K2

Your 1st line caught me and I thought, "Oh my god! What a person!" And
I was ready to give kudos.

Later...

And the purpose of that was.....?

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Quoted message said:

A few weeks ago I attempted to climb K2.

Quoted message said:

From the base camp, I gazed up at its immense snowy whitness. I was

suddenly filled with a sense of foreboding, but also with grim
determination and steely resolve.

I began the ascent.

About half way up, I accidentally stepped on a mountain goat and fell
roughly 1000 feet.

Impact. I realized that I couldn't move. I was paralyzed. I lay there
for hours. Eventually hunger set in.

I decided to eat my penis.

I needed to keep my energy levels up - it was vital for survival.

It tasted like chicken.

I was subsequently rescued, but unfortunately had to have my head
amputated due to frost bite.

Let this be a lesson to all of you.

Quoted message said:

Let this be a lesson to all of you.

Dr. Evil?

"I am Homer of Borg. You will be assim...ooooohhh, donut"!

Quoted message said:

A few weeks ago I attempted to climb K2.

Quoted message said:

From the base camp, I gazed up at its immense snowy whitness. I was

suddenly filled with a sense of foreboding, but also with grim
determination and steely resolve.

I began the ascent.

About half way up, I accidentally stepped on a mountain goat and fell
roughly 1000 feet.

Impact. I realized that I couldn't move. I was paralyzed. I lay there
for hours. Eventually hunger set in.

I decided to eat my penis.

you should've started with your fingers.