Bugs

Elisa Francesca Roselli said:

Remembering - how could I forget - the day on my kick-scooter when I
swallowed a large bluebottle

The solution is given in an old cycling song.
And its very environmentally friendly.

There was a Frenchwoman who rode a bike,
I don't know why she swallowed a fly.
Perhaps she'll die.

There was a Frenchwoman who swallowed a spider,
That wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her,
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly,
I don't know why she swallowed the fly,
Perhaps she'll die.

Elisa Francesca Roselli said:

As the weather turns nice, clouds of midges and gnats are starting to
form. Larger and less clean biological specimens are also air-borne and
thickening.

Remembering - how could I forget - the day on my kick-scooter when I
swallowed a large bluebottle (ah, that savour of rotting melon lingering
at the back of my throat for the rest of the week ...), and being
conscious that on a cycle, one sooner or later ends up opening one's
mouth to breathe, I want to ask you people if there are any standard
solutions.

It occurs to me that I have never seen a cyclist wearing a veil. Why
not?

Funny you should mention that. If you recall, I posted a few weeks ago
about availability of some kind of mosquito net I could wear as an
anti-bug-inhaling measure.

Well I made a mask myself using nylon netting. It is simply a 6x9"
rectangle of the nylon netting in front, with a thicker piece of netting
tied to each end that loops around the neck much as a simple surgeon's
mask. When I get to bug territory, I pull the mask up from around my neck
and cover the mouth.

There is negligible if any air resistance so breathing is not inhibited.

As I make my daily good mornings, trail walkers have been known to say "Who
was that Masked Man?" ;-p

-B
Hi-ho!

In article <[email hidden]>,
[email hidden] says...

Quoted message said:

As the weather turns nice, clouds of midges and gnats are starting to
form. Larger and less clean biological specimens are also air-borne and
thickening.

Remembering - how could I forget - the day on my kick-scooter when I
swallowed a large bluebottle (ah, that savour of rotting melon lingering
at the back of my throat for the rest of the week ...), and being
conscious that on a cycle, one sooner or later ends up opening one's
mouth to breathe, I want to ask you people if there are any standard
solutions.

Make a virtue out of necessity, and be glad of the extra protein?

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Remove the ns_ from if replying by e-mail (but keep posts in the
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On Tue, 18 May 2004 08:00:41 -0400, David Kerber <ns_dkerber@ns_ids.net>

Quoted message said:

Make a virtue out of necessity, and be glad of the extra protein?

Although this is the standard funny line, if you've ever inhaled a bug and
spent the next 10 minutes hacking and coughing and turning colors you know
this is a serious issue among those that cycle near our insect friends.

Plus, think of the reincarnated Buddists you're possibly saving. ;-p

-B

Elisa Francesca Roselli said:

Remembering - how could I forget - the day on my kick-scooter when I
swallowed a large bluebottle (ah, that savour of rotting melon lingering
at the back of my throat for the rest of the week ...), and being
conscious that on a cycle, one sooner or later ends up opening one's
mouth to breathe, I want to ask you people if there are any standard
solutions.

Keep a couple of sachets of HP sauce in your pocket.

In article <[email hidden]>,
[email hidden] says...

Quoted message said:

On Tue, 18 May 2004 08:00:41 -0400, David Kerber <ns_dkerber@ns_ids.net>

Quoted message said:

Make a virtue out of necessity, and be glad of the extra protein?

Although this is the standard funny line, if you've ever inhaled a bug and
spent the next 10 minutes hacking and coughing and turning colors you know
this is a serious issue among those that cycle near our insect friends.

I know. I've been lucky, and never ingested anything larger than a gnat
or very small fly. If you're quick to spit, you can often get them out
anyway.

--
Remove the ns_ from if replying by e-mail (but keep posts in the
newsgroups if possible).

On Tue, 18 May 2004 08:25:55 -0400, David Kerber <ns_dkerber@ns_ids.net>

Quoted message said:

In article <[email hidden]>,
[email hidden] says...

