know it, like getting between the bear and the
door if they broke in)
- 2. Don't get between a bear and it's young (again, you might not know it, so heads up!)

Good luck :-) -Ross

Ross said:

Prevention?
- 1. Don't corner/trap a bear (even if you don't know it, like getting between the bear and the
door if they broke in)
- 2. Don't get between a bear and it's young (again, you might not know it, so heads up!)

3. When in bear country, always run with someone slower than you.

Mike Tennent "IronPenguin"