Okay. I guess this is the right group to make a New Year's Resolution
statement:
I, Axel Hultman, am hereby enforcing a resolution at 12:00am on
January 1st of 2006 to NEVER masturbate to those beautiful little
Olsen twins EVER AGAIN!
Now, as some of you may already know, I have a bit of a problem with
masturbating, especially to files I obtain over my beloved Internet.
Especially Olsen jpegs. That's my weakness. There. I said it.
This is going to be difficult. I was flipping through one of those
celebrity hairstyle magazines, the kind with a bazillion celebrities.
So I'm flipping through the pages and no one stands out. Then I get to
the page with Ashley Olsen and I'm stopped dead in my tracks and I
look at it and I go: "whoah... okay.. that settles it.. I am
DEFINENTLY a pedophile!" I just couldn't help it.
"Big time."
But no more! I'm not masturbating to the Olsen twins anymore. I will
emerge in 2006 a new, healthier, happier Axel Hultman. No offense,
Olsens, but I've got to grow up and start masturbating to the real
women in my own life!