Got this from my BIL yesterday:
Who Is Jack Schitt?
For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves at a loss when
someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt!" Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now
respond in an intellectual way.
Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt,
the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack.
In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie
Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against
her parents' objections, Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. After being
married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and, because
her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe
Schitt Sherlock.
Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition
named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable
throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding
announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials.
The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to
tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
Now when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt", you can correct them.
Sincerely, Crock O. Schitt
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j.j. ~ mom, gamer, novice cook ~ ..fish heads, fish heads, eat them up, yum!