General fitness, health and nutrition · Public discussion

This was not inthe plans...

Started by The Ranger · · Last activity · 5 posts · 95 views

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General fitness, health and nutrition
Published
9 June 2007
Last activity
10 June 2007
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The Ranger
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5
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  1. [Posted to am 6/25/01, a measly six days after school let out. --
    TR]

    0600. Dawn is just peaking through with her early light.

    I am typing away, clickity-clack, answering important posts with
    my normal charm, wit, humor, and humility.

    Spawn, drawn by the staccato noises, slogs down the hallway and
    into the computer room. She quietly sways to her own music, still
    unsure if she's going to wake or fall back asleep, while waiting
    for me to pick her up.

    I stop typing in mid-message and look at her. We don't need verbal
    noise to ask and answer if this is indeed what she's waiting for.
    She mutely shuffles forward and reaches upwards. I quietly pull
    her up and into my lap. She burrows down in my over-sized T-shirt
    and wraps it around her tiny frame like a favorite blanket. Soon,
    the soft snuffle of her breathing tells me that she's made her
    choice.

    I go back to reading e-mail and news articles. Since typing is now
    out, I recline slowly back to make myself more comfortable.

    I reach for my coffee cup.

    There is a sudden, muffled, "brap;" the detonation that ALL
    parents know and dread.

    My chest is bathed in something warm. The fumes hit me like
    mustard gas.

    I drop my coffee cup and kick the chair as far back from my
    computer as possible.

    Spawn is awake again, but not fully. She's trying to cry between
    heaves.

    I hunch forward and retain the wrap around Spawn and jump up. My
    computer chair, designed by The Experts not to tip over, falls
    back with a loud thump. Still hunched over, I sprint out of the
    room and into the hallway, towards the Daughter-units' bathroom.
    Spawn and her stomach's contents are cradled together. The
    unmistakably soured odor of stomach lining and partially digested
    broccoli stagger me. My eyes tear from the acridness.

    We make it down that twelve-foot tube of carpeting without a
    dollop dribbled.

    Spawn has not stopped heaving. She's now fully awake. The world
    now knows she is very unhappy.

    Her sisters, also awakened by the Sound That Is Universal, run to
    their bathroom adding another level to the cacophony of noises.
    Both make some very unhelpful remarks about the smell. I growl at
    them to get out and go get SWMBO.

    I strip the Spawn down and start the shower going. She's a
    shivering Medusa. I put her nightgown into one of the sinks. I
    remove my T-shirt, thankful for its billowy cotton mass. I wrap it
    into a ball and set it in on top of Spawns. SWMBO rounds the
    bathroom corner and skids to a halt. The haunted pity radiates
    from her eyes.

    We tag team Spawn in the shower. She responds slowly, enjoying the
    warm tickling caress of the water. Her body still spasms
    uncontrollably but her stomach is no longer trying to purge
    itself. As SWMBO washes her, we calm her. She is toweled her off.
    She has one final single body-wracking spasm as if exorcising the
    experience from her body.

    SWMBO volunteers to sit with Spawn and suggests I clean up. I do
    so.

    When I finish, I check in on Spawn. She is asleep again, wrapped
    in her own blanket, in her own bed. SWMBO motions for us to leave.

    So much for grand plans and sunny summer days; Boardwalk and 17
    will have to wait. They aren't that important.

    The Ranger

  2. In article <[email hidden]>,

    The Ranger said:

    So much for grand plans and sunny summer days; Boardwalk and 17
    will have to wait. They aren't that important.

    The Ranger

    Kids can be a loving challenge... :-)

    I've not had any but I've had a few interesting experiences with my
    nephews.

    I'm actually delighted that they are back here in town now instead of in
    Phoenix.

    I'd rather share the positives and negatives than not be able to share
    at all...
    --
    Peace, Om

    Remove _ to validate e-mails.

