Jokes · Public discussion

Only at Wal Mart

Started by Cowboyathlete · · Last activity · 2 posts · 2,403 views

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Jokes
Published
13 September 2004
Last activity
13 September 2004
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Cowboyathlete
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2
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  1. One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind
    him, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor".
    "Listen,you don't have to spend that kind of money,"Mike replies. There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample and
    the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It
    takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars...a lot cheaper than a
    doctor."
    So Joe deposits a urine sample in a jar and takes it to Wal-Mart. He
    deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the
    urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds
    later,> the computer ejects a printout: "you have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping
    @Wal-Mart.

    That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology
    was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed
    some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife
    and daughter,and a sperm sample for good measure. Joe hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results.
    He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results. The computer prints the following:
    1. Your tap water it too hard. Get a water softner (aisle 9)
    2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (aisle 7)
    3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit.Get her into a rehab.
    4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
    5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better.
    Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart.

  2. ROFL. Oops, gotta run. I need to drop off some samples.

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