General fitness, health and nutrition · Public discussion

Re: Wonderfully off topic

Started by LeftPinkyToe75 · · Last activity · 1 post · 216 views

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General fitness, health and nutrition
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23 December 2004
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LeftPinkyToe75
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  1. Quoted message said:


    This is a multi-part message in MIME format.

    ------=_NextPart_000_0476_01C4E3C3.E197DB10


    Haha 🙂

    Quoted message said:

    The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of =
    Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so =
    "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the =
    Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying =
    it as well.

    ----------

    Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic =
    (absorbs heat)?

    Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law =
    (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some =
    variant.

    One student, however, wrote the following:

    First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we =
    need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate =
    at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a =
    soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

    As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different =
    religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state =
    that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. =
    Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not =
    belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to =
    Hell.

    With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of =
    souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of =
    change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order =
    for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of =
    Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

    This gives two possibilities:

    1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls =
    enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase =
    until all Hell breaks loose.

    2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in =
    Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes =
    over.

    So which is it?

    If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year =
    that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you, and take =
    into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 =
    must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already =
    frozen over.=20

    The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it =
    follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, =
    extinct...leaving only Heaven thereby proving the existence of a divine =
    being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."

    THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A."=20

    ------=_NextPart_000_0476_01C4E3C3.E197DB10
    Content-Type: text/html;
    charset="iso-8859-1"
    Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable

    <HEAD><STYLE></STYLE></HEAD><DIV>The following is supposedly an actual
    question given =on a=20University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The
    answer by one student =was so=20"profound" that the professor shared it with
    colleagues, via the =Internet, which=20
    is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as=20well.

    ----------

    Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives =off=20heat) or endothermic
    (absorbs heat)?

    Most of the students wrote =proofs of=20their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas
    cools when it expands and heats =when it is=20compressed) or some variant.

    One student, however, wrote the=20following:

    First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is =changing in=20time. So we
    need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell =and the=20rate at
    which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that =once a=20soul
    gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are =leaving.

    As=20for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different
    =religions that=20exist in the world today. Most of these religions state
    that if you are =not a=20member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since
    there is more than =one of=20these religions and since people do not belong
    to more than one =religion, we can=20project that all souls go to Hell.

    With birth and death rates as =they=20are, we can expect the number of souls
    in Hell to increase =exponentially. Now,=20we look at the rate of change of
    the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law =states=20that in order for the
    temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, =the=20volume of Hell has
    to expand proportionately as souls are =added.

    This=20gives two possibilities:

    1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate =than=20the rate at which souls
    enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in =Hell=20will increase until
    all Hell breaks loose.

    2. If Hell is =expanding at a=20rate faster than the increase of souls in
    Hell, then the temperature and =pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

    So which is =it?

    If we=20accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year
    that, ="it=20will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you, and take
    into =account the=20fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must
    be true, and =thus I am=20sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen
    over.

    The =corollary=20of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it
    follows that it is =not=20accepting any more souls and is therefore,
    extinct...leaving only Heaven =thereby=20proving the existence of a divine
    being which explains why, last night, =Teresa=20kept shouting "Oh my God."

    THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A."=20
    </DIV>

    ------=_NextPart_000_0476_01C4E3C3.E197DB10--

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