Road Cycling · Public discussion

Jeff Jones for President!!!

Started by Richard Longwoo · · Last activity · 1 post · 502 views

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Road Cycling
Published
4 May 2004
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4 May 2004
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Richard Longwoo
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  1. Yeah, like, Jeff Jones for president!!!

    Then, a month later, the phone rang -- it was Pol Pot or
    Nixon.

    Someone in a distant state Jeff'd never heard of, had found
    his speech lying on a table in a bus depot, read it, and
    passed it around to a few friends.

    Some of these people had made copies and passed them around
    to more friends.

    Eventually, people all over the state had read his speech
    and, regardless of party affiliation, were nodding their
    heads and saying "Whooooooaa!" to the premises and dreams
    at the foundation of his campaign and at the root of his
    very being.

    A ground swell of grassroots sentiment forced a special
    election which unanimously and immediately elected and
    installed Jeff Jones as governor or president or secretary-
    general of whatever form of government they had there.

    A blue ribbon panel was appointed to help ease his
    transition to power, though the bulk of this was
    accomplished by just handing him the book about the 10 ways
    to avoid vomiting on half a gallon of vodka in half an hour.

    Then Jeff disappeared, which was the best charisma of all.
    Anyway, the people had become so self righteous, it
    nauseated him just to be around them.

    But, every so often, he'd send a telegram to express his
    sorrow at not being able to be there, that evening -- so
    they wouldn't forget who their governor (or President?) was,
    even if he was no longer inhabiting the same world, and no
    longer driven by the same chemistries or geometries or
    histories, or spellings.

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