...or...
...Why cheese is an unsuitable material for the manufacture of bicycle locks.
<rant>
I am not sure whether to be displeased with H+lf+rds or not, for the heinous crime of fabricating
bicycle locks out of cheese. Last night mine decided to jam while securing my bicycle to a sturdy
wrought iron fence because, as far as I could tell, the internals of the device were made from
cheese, Fortunately Nice Lady Jax (who, in the words of Mr. M. Millington, is a person I pay to be
my friend), while not in possession of the of the size of toolbox that usually does to my back what
wrestling forklifts does to that of mine chum Uncle Marvo, /did/ have a sturdy hammer. A Several of
minutes of beating the lock wif the said hammer resulted in it separating, like two-thirds of Gaul,
into two parts and liberating the faithful bicycle from the clutches of New Cross. The lock,
however, is now suitable only for tolchocking the gulliver of the acned muppet who sold it to me,
and thus now decorates a dustbin in E17.
Had the lock not been made of cheese, I doubt I should have been able to beat it to deth, but then
again, I wouldn't have needed to.
</rant>
Thank you. I feel better now.
--
Dave Larrington - legslarry.beerdrinkers.co.uklegslarry.beerdrinkers.co.ukOpen ↗
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Editor - British Human Power Club Newsletter
bhpc.org.ukbhpc.org.ukOpen ↗
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