Jokes · Public discussion

Warning Labels

Started by Cipher · · Last activity · 3 posts · 2,312 views

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Jokes
Published
10 September 2004
Last activity
10 May 2016
Original author
Cipher
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  1. Canadian liquor manufacturers have accepted the Health Canada's
    suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on
    all varieties of alcohol containers:
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the
    hell happened to your bra and panties.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are
    whispering when you are not.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a
    [censored].
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends
    over and over again that you love them.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that
    ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the
    morning.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically
    converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are
    tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are
    laughing WITH you.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may be a major factor in getting
    your ass kicked.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: the crumsumpten of alcohol may Mack you tink you kan tpye reel
    gode

  2. LOL!!! Me like this post!!!

  3. These are so funny. The warning label should contain all of the above. People should come with warning labels too. I'm just amazed how far some people will go. When something is over, IT'S OVER. There is no reason to call at 4am, Lol. Warning you might not remember what you said, at all.
    Warning you could continue a relationship you should have ended long ago or maybe never started.
    Warning other people look better while you are under the influence.
    Warning consuming alcohol with another may lead to them never going away.
    Warning IT'S OVER take the hint and do yourself a favor she's not EVER coming back, but you might be inclined to think she will under the influence of.
    Warning larger sized people may suddenly seem thinner and funnier.
    Warning If you still don't want him back under the influence you know IT'S OVER. He'll end up drinking more.
    This could go on forever.

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