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Stags and staggering

Started by Mikefule · · Last activity · 34 posts · 495 views

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rec.sport.unicycling
Published
4 November 2007
Last activity
8 November 2007
Original author
Mikefule
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34
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  1. Well, I haven't been doing much riding recently. I've probably averaged
    about a ride a month over the alleged summer, and my fitness levels are
    lower than ever. I was Morris dancing the other night and realised
    I'll soon need a sports bra.:o

    So today, the weather was excellent, and I had the whole day free...

    I arrive at the car park in Sherwood Forest to find everyone else has
    noticed the good weather too. It's hard to find a parking space. I
    then walk back to the ticket machine and find the price has gone up 50%
    over the summer.

    I mount and set off along a familiar wide track, with tall pine trees
    to my right, full of kids screaming and shouting as they walk and
    scramble along the wires of the "Go Ape!" facility.
    ( http://www.goape.co.uk/ContentArticle.aspx?Id=95 )

    A couple of people ahead of me are plodding along in the wrong gears on
    mountainbikes. One of them notices me approaching, and they are shamed
    into speeding up a bit. On the KH24 with 165s, I am still not going
    that much slower than them!

    At the first opportunity, I turn off onto a narrow single track path
    that weaves beneath the canopy of trees. The ground is undulating but
    firm, and the wheel makes no noise on the carpet of pine needles.

    Back out onto a main track, and again I meet mountain bikers, plodding
    along and missing all the best bits of the forest.

    At every chance, I take the narrower track, always aiming up hill to
    gain some early gravity karma. I am pleased that after about a month
    with no exercise to speak of, I am spinning along fairly briskly.

    Part of my regular route takes me along a narrow path at the edge of
    the woods. Somehow I find myself entering this section from the wrong
    end, and stomping up a moderately steep hill. On a whim, I turn off
    and swoop up and over a low bank onto a wider track that runs around a
    field boundary. This is glorious: out of the shade of the trees, the
    sun is shining down on me. Parts of the forest here are beech or
    birch, and the leaves are many hues of red, gold and yellow.

    Unfortunately, the route itself becomes a bit boring to ride and rather
    full of families on bicycles, all of whom feel the ened to comment, so
    I take another couple of turns, and find my way back to the point where
    I came over the bank. It is slightly more difficult in this direction,
    but I make it over without a UPD. I feel quite smug that I can still
    do it after such a break.

    A bit later, I find myself plodding up a long sandy and gravelly hill.
    My way is blocked by a fallen tree, but I keep going and, as expected,
    I find a new path that skirts around the obstacle. Somehow, clumsily,
    lazily, complacently, or just knackeredly, I UPD just as I get back
    onto the original path. I've probably ridden a mile and a half so I
    need a break anyway.

    After a short break, I remount, and continue my semi random route
    through the forest, sometimes under tall stately pines, sometimes
    ducking and battling my way between small plantation conifers.
    Sometimes the trees are silver birch, with their silver trunks and
    golden leaves. Dry autumn leaves carpet the floor.

    Then on a narrow path, I see a jogger coming towards me, and he has a
    dog: a weimeraner.
    http://tinyurl.com/25ny55

    It comes lolloping towards me at high speed like a slightly camp Hound
    of the Baskervilles, drawn in pastels. The owner shouts it, but it
    ignores him, so I dismount to appear more human, and try to befriend
    it. It ignores me, preferring instead to wade in a deep muddy puddle.

    I exchange pleasantries with the jogger, then carry on my way.

    And then I turn off onto a narrow path between small plantation
    conifers, and I see something ahead that looksl like an animal... a
    large dog? No, it's a deer, its head bent down as it grazes. It is
    blocking my path, but that's no problem - It's a rare privilege to get
    a good sighting of a deer in this part of the forest. In dozens of
    rides around here, I've only had one good sighting before, and that was
    near sunset.