    "My mother never saw the irony in calling me a Son of a [censored]" -- Jack Nicholson

  3. "The Ranger" <[email hidden]> wrote in message
    news:[email hidden]...

    Quoted message said:

    [Posted to am 6/25/01, a measly six days after school let out. -- TR]

    0600. Dawn is just peaking through with her early light.

    I am typing away, clickity-clack, answering important posts with my normal
    charm, wit, humor, and humility.

    Spawn, drawn by the staccato noises, slogs down the hallway and into the
    computer room. She quietly sways to her own music, still unsure if she's
    going to wake or fall back asleep, while waiting for me to pick her up.

    I stop typing in mid-message and look at her. We don't need verbal noise
    to ask and answer if this is indeed what she's waiting for. She mutely
    shuffles forward and reaches upwards. I quietly pull her up and into my
    lap. She burrows down in my over-sized T-shirt and wraps it around her
    tiny frame like a favorite blanket. Soon, the soft snuffle of her
    breathing tells me that she's made her choice.

    I go back to reading e-mail and news articles. Since typing is now out, I
    recline slowly back to make myself more comfortable.

    I reach for my coffee cup.

    There is a sudden, muffled, "brap;" the detonation that ALL parents know
    and dread.

    My chest is bathed in something warm. The fumes hit me like mustard gas.

    I drop my coffee cup and kick the chair as far back from my computer as
    possible.

    Spawn is awake again, but not fully. She's trying to cry between heaves.

    I hunch forward and retain the wrap around Spawn and jump up. My computer
    chair, designed by The Experts not to tip over, falls back with a loud
    thump. Still hunched over, I sprint out of the room and into the hallway,
    towards the Daughter-units' bathroom. Spawn and her stomach's contents are
    cradled together. The unmistakably soured odor of stomach lining and
    partially digested broccoli stagger me. My eyes tear from the acridness.

    We make it down that twelve-foot tube of carpeting without a dollop
    dribbled.

    Spawn has not stopped heaving. She's now fully awake. The world now knows
    she is very unhappy.

    Her sisters, also awakened by the Sound That Is Universal, run to their
    bathroom adding another level to the cacophony of noises. Both make some
    very unhelpful remarks about the smell. I growl at them to get out and go
    get SWMBO.

    I strip the Spawn down and start the shower going. She's a shivering
    Medusa. I put her nightgown into one of the sinks. I remove my T-shirt,
    thankful for its billowy cotton mass. I wrap it into a ball and set it in
    on top of Spawns. SWMBO rounds the bathroom corner and skids to a halt.
    The haunted pity radiates from her eyes.

    We tag team Spawn in the shower. She responds slowly, enjoying the warm
    tickling caress of the water. Her body still spasms uncontrollably but her
    stomach is no longer trying to purge itself. As SWMBO washes her, we calm
    her. She is toweled her off. She has one final single body-wracking spasm
    as if exorcising the experience from her body.

    SWMBO volunteers to sit with Spawn and suggests I clean up. I do so.

    When I finish, I check in on Spawn. She is asleep again, wrapped in her
    own blanket, in her own bed. SWMBO motions for us to leave.

    So much for grand plans and sunny summer days; Boardwalk and 17 will have
    to wait. They aren't that important.

    Awwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!

  4. I got it down the back of my shirt and into my pants once, while holding my
    monster on my shoulder. More volume of vomit than the size of the child.
    Amazing. Now he's 18 and he thinks it's hilarious. He'll get his.

  5. JoeSpareBedroom said:

    I got it down the back of my shirt and into my pants once, while holding my
    monster on my shoulder. More volume of vomit than the size of the child.
    Amazing. Now he's 18 and he thinks it's hilarious. He'll get his.

    ROFL...I told my daughter that the other day when she laughed when the
    newborn I was sitting did it to me.

    --
    -Gina in Italy

    Sig Not Found.

    If found, return to me promptly.

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