Quoted message said:

On Tue, 18 May 2004 08:00:41 -0400, David Kerber <ns_dkerber@ns_ids.net>

Quoted message said:

Make a virtue out of necessity, and be glad of the extra protein?

Although this is the standard funny line, if you've ever inhaled a bug and
spent the next 10 minutes hacking and coughing and turning colors you know
this is a serious issue among those that cycle near our insect friends.

I know. I've been lucky, and never ingested anything larger than a gnat
or very small fly. If you're quick to spit, you can often get them out
anyway.

The problem is after you've choked on a couple it causes you to alter the
way you breathe, in my experience. As I noted to Elisa it's pretty easy to
make a net or gauze mask that you can pull up. If you use neutral colored
piece of nylon netting, such as a stocking it's hardly noticeable to anyone
else.

-B

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

Remembering - how could I forget - the day on my kick-scooter when I
swallowed a large bluebottle

The solution is given in an old cycling song.
And its very environmentally friendly.

There was a Frenchwoman who rode a bike,
I don't know why she swallowed a fly.
Perhaps she'll die.

There was a Frenchwoman who swallowed a spider,
That wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her,
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly,
I don't know why she swallowed the fly,
Perhaps she'll die.

NOOO! Don't do that! In the full version she ends up swallowing a bird,
cat, dog and after some more ends up with a cow which kills her.

If you are going to try this at least wear a cycle helmet.

Yours,

Mark.

Quoted message said:

As the weather turns nice, clouds of midges and gnats are starting to
form. Larger and less clean biological specimens are also air-borne and
thickening.

Quoted message said:

Remembering - how could I forget - the day on my kick-scooter when I
swallowed a large bluebottle (ah, that savour of rotting melon lingering
at the back of my throat for the rest of the week ...), and being
conscious that on a cycle, one

Quoted message said:

sooner or later ends up opening one's
mouth to breathe, I want to ask you people if there are any standard
solutions.

Well insect encounters on a bike.

I recall doing a ride with a couple of friends. It was fully loaded touring in
Michigan. The pesky deer flies would come out of the woods after us and you
could watch them fly after your buddies. It was hilarious seeing them go for
all they were worth a few feet behind the other person's head. We varied our
speeds and discovered their max was about 12 mph.

On another ride, a friend of mine and I were riding in Michigan and it was a
Sunday morning. There was some mist and light rain early on. From time to
time, we would go through a cloud of gnats. Gnats like hanging out near tall
objects like mailboxes ("tall" is relative). Anyrate, we got pretty hungry
after awhile but we kept going and going and there was nothing open. Finally
we came on a small diner that had trucks parked in front of it and even a few
Semis. So we stopped there. The place was pretty well packed but we got a
spot at the counter. The truckers saw the gnats plastered on our still wet
faces and they really got a laugh out of that one!

I now live in central Florida. I rode around Lake Monroe Sunday. On the way
back there was a slight downhill with a tail wind and for some reason you can
really go on the section of road with those conditions. I was cruising at 25
mph. I had to keep my mouth closed though because the love bugs were out in
force and they were bouncing off of me like hail. Love bugs probably haven't
been anywhere bad but I wouldn't want one down the wind pipe. Love bugs
really are not "bugs" at all (bugs are hemiptera). Love bugs are actually a
kind of fly that got imported from Argentina and now seems to reside here in FL
with the sole purpose of getting splattered on people's cars.

I also get stung about once or twice per year. I think the stings are from
wasps and probably Polistes but I am not sure because usually by the time I
feel the sting, the insect is long gone.

John Hearns said:

That wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her,

Might be hard to cycle with all that going on ...

EFR
Ile de France

Mark Thompson said:

NOOO! Don't do that! In the full version she ends up swallowing a bird,
cat, dog and after some more ends up with a cow which kills her.

Besides, what about vegetarians?

EFR

Badger_South said:

The problem is after you've choked on a couple it causes you to alter the
way you breathe, in my experience. As I noted to Elisa it's pretty easy to
make a net or gauze mask that you can pull up. If you use neutral colored
piece of nylon netting, such as a stocking it's hardly noticeable to anyone
else.

