Are you a real cyclist???

Should be more than 35 MPH on a flat road...

Cyclist14 said:

Should be more than 35 MPH on a flat road...

i wasn't so sure whether to go for the 25 or 35, but you're right.

Most co-ordinated people could get a bike going 40km/h...most could pass someone up a hill providing they were slower. I dont ride the same route everyday because I have different needs for my training, sherryl crow is ugly and old. If you are playing basketball and not braking a sweat you aren't working hard enough...its a tough sport, I hate it though 😎 . I drink and eat fatty stuff because I ride +500km's a week so I dont put on weight anyway...I dont know the guys at my LBS because I order off probikekit for most things and have learnt to fix my own bike. Climbed a hill thats more than 2 miles long? pfft WHO CANT??? I dont eat ice cream because it gives me brain freezes and ouchy teeth not because its fatty or sugary. I only have one pic of lance that hangs in my bedroom...BTW whats with the snot thing? is it supposed to offend cyclists.

hate to sound like a troll but thats a pretty strange looking list

I have gone more than 35, sorry don't like Crowe. How come it need be pictures of Lance? I climb constantly where I live,no choice.
I also misread the one requirement by thinking it said eat a cheerleader getting ready for a bikini contest. Does that get me any points?

jhuskey said:

I also misread the one requirement by thinking it said eat a cheerleader getting ready for a bikini contest.

In season I eat more like a sumo wrestler getting ready for a bikini contest.

Funny stuff...been there done all of that...and back to starting from scratch.

List brought back some memories though 🙂

I agree on the 35mph...even that's being rather nice though ... I'd say 40mph 😉

Cyclist14 said:

Should be more than 35 MPH on a flat road...

should be averaging 40 mph on a mountain bike going up alpe d'huez...

ya bunch of poofs.

MountainPro said:

should be averaging 40 mph on a mountain bike going up alpe d'huez...

ya bunch of poofs.

With a 35 kph head wind!

The hill climbing bit should be at least 10 miles and 6%.

[quote="yjuosj"][font=Times New Roman]You are a real cyclist if…[/font][font=Verdana][/QUOTE][/font]

[font=Times New Roman]You ever gone more than 25 miles an hour on a flat road (going downhill doesn’t count).[/font]
Yes!

[font=Times New Roman]You ever climbed a hill… that’s more than 2 miles long.[/font]
[font=Times New Roman]Yes![/font]

[font=Times New Roman]Ever passed a guy/gal while climbing.[/font]
Yes!

[font=Times New Roman]You haven’t eaten a banana split (or ice cream) for more than a year.[/font]
[font=Times New Roman]Haven't had one of these since I was 8 years old.[/font]

[font=Times New Roman]You hear somebody say “snot” and giggle like a little girl..[/font]
[font=Times New Roman]No, I only gigle like a little girl when someone calls me "Stupid Head!"[/font]

[font=Times New Roman]You’ve crashed more the 7 times.[/font]
[font=Times New Roman]In my teens.[/font]

[font=Times New Roman]You eat like a cheerleader-getting-ready-for-a-bikini-competition and ain’t exactly getting ready for a bikini competition.[/font]
[font=Times New Roman]I have no idea ? I have never been a cheerleader nor in a bikini contest. Please, tell us what it was like.[/font]

[font=Times New Roman]You know two or more of the guys working at your local bike shop. (by name)[/font]
[font=Times New Roman]You bet ! Good guys too.[/font]

[font=Times New Roman]You think an Ensure is a well balance meal and what’s even worst… actually likes it!!![/font]
[font=Times New Roman]Does Guinness count ?[/font]

[font=Times New Roman]You ride the same route every day, but has no idea of what it really looks like.[/font]
[font=Times New Roman]I know exactly what it looks like, most "real cyclists" do.[/font]

[font=Times New Roman]You know what a kilometer is and how to convert it.[/font]
[font=Times New Roman]Easy.[/font]

[font=Times New Roman]You know that lactate threshold is not a kind of milk.[/font]
[font=Times New Roman]I'm not a competitive cyclist so I don't give a [censored].[/font]

[font=Times New Roman]You drink fat free, lactose free milk and actually likes it!!![/font]
[font=Times New Roman]See above.[/font]

[font=Times New Roman]When you play basketball (or any other sport), are the last man/lady standing with a big smile on your face and barley even breaking a sweat.[/font]
[font=Times New Roman]I always stand with a smile on my face,,, my wife stands with fist.[/font]

[font=Times New Roman]Treat your bike better than your girlfriend or wife.[/font]
[font=Times New Roman]My girfriend and wife are a whole lot "funner" than my bike.[/font]

[font=Times New Roman]You have more than two pictures on Lance Armstrong.[/font]
[font=Times New Roman]There's at least 2 in the Cycle Sport magazine I have sitting next to me.[/font]

[font=Times New Roman]You think Sheryl Crow is hot…[/font]
[font=Times New Roman]Definitely sit on the face material .[/font]

[font=Times New Roman]If you answer "no" two more than two of these, you’re not a real cyclist.[/font]
[font=Times New Roman]🙄 [/font]



[font=Times New Roman]Please post more “You’re not a real cyclist if…”[/font]

I am a real cyclist because I actually ride my bike, instead of trying to come up with stupid reasons to call myself a "real cyclist."

baj32161 said:

I am a real cyclist because I actually ride my bike, instead of trying to come up with stupid reasons to call myself a "real cyclist."

If you find this thread not funny at all or are a little bit up thight about it:

1) You're not a realy cyclist 😄
2) Your seat might be too high!!! :eek:

jhuskey said:

With a 35 kph head wind!

pulling a large trailer of monkeys

MountainPro said:

pulling a large trailer of monkeys

What kind of monkeys? How about Cotton Top Tamarins. We could start a whole new thread on types of monkeys.

MountainPro said:

should be averaging 40 mph on a mountain bike going up alpe d'huez...

ya bunch of poofs.

...60 mph up alpe d'huez with a 120-mph headwind

Cyclist14 said:

...60 mph up alpe d'huez with a 120-mph headwind

I forgot one thing...a Wal -Mart MTB.

so lets re-cap,

60 mph up ald'huez with a strong head wind pulling Cotton Top Tamarins in a trailer with a wall mart mountain bike while drunk?

bloody amateurs...

jhuskey said:

I forgot one thing...a Wal -Mart MTB.

MountainPro said:

so lets re-cap,

60 mph up ald'huez with a strong head wind pulling Cotton Top Tamarins in a trailer with a wall mart mountain bike while drunk?

bloody amateurs...

And at least one flat tire.

... blindfolded and pedaling with only one leg... 🙄 😄