    I stand stock still and watch the deer. It seems to be ignoring me, so
    I slowly creep towards it. It must be 100 metres or more away. It
    lifts its head and I see the antlers in silhouette. It is a stag - a
    roe deer, I think. This link is to something broadly similar:
    http://www.dcs.gov.uk/Graphics/ecologyRoeBuck.jpg

    I watch the stag for what seems like ages, gradually creeping towards
    him. Every so often, he looks up, judges my distance, then carries on
    grazing. Then I hear sounds behind, and it is the jogger and his dog,
    running towards the deer. I put up my hand as a warning, and the
    jogger seems to understand immediately, because he turns off down a
    side track without comment, taking his dog with him.

    After another couple of minutes, I get too bold, and the deer is
    suddenly gone.

    Later in the ride, more silver birch trees, and beneath them are fly
    agarics, their bright red caps with their distinctive white spots.
    This is just the time to see them before they start to get broken and
    rotten. Beautiful things:
    http://tinyurl.com/3xwoa4

    And then I find the area of humps and hollows where the BMXers never
    seem to congregate any more. Over the summer, someone has been with a
    digger and made a real mess of it, so I spend only a few minutes here
    before moving on. As I leave, I start the descent of a steep bank, I
    UPD unnecessarily and I have to run to avoid falling over. My first
    foot step is heavy, and jars my back. Hours later, my shoulder is
    stiff and sore, and you really don't want to know what I'm typing this
    with.😉

    Already, and hour or so into the ride, I am feeling tired. Fitness
    goes so quickly, and is a little bit harder to regain each time. I get
    into a series of those annoying UPDs where the pedal sort of rolls
    forward under your foot, dumping you on the ground before you can do
    anything about it. It's a sure sign of fatigue, and bad technique
    creeping in. Another sure sign of fatigue is the swearing it
    provokes.

    From here, I find mainly familiar routes, with one or two interesting
    diversions, back to the car park. After about an hour and three
    quarters, I am totally zonked. But the good thing is, I seem to have
    lost no confidence or skill, only the stamina.

    Back home and a bath to freshen up. I look in the mirror: those moobs
    are no smaller.:o

    I couldn't think of a deliberate mistakes quiz (I'm out of practice),
    so here's a general knowledge question:

    What has always had 13, but has gone from 13 to 15 to 20, 21, 23, 24,
    25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 43, 44, 45, 46,
    48, 49 and then, not necessarily finally, to 50? Answers by PM.

    --
    Mikefule

    Everyone seeks the illusion of purpose.
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  2. Hey Mike,

    great write up. Lovely to have you back 😄

    No brain power left to do the quiz though.

    --
    cathwood

    Cathy
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  3. Hey Mike,

    great write up. Lovely to have you back 😄

    No brain power left to do the quiz though.

    --
    cathwood

    Cathy
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  4. Hey Mike,

    great write up. Lovely to have you back 😄

    No brain power left to do the quiz though.

    --
    cathwood

    Cathy
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  5. Thanks for those of you who emailed with kind messages of support. Some
    of the newer forum members might have been mystified, but there is
    quite a long tradition of me writing up my rides, and concealing quizes
    in them. Unfortunately, life has got in the way a bit recently.

    Well, five people entered the "tacked on" quiz, but the thread seems
    not to have taken life, so I'll give the answer now. Look away if you
    don't want to know...

    Four people were very close, but not quite close enough.

    Hugh was correct...

    The answer is...

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  6. Thanks for those of you who emailed with kind messages of support. Some
    of the newer forum members might have been mystified, but there is
    quite a long tradition of me writing up my rides, and concealing quizes
    in them. Unfortunately, life has got in the way a bit recently.

    Well, five people entered the "tacked on" quiz, but the thread seems
    not to have taken life, so I'll give the answer now. Look away if you
    don't want to know...

    Four people were very close, but not quite close enough.

    Hugh was correct...

    The answer is...