And I was having these lovely Edward Gorey style images in my mind, of the
cartwheel hat swathed in yards of frothy tulle...

But there is the wind resistance to consider.

EFR
Ile de France

Badger_South said:

The problem is after you've choked on a couple it causes you to alter the
way you breathe, in my experience.

Yeah, especially when one of them is a wasp...

EFR
Ile de France

Elisa Francesca Roselli said:

Mark Thompson said:

NOOO! Don't do that! In the full version she ends up swallowing a
bird,
cat, dog and after some more ends up with a cow which kills her.

Besides, what about vegetarians?

I think one goes in somewhere between the dog and the cow by my reckoning.

Colin

"Elisa Francesca Roselli" <[email hidden]>
wrote in message news:[email hidden]...

Quoted message said:

Underneath I wear cut-off tights and a lacy slip.

:o)

Quoted message said:

Recently I bought a pair of shoes...they have
knobby rubber bubos on the bottom that adhere beautifully..... On top
they are like Alice in Wonderland shoes, in bright metallic silver.

Should this be in alt.fetish???

Quoted message said:

I've been contemplating shaving my head.

Yes, I was right!

(Sorry, Elisa!)

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Elisa Francesca Roselli said:

I go for the Dork Look, myself. I already have a little rear-view mirror
attached to my helmet like a Martian antenna. Then, as you recall, I prefer to
ride in skirts. But to keep them out of the pedals I tie them up in a great
knot over my right knee, or take the back up between my legs and tuck it in
front like a baby's diaper. Underneath I wear cut-off tights and a lacy slip.
Recently I bought a pair of shoes that work well for cycling, because they have
knobby rubber bubos on the bottom that adhere beautifully to the pedals. On top
they are like Alice in Wonderland shoes, in bright metallic silver.

As I suffer a lot from heat and sweat in the summer I've been contemplating
shaving my head.

I think a veil or mask would complete my outfit admirably, but I'm slightly
worried about being interned.

Whoa. I think you've invented a new genre, or perhaps a throw-back to the
days of the horseless carriage and big bonnets; a sort of Julie
Andrews-chic.

I admire your panache, although I'm not sure what you mean by 'being
interned'. Is that a euphemism for being netted by the boys in white coats?
In that case, hey, they have to catch you first, eh?

You're more likely to become famous and perhaps a tourist attraction. Do
you have a web page with jpgs of your flying attire?

May I add I'm immensely fond of reading your postings. ;-)

-B

Quoted message said:

Quoted message said:

NOOO! Don't do that! In the full version she ends up swallowing a
bird, cat, dog and after some more ends up with a cow which kills
her.

Besides, what about vegetarians?

Quorn fed - gotta be tasty :-)

Elisa Francesca Roselli said:

As the weather turns nice, clouds of midges and gnats are starting to
form. Larger and less clean biological specimens are also air-borne and
thickening.

Remembering - how could I forget - the day on my kick-scooter when I
swallowed a large bluebottle (ah, that savour of rotting melon lingering
at the back of my throat for the rest of the week ...), and being
conscious that on a cycle, one sooner or later ends up opening one's
mouth to breathe, I want to ask you people if there are any standard
solutions.

It occurs to me that I have never seen a cyclist wearing a veil. Why
not?

EFR
Ile de France
(mais non M'dame, ce n'est pas un signe ostenatoire d'appartenance
réligieuse ...)

LOL - mais tristement. I've never seen a British cyclist wear a veil over
their mouths either, so I doubt if _that_ is the reason. I've not yet
swallowed a fly, but I have seen a big wasp go 'twoing' off my spectacles
at high speed.

AC

Elisa Francesca Roselli said:

Mark Thompson said:

NOOO! Don't do that! In the full version she ends up swallowing a bird,
cat, dog and after some more ends up with a cow which kills her.

Besides, what about vegetarians?

Nah, it's a horse.

I know an old lady who swallowed a horse...she's dead of course