Tyler,
Time to bag it my man. I know you never told your family, friends,
some teammates and even Haven about what was going on. "Man's gotta
do what a man's gotta do" is what we'd say. It was great we didn't
have to do the daily E-shots for the last couple years and it actually
almost felt legit. Like spitting in a jar and then swallowing it back
at a later time.
Sucks that the bags got mixed up - but they got mixed up and it showed
up. Valiant effort to fight it - You had to try and save face as
there were so many people dependent on you. They don't get it and
never really will. It started out so simply back in the day - we were
just trying to keep up with the big boys out there - trying not to get
embarrassed and keep our sponsors so we could keep our rides. Who
knew it would get this far - who knew that our heroes weren't really
any better than we were. I remember thinking about how anticlimactic
the whole thing was once we "broke through".
One thing leads to another and then another and all of a sudden there
are some big dollars on the table and lots of people in all directions
who want you to keep doing what you're doing. The pressure of all the
people on the periphery is the tough part- soigneurs, wrenches,
domestiques, directors. They need to feed their families which is why
we all try to protect the machine. They're the innocents in this
whole thing but always take the big hit.
Too late though - it's over and has been for a couple months now.
Protect Haven - don't spend a dime of your hard-earned money on this.
Retire into the sunset.
The only thing left to do is give the medal back. You don't want that
thing - you know what you did and who you beat on the level playing
field at Athens. Your bros know as well and I know it too.
And don't sing like Manzano either - He didn't help anything - it was
too much too soon. Just tell enough so you can come clean to the
people around you that really matter or else it'll eat you up inside
for the rest of your days. In ten years the only people that still
matter are the ones you need to tell.
-B