    Posted Via Usenet.com Premium Usenet Newsgroup Services
    ----------------------------------------------------------
    ** SPEED ** RETENTION ** COMPLETION ** ANONYMITY **
    ----------------------------------------------------------
    http://www.usenet.com

  7. Thanks for those of you who emailed with kind messages of support. Some
    of the newer forum members might have been mystified, but there is
    quite a long tradition of me writing up my rides, and concealing quizes
    in them. Unfortunately, life has got in the way a bit recently.

    Well, five people entered the "tacked on" quiz, but the thread seems
    not to have taken life, so I'll give the answer now. Look away if you
    don't want to know...

    Four people were very close, but not quite close enough.

    Hugh was correct...

    The answer is...

    Posted Via Usenet.com Premium Usenet Newsgroup Services
    ----------------------------------------------------------
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  8. How should we know that answer... we were born here! ha!

    --
    rem48
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  9. How should we know that answer... we were born here! ha!

    --
    rem48
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  10. How should we know that answer... we were born here! ha!

    --
    rem48
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  11. rem48 said:

    How should we know that answer... we were born here! ha!

    Wikipedia is a wonderful thing. It even has America in it.🙂

    --
    Mikefule

    Everyone seeks the illusion of purpose.
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  12. rem48 said:

    How should we know that answer... we were born here! ha!

    Wikipedia is a wonderful thing. It even has America in it.🙂

    --
    Mikefule

    Everyone seeks the illusion of purpose.
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  13. rem48 said:

    How should we know that answer... we were born here! ha!

    Wikipedia is a wonderful thing. It even has America in it.🙂

    --
    Mikefule

    Everyone seeks the illusion of purpose.
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  14. The US flag briefly had 15 stripes when Kentucky and Vermont were
    admitted to the union. With the admission of the next 5 states it was
    decided that the field would be too crowded and so the tradition of
    maintaining 13 stripes to represent the 13 original states was
    introduced. The stars in the blue field have continuously indicated the
    current number of states.

    --
    harper

    -Greg Harper

    *jc is the only main man. there can be no other.*
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  15. The US flag briefly had 15 stripes when Kentucky and Vermont were
    admitted to the union. With the admission of the next 5 states it was
    decided that the field would be too crowded and so the tradition of
    maintaining 13 stripes to represent the 13 original states was
    introduced. The stars in the blue field have continuously indicated the
    current number of states.

    --
    harper

    -Greg Harper

    *jc is the only main man. there can be no other.*
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  16. The US flag briefly had 15 stripes when Kentucky and Vermont were
    admitted to the union. With the admission of the next 5 states it was
    decided that the field would be too crowded and so the tradition of
    maintaining 13 stripes to represent the 13 original states was
    introduced. The stars in the blue field have continuously indicated the
    current number of states.

    --
    harper

    -Greg Harper

    *jc is the only main man. there can be no other.*
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  17. Mikefule said:

    Four people were very close, but not quite close enough.

    You would never make a GCSE examiner.

    Nao

    --
    Naomi

    The dress in which I unicycled was not THAT short, but in retrospect, I
    think that maybe the blue one would have been more appropriate to the
    terrain. Nao April 2007.
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  18. Mikefule said:

    Four people were very close, but not quite close enough.

    You would never make a GCSE examiner.

    Nao

    --
    Naomi

    The dress in which I unicycled was not THAT short, but in retrospect, I
    think that maybe the blue one would have been more appropriate to the
    terrain. Nao April 2007.
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  19. Mikefule said:

    Four people were very close, but not quite close enough.

    You would never make a GCSE examiner.

    Nao

    --
    Naomi

    The dress in which I unicycled was not THAT short, but in retrospect, I
    think that maybe the blue one would have been more appropriate to the
    terrain. Nao April 2007.
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  20. - - -
    I exchange pleasantries with the jogger, then carry on my way.
    - - -

    I liked this. Ambiguity makes good reading.

    --
    goldenchicken III
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